Secret work enemies

[JimmyJeffers]

I got told about a new legend recently. On lunch, he gets out a whole loaf of sliced bread from his locker, with a tub of marmalade. Gets a large spoon, scoops it out of the jar, whacks it on the bread and eats it

And I witnessed it today, it was as weird as I hoped

Yes, he is under 30 and he has a ponytail

Is it plain white bread? Absolute hero. DO NOT make him angry though. Clearly cares about nothing. Admire from a distance

 

[Nymzee]

I got told about a new legend recently. On lunch, he gets out a whole loaf of sliced bread from his locker, with a tub of marmalade. Gets a large spoon, scoops it out of the jar, whacks it on the bread and eats it

And I witnessed it today, it was as weird as I hoped

Yes, he is under 30 and he has a ponytail

Question: how many slices per lunch break?

 

[coollino]

Question: how many slices per lunch break?

Apparently around 4, but it's normally peanut butter

I refuse to sit in the office for my lunch so I'll probably never know for sure

 

[Rita_Poon]

Apparently around 4, but it's normally peanut butter

I refuse to sit in the office for my lunch so I'll probably never know for sure

4 rounds of peanut butter? 2 litres of what to manage through?

 

[coollino]

Is it plain white bread? Absolute hero. DO NOT make him angry though. Clearly cares about nothing. Admire from a distance

There is a rumour that he has chicken and mushroom risotto for breakfast too hahaha

Now I did see some like beige thing in a plastic box, but it must be porridge with some dried fruit or something

 

[Rita_Poon]

There is a rumour that he has chicken and mushroom risotto for breakfast too hahaha

Now I did see some like beige thing in a plastic box, but it must be porridge with some dried fruit or something

On top of the loaf and marmalade and the peanut butter twist, this kids diet seems a bit of a thing for hushed tones and silent looks...

Why the infatuation? I sense there's more here jury...

 

[DavidH]

If you like marmalade and you're not a bear in a flashers jacket then you're a proper weirdo.

 

[ArtetaMoney]

Finally got one at my new place, he's a proper bellend. Tries to talk to me about footy all the time, even though he's a Palace fan.

Thinks he's funny as well, but isn't (he actually might be, but I'd never laugh at any of his jokes cos I can't stand him).

I only really had a couple when I was in the RAF, one of them was my old boss who I hated, he messaged me on LinkedIn a few months ago asking for some advice about finding a job when leaving. In an unfortunate (for him) turnaround of power, I left him on read and blocked him.

 

[tonyhorne]

Having read through this thread, I have just realised that, in my last place of work, I was everybody's secret work enemy.

Never regretted leaving but am now really glad I did ...

 

[Yarrgh]

Having read through this thread, I have just realised that, in my last place of work, I was everybody's secret work enemy.

Never regretted leaving but am now really glad I did ...

Hang around long enough and you become the enemy.

 

[coollino]

Having read through this thread, I have just realised that, in my last place of work, I was everybody's secret work enemy.

Never regretted leaving but am now really glad I did ...

Don't worry, everyone has been that person (apart from me)

 

[Billy Dean]

Used to love drawing little mustaches and specs on photos in Newspapers the staffroom at one place I worked. A very highbrow institution that perhaps took itself too seriously. Occasionally a Wang or tits. Used to love hearing people's reactions. A couple of folk used to get proper upset. It was addressed in an all staff meeting once. I nearly died laughing.

My very first job was a hornets nest of awful senior management and absolute irreverent loonies.

One lad Used to sneak into people's offices and draw a massive cock on the whiteboard if he knew they had a visitor. They'd arrive and have to explain it. We'd be in the corridor sniggering.

The other great game there was defacing the awful posters acting as newsletters that were put up around the factory floor. Beaming pics of the senior management would soon find thenselves adorned with Hitler moustaches.

Mischief is a good thing. Embrace it.

I might start doing some of these things where I work

 

[Kurt.]

Think that person is currently me recently started my job, October, and am their line manager. Everyone is being super nice to me every time they see me and it makes me feel uncomfortable… nobody likes management that much ffs

 

[tim gabbott]

Amber, one of seniors… Christ knows how she got a job in an outdoor activity centre…. She weighs about 20 stone, never showers, her t-shirts are always covered in dinner medals, she wears leggings that make her look like her arse is on back to front, she has more chins that a Chinese phone book and her beard is better than mine… she never cooks, cleans or washes up and is most probably the most lazy person I’ve ever met… and she constantly talks about her painful periods, likes to fart as loud as she can in front of the kids in our care as she thinks it’s funny and also has to describe in detail what type of morning dump she’s had every day… an absolute tragic waste of healthy organs… so glad I’m leaving

Why did you marry her in the first place..

 

[Kurt.]

Why did you marry her in the first place..

So we could make you son xx