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Krakow

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Go somewhere where the sun is shining, the beers are ice cold and the women are tanned and well up for it.

You know what Im talking about.

*hugs a Koala
 
Im back. What a filthy weekend. I wanna be sick just thinking about it. Had an amazing time. The Poles do not like the English though, no matter how friendly you are to them. We couldnt get in some clubs just because of this. But we found this amazing place called Kitsch, there wasnt even any door policy/ entrance fee, anyone could just walk in. We left at about 5 on the friday and at 8:30am on the saturday- and the place was still bouncing!! I got so drunk and just walked off on the thursday and ended up getting lost around Krakow by myself for 3 hours. I was so afraid. And I thought every building was a castle, and everyone who got a phonecall new about it. On the friday me and my mate left together, we were walking down a street singing and just being obnoxious but not threatening, there wasnt anyone around as we were (stupidly) walking through a park, we were just having a good time, and then the polish police turned up. Oh my god. I have never been so scared. He grabbed me by the throat, shouted about me being '****ing English' raised his batton at me, then just randomly let me go. Grabbed my mate, did the same thing, then got us to pick a plastic bottle off the floor and put it in the bin. Then let us go. I have never been so sorry in my life. They are ****ing scum though. Then we both got lost around Krakow again, for about 2 hours. Ended up in the grounds of some manor house, have no idea how we got back. On the last night we just all had a fantastic time, no trouble, even the poles took a liking to us, especially my mate who was wearing a corset for a forfit and we just had a great night. Not to say we didnt on the previous two nights, its just they all ended rather badly! The polish girls are great, and tended to take a shine to us which was cool :) Except on one night my mate got lost and ended up thinking it was a good idea to go where these 2 girls on the street took him. He ended up in some empty bar, where they tried giving him this drink, he had one sip and the only way to describe it was 'it tasted like the dentist'. So they obv tried to drug him. The barman then said he had to pay for it, which came to about the equivalent of 50 quid. When he got his wallet out, the girl tried to take more money. When he refused, a massive bouncer walked down the staires. So he had to give in. At least he got out alive though.

So to sum up, we had a great time, but to anyone who wants to go to these Eastern European places, be warned. They will try and mug you off. And dont be a [Poor language removed] in the streets, the police will ****ing kill you. The only reason we are alive is because we were apologetic and are generally nice lads anyway and did exactly what he told us to do.

The English have a bad rep, I mean yeah we sing loudly, we're obnoxious. We maybe get a bit naughty with eachother occasionally. But at least we're not ****in' pure evil like some of the Eastern Europeans are. The police especially are just another gang. Definatly have to be careful out there boys and girls.

But I would reccomend Krakow. Was a great laugh!!!
 
It's Eastern Europe mate, it's the thing there. Moody bars with sex shows that have a tariff about twenty times the normal. Spiking, bad moody police who want to beat the living sh*te out of you and boss looking birds who wouldn't think twice of stealing your kidney with a scalpel as soon as you drift off.

But it's your fault all the hostility, the English before you have caused it.
 

Reidy's Bottle Of Grecian said:
it's known as the city of knives, their derby is a right ding dong.
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Yeah we were going to go to see Wisla play. Bought the tickets thinking it was on Saturday. Got to the stadium which was right near the hostel, noone there, we were like oops, looked at the dates and found out it was on the Sunday. Bit gutted.

The Cracovia and Wisla stadiums are soooo close. Closer than Goodison and Anfield. And theres a park in between. Bet its a blood bath come derby day.
 
Who wants to see the video me and my mate made of our expedition to Krakow a few weeks ago. Our mate had to do a forfit for removing a tag on facebook. So here it is :) I apologise for our southerness! It is a laugh though. Enjoy! The ending is timed to perfection, we couldnt believe it haha

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByrVdYIPKSg
 
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RadioFriendlyUnitShifter said:
"Sh*tlad productions".


Haha.


Shame about all the cockneys, like!
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Haha we're nice, very drunk cockneys. When my mates like 'then I told her I was 6'... lol what a d*ck. Love him. And I found out were walking with these 2 lads and their ukranian, the first thing that comes into my head to say is 'erm obviously obviously... schevchenko'. Good times.
 

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