JimmyJeffers
Player Valuation: £70m
Would like him to branch out to other parts of the forum. His relentless Everton chat is a bit repetitive.
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- Thread starter The T-Dex
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A font of knowledge about our beautiful club… a more learned poster about Everton you couldn’t wish to find.
tommye
Player Valuation: £100m
I've never noticed the fella.
Benefit of rarely venturing anywhere near the Everton forum I guess.
Tommy Chong
Player Valuation: £60m
Wowzers Thomas! You are a lucky lad...OK, so I'm on callout for work, this involves providing emergency cover for social housing group, plumbing board ups locksmith etc etc.
Anyway gets a callout one night just after midnight for a board up in Fazak.
All the front downstairs windows caved in on a house. So gets there and there's 6 windows to board up, there was also 2 cars on the drive which had been smashed up, not my problem.
So, remove all the smashed units, board up and measure up for new double glazing, says my goodbyes to those in the house and gets back in my van.
We have order forms we need to fill out for the double glazing so, as per usual, I start filling the form in. Got my door open about a foot to keep the interior light on while I do what I'm doing.
As I'm doing this a car pulls up outside the house behind me and the lad comes out of his house and approaches the car chatting to whoever it was, I'm taking not much notice. Then I hears these 3 loud bangs and automatically think it's fireworks. So looks around, sees nothing, so cracks on with the form.
Lad has vanished but again, not taking much notice, just kinda in my eyeline.
Finishes writing the form out and heads off to another callout in Kensington.
Pulls up outside the 2nd job and gets out the van, big hole in the door. Instantly recognised as what can only be a bullet hole. Opens my door and there on the inside panel of the door are 2 bullet holes, 1 going straight through, the other going straight into my door speaker.
Police, malarkey, etc etc.
The 3 bangs were gunshots apparently aimed at the lad out the house. 1 hit the pavement and the other 2 hit the inside of my van door about 8" away from my leg.
Will dig the pics out in a bit when I get a chance
I suppose you can have a laugh now, considering you didn't know what was happening at the time!
One for the books... Lol.
What do you reckon? Those lads must have been doing something dodgy, and it all went south?
Oh, he's knowledgeable alright....
Just not about Everton.
tommye
Player Valuation: £100m
Police said later it was a drug gang feud.Wowzers Thomas! You are a lucky lad...
I suppose you can have a laugh now, considering you didn't know what was happening at the time!
One for the books... Lol.
What do you reckon? Those lads must have been doing something dodgy, and it all went south?
I laughed about it at the time tbh, probably the shock of what could've happened.
Funniest bit was when I phoned my boss to tell him while I waited for the police.
Been shot at mate...
Ye what?
Been shot at, not me specifically I don't think, but the van has bullet holes in and the popo wanna take it away.
Oh ffs...
I know, lucky eh...
No, oh ffs I've spent all that money and the knobheads missed!!!
Thanks Paul.
Love you too.
Tommy Chong
Player Valuation: £60m
Insane mate! It looks like you were in an episode of CSI.
Did one of the coppers go: Aye sir, it looks the bullet missed the lad by 8 inches!
And did the CO respond by taking out his aviator Ray-Bans and, while putting them on slowing, say something daft like: Well then, I guess people in glass houses shouldn't throw rocks.
I'm kidding, mate! I'm glad you come out of it in one piece.Never heard that word before, off to look it up
tommye
Player Valuation: £100m
I was too busy stressing over whether they could smell I'd had a spliffInsane mate! It looks like you were in an episode of CSI.
Did one of the coppers go: Aye sir, it looks the bullet missed the lad by 8 inches!
And did the CO respond by taking out his aviator Ray-Bans and, while putting them on slowing, say something daft like: Well then, I guess people in glass houses shouldn't throw rocks.
Bet it took you longer to stash all your paraphernalia, than it took plod to take your statement.
Bryan+
Player Valuation: £10m
GrassOK, so I'm on callout for work, this involves providing emergency cover for social housing group, plumbing board ups locksmith etc etc.
Anyway gets a callout one night just after midnight for a board up in Fazak.
All the front downstairs windows caved in on a house. So gets there and there's 6 windows to board up, there was also 2 cars on the drive which had been smashed up, not my problem.
So, remove all the smashed units, board up and measure up for new double glazing, says my goodbyes to those in the house and gets back in my van.
We have order forms we need to fill out for the double glazing so, as per usual, I start filling the form in. Got my door open about a foot to keep the interior light on while I do what I'm doing.
As I'm doing this a car pulls up outside the house behind me and the lad comes out of his house and approaches the car chatting to whoever it was, I'm taking not much notice. Then I hears these 3 loud bangs and automatically think it's fireworks. So looks around, sees nothing, so cracks on with the form.
Lad has vanished but again, not taking much notice, just kinda in my eyeline.
Finishes writing the form out and heads off to another callout in Kensington.
Pulls up outside the 2nd job and gets out the van, big hole in the door. Instantly recognised as what can only be a bullet hole. Opens my door and there on the inside panel of the door are 2 bullet holes, 1 going straight through, the other going straight into my door speaker.
Police, malarkey, etc etc.
The 3 bangs were gunshots apparently aimed at the lad out the house. 1 hit the pavement and the other 2 hit the inside of my van door about 8" away from my leg.
Will dig the pics out in a bit when I get a chance
I know when you're at your ma's. So they must of known.
Last edited:
Tommy Chong
Player Valuation: £60m
Even if they do smell it, just maintain and keep a cool head…
If you sell it well enough, they’ll buy it.
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