Anyway ......one of the Fancy Bears hacked into Benitez's computer and had a little look around to see if he could pick up some tactical insight or details of potential new signings ......well nothing doing there unsuprisingly.
However he did find out that dear old RB is writing a diary of his time at Everton .
Fascinating , right , well here's a few extracts ......
30 June - well today's the day. After weeks of discussions at Everton they finally agreed. Can't believe it myself. Great work by GB on that fan's forum , they are only 70% against me now. So finished the video interview after GB told me what to say and off for dinner at La Bandera.
3 July - met Marcel for lunch at El Gato Negro . Tapas very good. At the end of the meal I told him to bring in Countinho . He told me that we have to sell Richarlison first. Pooped into Greggs for a couple of sausage rolls on the way home to cheer myself up.
4 July - met up with GB over a meal at Lunya to discuss the next round of my charm offensive on GOT.
5 July - 1st day of pre season training. My god this lot are hopeless. I should have demanded more money , £9m a year insn't nearly enough for me to get my hands dirty with this lot. Gylfi gave me a lovely greeting as I turned up though. I think I'll make him captain. The canteen at FF is good and had a 3 course meal. Went to dinner at La Tasca
5 July - James at training. Haven't seen him for a while but he is almost as good looking as me. Not sure why but he gave me a dirty look. Marcel says we need to sell Mina. Not sure who she is. Slap up meal with Bill tonight , I need to win him over . Going to El Pecado , told Bill I will pay but I will put it on expenses.
6 July - Lovely meal with Bill but wow is he boring. Going on about someone called Hickson all night. I'll look him up and suggest to Marcel that we buy him. Going to try Esto Es Espana tonight - I always get a warm welcome and double portions there. Must meet up with GB to see how it's going on GOT.