Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[Barnfred 55]

How ya doing mate hope you're ok ,must be so hard to filter everything the process of organising everything funeral and so forth can't be easy .keep posting on here after the funeral it helped me .

Cheers mate. Yeah, it's still very raw tbh, but I'm just taking things day by day and I feel like I'm getting there.

Had a call from the coroner yesterday to confirm that they have finished with her and that she's ready to be taken into the care of the funeral directors. He confirmed that she (short version) had a massive heart attack and would have known nothing about it at all. In his words, it was just like turning off the light switch. He also confirmed that even had she died in hospital in an ICU, they wouldn't have been able to save her. So it gives me great comfort that she wouldn't have experienced any pain, and also that I couldn't have done anything personally that may have changed the outcome. It was just her time I guess.

There's an added complication in that, because she died at sea, registration of her death needs to go through the maritime office in Cardiff. But the coroner has sent them her details so they'll hopefully contact me early next week. Of course I need the death certificate before I can do so much of the paperwork. At least the date for the funeral can be set and I'm speaking to the funeral directors on Tuesday to go through things in detail.

I'm getting plenty of support from friends and neighbours. The young couple next door made me a vegan lasagne big enough to feed a family of six, and I'm going to have a go at that tonight. To compensate I'm just about to treat myself to a full English . But it's good that I'm starting to get my appetite back. Losing a few pounds won't do me any harm though.

Overall I'm doing better than expected and managing to keep myself occupied. It's the little things that kick me off but I guess that will get a bit better with time. Thanks again to everyone for all your support and kind words.

 

[messymascot]

Cheers mate. Yeah, it's still very raw tbh, but I'm just taking things day by day and I feel like I'm getting there.

Had a call from the coroner yesterday to confirm that they have finished with her and that she's ready to be taken into the care of the funeral directors. He confirmed that she (short version) had a massive heart attack and would have known nothing about it at all. In his words, it was just like turning off the light switch. He also confirmed that even had she died in hospital in an ICU, they wouldn't have been able to save her. So it gives me great comfort that she wouldn't have experienced any pain, and also that I couldn't have done anything personally that may have changed the outcome. It was just her time I guess.

There's an added complication in that, because she died at sea, registration of her death needs to go through the maritime office in Cardiff. But the coroner has sent them her details so they'll hopefully contact me early next week. Of course I need the death certificate before I can do so much of the paperwork. At least the date for the funeral can be set and I'm speaking to the funeral directors on Tuesday to go through things in detail.

I'm getting plenty of support from friends and neighbours. The young couple next door made me a vegan lasagne big enough to feed a family of six, and I'm going to have a go at that tonight. To compensate I'm just about to treat myself to a full English . But it's good that I'm starting to get my appetite back. Losing a few pounds won't do me any harm though.

Overall I'm doing better than expected and managing to keep myself occupied. It's the little things that kick me off but I guess that will get a bit better with time. Thanks again to everyone for all your support and kind words.

You look after yourself everyone is in your corner. Can't beat a full English breakfast.

 

[Barnfred 55]

You look after yourself everyone is in your corner. Can't beat a full English breakfast.

Burnt the sausage and the bacon. Looking forward to my quorn tea now. At least it won't be burnt. I mean, how much damage can I do with a microwave?

 

[messymascot]

Burnt the sausage and the bacon. Looking forward to my quorn tea now. At least it won't be burnt. I mean, how much damage can I do with a microwave?

I prefer mine burnt or were they absolute cinders? Did they tell you how long to leave it in for? If they haven't just heat it one minute at a time and you should be able to tell.

 

[Barnfred 55]

I prefer mine burnt or were they absolute cinders? Did they tell you how long to leave it in for? If they haven't just heat it one minute at a time and you should be able to tell.

No they were edible mate. Just not quite up to the standard I have become accustomed to. And I'm fine with a microwave. I was just jesting. Helps me cope.

 

[Sassy Colombian]

Cheers mate. Yeah, it's still very raw tbh, but I'm just taking things day by day and I feel like I'm getting there.

