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A man wakes up in hospital, bandaged from head to foot.
The doctor comes in and says 'Ah, I see you've regained consciousness.
Now you probably won't remember, but I'm afraid you were in a pile-up on the
motorway.'
'You're going to be OK, you'll walk again, everything seems to be OK, but
there is a bit of bad news and I'm going to break it to you as gently as I
can. Your Willy was chopped off in the wreck and we were unable to find it.'
The bloke groans a bit (as you do) but the doctor goes on, 'We've checked
your insurance and you've actually got £9,000 compensation coming to you and
the good news is that we have the technology now to build you a new Willy
that will work just as well as your old one, better in fact.
But the thing is, it doesn't come cheap. It is one thousand pounds an inch.'
The bloke perks up a bit at this (as you would.)
'So it's a simple decision,' the doctor says, 'you need to decide how many
inches you want. But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife.
I mean, if you had a five inch Willy before and you decide to go for a nine
inch Willy now, she might be a bit put out. But if you had a
nine incher before and you decide only to invest in a five incher now, she
might be a bit disappointed.
So it's important that you consult with her to help you make the decision.'
So the bloke agrees to talk with his wife.
The doctor comes back the next day.
'So' he says, 'have you spoken with your wife?'
'I have.' says the chap.
'And has she helped you to make the decision?'
'Yes, she has' he says.
'And what is the decision?' asks the
doctor.
'We're having a new kitchen.'
The doctor comes in and says 'Ah, I see you've regained consciousness.
Now you probably won't remember, but I'm afraid you were in a pile-up on the
motorway.'
'You're going to be OK, you'll walk again, everything seems to be OK, but
there is a bit of bad news and I'm going to break it to you as gently as I
can. Your Willy was chopped off in the wreck and we were unable to find it.'
The bloke groans a bit (as you do) but the doctor goes on, 'We've checked
your insurance and you've actually got £9,000 compensation coming to you and
the good news is that we have the technology now to build you a new Willy
that will work just as well as your old one, better in fact.
But the thing is, it doesn't come cheap. It is one thousand pounds an inch.'
The bloke perks up a bit at this (as you would.)
'So it's a simple decision,' the doctor says, 'you need to decide how many
inches you want. But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife.
I mean, if you had a five inch Willy before and you decide to go for a nine
inch Willy now, she might be a bit put out. But if you had a
nine incher before and you decide only to invest in a five incher now, she
might be a bit disappointed.
So it's important that you consult with her to help you make the decision.'
So the bloke agrees to talk with his wife.
The doctor comes back the next day.
'So' he says, 'have you spoken with your wife?'
'I have.' says the chap.
'And has she helped you to make the decision?'
'Yes, she has' he says.
'And what is the decision?' asks the
doctor.
'We're having a new kitchen.'
