I drink a lot of coke, does it worsen anxiety?
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I’m no expert mate, but if it has caffeine in it, I’d say yes, as it’s a stimulant.
AmericasToffee
Player Valuation: £40m
And refined sugar
Disgruntledgoat
Player Valuation: £50m
Sorry, for delayed reply.
Dream jobs... I tried to be a sportsman, but failed at that (which was no biggie, when I look back I'm really glad I fell short there), then I wanted to be an army officer but failed the selection, ended up in the same office jobs I'm in now. I was lucky enough to have a book published back in 2016 but my then wife had me go back to the office... I started writing full time last year but low piece rates made it a real grind I had 3 projects I was working on and just needed one to come off and I'd have been writing for a living for at least another year but none did so I'm back where I started.
I just can't face the idea of sitting in an office replying to e-mails, going to meetings and watching the clock for another 30 years. But I have no clue what else there is. I live in Belgium and once every five years you can undertake a subsidized course of career counselling. I did that but the outcome was pretty much "Just look for a job with these words in the title" tried that and, tbh, they all look like I'll be exactly as miserable as I am now. I woke up at 0300hrs this morning and just lay in bed, wide awake, for 3 hours thinking "I have to go back to that place". So now I'm feeling like crap physically as well.
The only thing that keeps me coming here is the money. I'm not even mad for money, I just need to pay the bills. Every day I dream about quitting.
I had a think about what you said and the plan I have hatched is to save as much as I can in the next few months, wait until the end of may when I get my holiday pay (it all gets paid in one lump here, so you get a double pay packet in May) and quit. Between now and then I need to either find a way to live on what I enjoy doing or find a way to make a living that leaves enough time and energy for making progress on that
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brieverton
Player Valuation: £50m
Writing down things has helped for me too. I have written a few letters of complaint being the grump that I am, that once I finished, I didn't need to send as it was rant over. Although people should follow through if they have recieved poor service.
But on occasion I over-egged the impact of whatever was bothering me. Writing things down can help you get a sense of perspective and helps to sweat the small stuff.
In practical terms, I still think the power of the written word can be far more impactful and effective than the spoken.
catcherintherye
Player Valuation: £80m
Both have a place. However writing everything you want to say down is a really useful tool.
I remember when I was a teacher, and if you saw a child was upset, often getting them to right down why would often really help them. It seemed to help the process of reflexivity. A lot of the time, having written it all down, they'd be quite calm about whatever had upset them and in a position to move forward.
As you say, I don't always think sending letters, or emails that helps it's just that concentrating and detailing issues do.
I feel for you but of course I don't know your abilities ( plural) .As I said it is easy sitting here ,I was thinking that if you could think completely outside the box E.G. If you don't like being in an office then be a train driver -I know you might not like it but something you have not previously thought of - try just going through the jobs and pretend you are looking for someone just starting off with no previous experience in anything .
What about a gardener in the summer and write in the winter?
I am sure that there is something out there and it will depend on how much you need to change and what you are prepared to do but clean the slate and start again .My mum wanted me to be an officer in the royal navy and I wanted to be a car mechanic but when I left school we were told to get any job and then if you are not happy change ,I got a job as an apprentice joiner and that was that .
Good luck and remember just because you put up with Everton doesn't mean you do the same with your job .
You said that you will save as much as you can before May ,if you do, try to calculate how much you really do need to manage as it will be handy to know ,I would suggest you could add 10% on top to be safe .
ToffeeRapt
Player Valuation: Free Transfer
Our very own Everton in the Community!
Looked into that mate, currently they're not taking applications for volunteers. Maybe at a later date though.
If you like dogs mate, the likes of the Dogs Trust and RSPCA are always looking for volunteer dog walkers.
Disgruntledgoat
Player Valuation: £50m
If I did that I would end up with about 14 dogs
Zezti
Player Valuation: £70m
Since graduating uni last September, I've not had any luck with getting a job. Thankfully my parents are really supportive but the days are going by and life is generally feeling increasingly fruitless. I've had depression before, and I don't think I'm feeling like that, but it kinda just feels like numbness rather than feeling down. Having nothing to look forward to and also like because I can't find a job that I'm not supposed to feel good about anything in this situation? I think I'm just frustrated at the lack of progression that I thought I would have after uni and I'm anxious at why it is the way it is.
Maybe Everton can give me something to look forward to but we all know not to pin hopes on that
Maybe Everton can give me something to look forward to but we all know not to pin hopes on that
efcforever
Player Valuation: £10m
I remember when I graduated from University in 2005. It brought me down to Earth with a bang. All those opportunities that I was told would be waiting for me didn't seem to be there and there were thousands of graduates just like me all chasing the same jobs. I ended up jumping into the first job I was offered and it made me miserable for 3 years.
Don't beat yourself up for not having found a job yet. My advice would be to take your time and really think about what sort of career you want. This might involve another course of some kind.
Keep us updated and let us know how you get on.
Disgruntledgoat
Player Valuation: £50m
Like @efcforever says, you're at the start of the journey. Don't jump into anything because you're at a point in your life when anything is possible. I graduated uni in 2003, missed out on the job I really wanted, got dumped by first serious girlfriend, made homeless cos I'd just moved in with her and sacked from my fill-in job on the same day... my 22nd birthday.
I went completely off the rails for a while and when I woke up I was cooking and cleaning in a youth hostel in Derbyshire. One of the regrets that I still have 16 years later is that I never gave myself a chance to work out what I actually wanted to do so I just took the first half decent job that came along without trying to do any of the other things I wanted... What you end up doing may be completely different to what you envisaged so be open for anything and you may surprise yourself.
In the meantime, don't put so much pressure on yourself... It's tough out there.
brieverton
Player Valuation: £50m
I had these struggles big time, not least because I was rather a professional student until well into my mid-20s. In retrospect I had the abilities and temperament to persue a career in adademia, but I lacked the self-confidence and network of contacts required.
Being unleashed into reality was harsh. It actually took me the best part of a few years and moving into and out of jobs to feel somewhat settled, although for me at least I didn't arrive at a final destination that I would properly call "settled" as such, and that's one of lifes realities for most people career-wise I think, that you come to accept. Graduates, particularly those in vocational subjects like law and medicine may have it easier, but the reality is much more muddled for everyone else.
It helped for me to distinguish between jobs that I had to do and were necessary to pay the bills, and other jobs that I could apply for, maybe at the moment or in the future, that I felt maybe more befitted my "status", as a graduate/postgraduate. You already realise, wisely, that people don't fawn over those with university degrees anymore, nor did they in the 1990s when I graduated.
One of the things I've learned it that its important not to associate identity and self-worth with whatever it is you need to do to pay those bills.
If you can get a job which gives you a foot in the door some place or even if its not related to what you would ultimately like to do, you'll have several benefits from the off 1) Money 2) A sense of purpose 3) Opportunities to network 4) It's always easier to get a job when you're in a job, however unrelated, minor, or insignificant that current job is in your mind.
You will get there, it takes a bit of plodding around, some persistence and a bit of luck but see what you can do for yourself in the here and now jobs-wise and things will take a momentum of their own.