Bob Elstone
Player Valuation: £35m
I heard today that Lukaku and Stones both decided to stay because they were told we're selling up. Not only will they be getting monster pay raises but we'll also be signing three or four 20m+ players in the summer for a push (the deal won't be on until after the window closes). The board are hoping for at least a Europa League spot to help them attract top talent and hit the ground running post-takeover.
They also plan on an honour guard for Kenwright when we play Norwich at the end of the season
Heard from who?