Had a call from the coroner yesterday to confirm that they have finished with her and that she's ready to be taken into the care of the funeral directors. He confirmed that she (short version) had a massive heart attack and would have known nothing about it at all. In his words, it was just like turning off the light switch. He also confirmed that even had she died in hospital in an ICU, they wouldn't have been able to save her. So it gives me great comfort that she wouldn't have experienced any pain, and also that I couldn't have done anything personally that may have changed the outcome. It was just her time I guess.

There's an added complication in that, because she died at sea, registration of her death needs to go through the maritime office in Cardiff. But the coroner has sent them her details so they'll hopefully contact me early next week. Of course I need the death certificate before I can do so much of the paperwork. At least the date for the funeral can be set and I'm speaking to the funeral directors on Tuesday to go through things in detail.

I'm getting plenty of support from friends and neighbours. The young couple next door made me a vegan lasagne big enough to feed a family of six, and I'm going to have a go at that tonight. To compensate I'm just about to treat myself to a full English . But it's good that I'm starting to get my appetite back. Losing a few pounds won't do me any harm though.

Overall I'm doing better than expected and managing to keep myself occupied. It's the little things that kick me off but I guess that will get a bit better with time. Thanks again to everyone for all your support and kind words.

Doing better than expected is good and it must be comforting to know your wife experienced no pain or agony while she was leaving, if there is a such a things as perfect way to go I would say that’s one.

It is very nice that your family and neighbors have been offering support and tasty food. Sometimes when we go through hard times we forget to nourish our bodies correctly so a vegan lasagna sounds perfect to help with that

 

[messymascot]

No they were edible mate. Just not quite up to the standard I have become accustomed to. And I'm fine with a microwave. I was just jesting. Helps me cope.

You might be jesting but I know sometimes I've got it wrong that's how I know the one minute trick. I have a very dark humour at times so I'm glad your letting it help you.

 

[Gwladysover]

Burnt the sausage and the bacon. Looking forward to my quorn tea now. At least it won't be burnt. I mean, how much damage can I do with a microwave?

Wouldn’t bank on it - I once set fire to a mince pie in a microwave ?. Seriously though good to know that you are getting there. Take it easy. ?

 

[Barnfred 55]

Doing better than expected is good and it must be comforting to know your wife experienced no pain or agony while she was leaving, if there is a such a things as perfect way to go I would say that’s one.

It is very nice that your family and neighbors have been offering support and tasty food. Sometimes when we go through hard times we forget to nourish our bodies correctly so a vegan lasagna sounds perfect to help with that

I'm not sure about it sounding perfect, but despite my jesting I am very grateful too them, and am looking forward to having a portion with a nice glass of red wine tonight Sass.

 

[Sassy Colombian]

Burnt the sausage and the bacon. Looking forward to my quorn tea now. At least it won't be burnt. I mean, how much damage can I do with a microwave?

I can do a lot of damage to my skin with my stove and oven

 

[Sassy Colombian]

Wouldn’t bank on it - I once set fire to a mince pie in a microwave ?. Seriously though good to know that you are getting there. Take it easy. ?

Thank goodness I have no microwave because I probably would have set mine on fire ? I love cooking but I’m super clumsy in the kitchen

 

[Gwladysover]

Thank goodness I have no microwave because I probably would have set mine on fire ? I love cooking but I’m super clumsy in the kitchen

Me too, managed to burn my wrist at lunchtime taking pizza out of the oven.

 

[Sassy Colombian]

I'm not sure about it sounding perfect, but despite my jesting I am very grateful too them, and am looking forward to having a portion with a nice glass of red wine tonight Sass.

Their gesture was perfect May you enjoy the vegan lasagna and glass of red wine tonight, Fred ?

 

[Sassy Colombian]

Me too, managed to burn my wrist at lunchtime taking pizza out of the oven.

I have so many small scars on my wrists, hands and fingers from all different burns

 

[Earwigjoe]

Hi @Tangledupinblue are you a Dylan fan. Everytime I see your name, you get me singing to myself. Everton and Dylan good mix mate.