Bally's Boots
Player Valuation: £150k
Those 'fashionable' kecks he wore to make a statement to the cameras on the first day back of pre-season.
The Claire Balding bouffant hair do.
Thinking he's good enough to replicate the Gabriel Jesus celebration.
Too big for his boots. Should be grafting to make a name for himself at that age, not trying to be the next concert star of Teen Vogue.
Koff will ya. £47m will do just nicely. It's at least £27m more than I could ever imagine him being sold for in his current state.
Succinct and as blindingly accurate.
I'd sooner have the cash in the bank and the potential to attract a couple of strikers than suffer those kecks again!