Everton sale announced Dec. 31, 2015.
Lukaku and Deulofeu to Barcelona for 40m.
Stones to Chelsea for 30m.
Barkley to Manchester City for 25m.
Tim Howard appointed captain for life.
Martinez sacked and Leon Osman named interim player-manager.
Gareth Barry DNA submitted to Chinese clone factory.
Mume Besic banned from football for life for horror tackle on Payet during the off season.
Goodison demolished to make way for pineapple factory.
Toffees build new underground stadium with the entrance in the literal shadow of Anfield.
Everton win the league in 2033 as 18 year old Gaz Baz Army leads the league in yellow card accumulation and fewest goals conceded.
Tony Hibbert retires.