Alan Whittle
Player Valuation: £60m
Bank Holiday Monday and the streets around Selhurst, Upper Norwood, and as far as Thornton Heath High Street are full of agitated souls with agonised faces who are seeking their Destiny. Apparently missing for twenty four years she has been seen recently many times on TV and talked about non stop on the radio. Only a couple of weeks ago these poor deluded fools had held their Destiny in their own hands seemingly, but alas, she has slipped away again and so they must continue to seek.
"Wasn't she on the train with you lid?" asks one pitifully.
"No mate, I never saw her when I got on at Oslo like" came the reply.
"It'll be the Premier League, (they hate us), or Howard Webb, (he hates us), or the media (they hate us), says another with a "Born in Stavanger" tattoo prominently displayed.
"No", says another finally....."It was Chelsea!"
They all nod sagely and sadly enter the Colossus of Selhurst.
And what do they find? Unbelievably they find a Premier League team celebrating their own best season league finish since 1991/92. How can this be? you ask dumbfounded. YOU ask? What do you think we've been doing non stop for the last four weeks? Unbelievable Jeff!
So, the final home game, and a grateful Selhurst will be bouncing for the boys to thank them for such a fantastic season (yes, yes, by our standards) and to take delight in halting the Red Menace at the Pulis Line. Of course, when they flunk it, (oh, and they will btw) the media propaganda machine of global proportions will crank into full swing, (there will be questions in Parliament if we get a penno) about how they are the real champions, the best team overall and how their season has been a complete success and all according to plan. "This could be our year next year lid!"
Rogers scouts have been watching scouting films all week and have changed the squads travel plans and will now arrive on two buses to park across the Whitehorse Lane end. If you can't beat 'em eh Bren?
Even the buses will be no match for Palace's all out, sophisticated, quick, thrusting non stop attacking football......(ahem).
We will do what we always do. Grind them down and nick one. Lets face it. The French defended the Maginot line better than that lot deal with corners. 89th minute Damo Delaney from a Bolasie corner!
Destiny?.........Destiny? Where are yer ??"
Line ups?
Us; Speroni, Marriapa, Delaney, Dann, Ward, Puncheon, Jedinak, Ledley, Bolasie, Chamakh, Jerome.
Them; Grobelaar, Abbey Clancy, Tarby, Yeats, Stigingbyornabe, Carragher, Martin Tyler, Alan Green, Suarez, Fouler, Molby [Poor language removed]
Fear not Blue. We will stop them on the beaches, we will stop them on the streets, we will stop them in the pubs and in the chippys. We will never surrender. And when people come to speak of us in 1000 years, they will say "Palace?" oh yeah, them. I didn't mind them me.
"Wasn't she on the train with you lid?" asks one pitifully.
"No mate, I never saw her when I got on at Oslo like" came the reply.
"It'll be the Premier League, (they hate us), or Howard Webb, (he hates us), or the media (they hate us), says another with a "Born in Stavanger" tattoo prominently displayed.
"No", says another finally....."It was Chelsea!"
They all nod sagely and sadly enter the Colossus of Selhurst.
And what do they find? Unbelievably they find a Premier League team celebrating their own best season league finish since 1991/92. How can this be? you ask dumbfounded. YOU ask? What do you think we've been doing non stop for the last four weeks? Unbelievable Jeff!
So, the final home game, and a grateful Selhurst will be bouncing for the boys to thank them for such a fantastic season (yes, yes, by our standards) and to take delight in halting the Red Menace at the Pulis Line. Of course, when they flunk it, (oh, and they will btw) the media propaganda machine of global proportions will crank into full swing, (there will be questions in Parliament if we get a penno) about how they are the real champions, the best team overall and how their season has been a complete success and all according to plan. "This could be our year next year lid!"
Rogers scouts have been watching scouting films all week and have changed the squads travel plans and will now arrive on two buses to park across the Whitehorse Lane end. If you can't beat 'em eh Bren?
Even the buses will be no match for Palace's all out, sophisticated, quick, thrusting non stop attacking football......(ahem).
We will do what we always do. Grind them down and nick one. Lets face it. The French defended the Maginot line better than that lot deal with corners. 89th minute Damo Delaney from a Bolasie corner!
Destiny?.........Destiny? Where are yer ??"
Line ups?
Us; Speroni, Marriapa, Delaney, Dann, Ward, Puncheon, Jedinak, Ledley, Bolasie, Chamakh, Jerome.
Them; Grobelaar, Abbey Clancy, Tarby, Yeats, Stigingbyornabe, Carragher, Martin Tyler, Alan Green, Suarez, Fouler, Molby [Poor language removed]
Fear not Blue. We will stop them on the beaches, we will stop them on the streets, we will stop them in the pubs and in the chippys. We will never surrender. And when people come to speak of us in 1000 years, they will say "Palace?" oh yeah, them. I didn't mind them me.