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The Oldies Thread



….weights for sash windows;

View attachment 271852
Sash Weights?
...
BARKER: Got any plugs?
CORBETT: Plugs. What kind of plugs?
BARKER: A rubber one, bathroom.
(Ronnie Corbett gets out a box of bath plugs, and places it on the counter)
CORBETT (pulling out two different sized plugs): What size?
BARKER: Thirteen amp!
 
Football rules when we were kids.
1. - The fatty was always the goalkeeper
2. - The game ended when everyone was tired
3. - Even if the score was 20-0 whoever scored last won.
4. - No referee.
5. - Give a foul only if it was very clear or someone started to cry.
6. - There was no such thing as offside
7. - If the owner of the ball got angry, the match was over.
8. - The two best players couldn't be on the same team and they knew that too.
9. - If you were chosen last, it was a big humiliation, it meant nobody wanted you.
10. - you even played 2-3 hours in a row.
11. - The match was stopped when an elderly man passed by
12. - Neighborhood players were enemies forever.
13. - Those who had no idea about football remained reserves or at maximum defenders.
14. - When the big ones were playing, you had to leave the field without protesting.
15. -There was always a neighbor who wouldn’t let you play and threatened you to take the ball and put it inside.
16. - If there was a bet, the game was very serious as if it were a final.
17. - The goals were two rocks or two jackets, but there was always a team with the smaller goal.
18. - When the goalkeeper was pushed, the goal was invalid.
19. - The rules were established before the match even started.
20. - If it was a penalty, remove the fat one and the best one goalkeeper would appear.
 

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