2023/24 Dele

[roydo]

And what if you can't afford to get help?

The NHS have a mental health arm, granted, over stretched. If he still has an addiction issue, there are plenty of volunteer organisations available. Sure, as a rich young man, he can bypass that, but the central issue returns; you either respond to help, or you dont.

I know that from personal experience. Over a 10 week series of consultations with a therapist, my partners issues were largely sorted; £500 all in, topped up with a few NHS sessions. (Not all that if I am honest).

 

[Frenk]

It's a tough one, I feel for the fella and hope there is a chance he can find his form again, he would definitely be worth the £10 million we would have to pay out.

 

[HowardsWay]

The NHS have a mental health arm, granted, over stretched. If he still has an addiction issue, there are plenty of volunteer organisations available. Sure, as a rich young man, he can bypass that, but the central issue returns; you either respond to help, or you dont.

I know that from personal experience. Over a 10 week series of consultations with a therapist, my partners issues were largely sorted; £500 all in, topped up with a few NHS sessions. (Not all that if I am honest).

Roydo... I am sorry that you needed help in this respect. I hope that the treatment you got and hopefully will continue to get has helped and will help you.

NHS - While my experience of the NHS has mostly been excellent, I'd say it isn't the best for mental health issues. You mention the sum of 500 quid which for some is still out of reach and for others more manageable. However, there are still loads of people who see this as a stigma and will never seek treatment. In the case of Dele, I would suggest he has more options open to him than the majority of people.

 

[roydo]

Roydo... I am sorry that you needed help in this respect. I hope that the treatment you got and hopefully will continue to get has helped and will help you.

NHS - While my experience of the NHS has mostly been excellent, I'd say it isn't the best for mental health issues. You mention the sum of 500 quid which for some is still out of reach and for others more manageable. However, there are still loads of people who see this as a stigma and will never seek treatment. In the case of Dele, I would suggest he has more options open to him than the majority of people.

It was my partner, but we did it together. That said, since she went to heaven, I have leant on what we learned. Thing is, if someone has mental health/addiction issues, and they do not address them, they are unlikely to respond to help anyrate.

Tony Adams hasnt drunk a drop for probably 30 years. Team mate Paul Merson still cannot kick his gambling issue, (apparently). It is complicated, chemically induced in the brain, and wealth plays little part in that.

 

[pfim]

Some fair points such as trauma isn't a straight line and I never said it was. I'd argue the point about being irrelevant though.

As a football club, we should be looking to sign players who can improve our team and who don't come with any baggage that can affect that. I know that sounds harsh to say but the reality is that this is a multi-million/billion pound business and there is little room for sentiment. Sorry if that offends.

The reality is for some folks like me, we should never have signed him... a) because his best days were behind him and b) because he has played 13 times in two years and mostly as a sub.

I'd also argue with your comment that "being wealthy brings expectation and responsibility" to some extent. Dele signed for us knowing his own background and feelings. He'd had a bad period in his career and possibly thought he could play his way out of it. On the other hand, he may have just thought it was another pay check. None of us will know. As a footballer there is responsibility and expectation and I'd suggest that Dele failed us in the period until he did that interview. Outside of football, there are plenty of wealthy individuals who shun responsibility and expectation.

You are right, the club should have never signed him. But that's on the club, not Dele.

He doesn't bear any more responsibility as a footballer than anyone else in life.

 

[Marius57]

The poster in question also stated that he performed for Tottenham and although he didn't exactly say it, was, IMO, implying that he had the same deep rooted issues there that didn't seem to affect him in the way it has at Everton.

Perhaps we just bring things out in people?

But, I think it's fair enough to question his mindset earlier in his career to later and then why Everton took the gamble to sign him?

Frankly, I think we signed him because he was a big name at one time and it would appease the majority of fans. I also understand that mental illness can be deep rooted and take decades to come to the surface.

You are entirely missing the point again about how trauma recovery isn’t a straight line and it can surface/resurface at any time.

The fact you still think it’s then ok to question his mindset earlier in his career to later, shows you really don’t understand it or don’t believe it.

 

[HowardsWay]

You are entirely missing the point again about how trauma recovery isn’t a straight line and it can surface/resurface at any time.

The fact you still think it’s then ok to question his mindset earlier in his career to later, shows you really don’t understand it or don’t believe it.

Stop being dense.

 

[HowardsWay]

It was my partner, but we did it together. That said, since she went to heaven, I have leant on what we learned. Thing is, if someone has mental health/addiction issues, and they do not address them, they are unlikely to respond to help anyrate.

Tony Adams hasnt drunk a drop for probably 30 years. Team mate Paul Merson still cannot kick his gambling issue, (apparently). It is complicated, chemically induced in the brain, and wealth plays little part in that.

Again, sorry to hear more of your background.

I'm not going to dwell on this any further other than to say that wealth can most certainly play a part in addiction. A lack of wealth can deny opportunities for treatment as much as having wealth can enable.

 

[roydo]

Again, sorry to hear more of your background.

I'm not going to dwell on this any further other than to say that wealth can most certainly play a part in addiction. A lack of wealth can deny opportunities for treatment as much as having wealth can enable.

Its not been a secret, but way before your time here. Search threads titled Roydo Support, (not started by me), and you will get a better picture if you like.

Wealthy or not, if you dont want help, or dont respond, thats you cooked. Wealth has no part in that.

 

[HowardsWay]

Its not been a secret, but way before your time here. Search threads titled Roydo Support, (not started by me), and you will get a better picture if you like.

Wealthy or not, if you dont want help, or dont respond, thats you cooked. Wealth has no part in that.

I disagree with your last statement Roydo because I think differently. I totally respect your opinion though and wish you the best. I'm not going to comment further in this thread in regard to the state of Dele's mental health as I wish to respect the thoughts and opinions of others who see things differently.

 

[Marius57]

Stop being dense.

Maybe just go and educate yourself around childhood trauma and then you may understand why I’m not the one being dense.

 

[roydo]

I disagree with your last statement Roydo because I think differently. I totally respect your opinion though and wish you the best. I'm not going to comment further in this thread in regard to the state of Dele's mental health as I wish to respect the thoughts and opinions of others who see things differently.

I am fine mate.

But if you think wealth somehow insulates you from mental health/addiction, well, cant help you I am afraid.

It is akin to saying rich people cant break a leg.

 

[HowardsWay]

I am fine mate.

But if you think wealth somehow insulates you from mental health/addiction, well, cant help you I am afraid.

It is akin to saying rich people cant break a leg.

No, no, no... please don't think I'm saying it insulates you. I'm just saying it gives you more options.
Just did the search and so sorry for what you have been through and wish you the best.

 

[pfim]

I would assume most of us are not qualified to comment on anyone's mental health, and if we were, I would at the same time assume most of us have never spoken to Dele Alli in order to comment on it.

 

[roydo]

No, no, no... please don't think I'm saying it insulates you. I'm just saying it gives you more options.
Just did the search and so sorry for what you have been through and wish you the best.

Saw that you did. So you now have a clue where I was coming from.

Wealth gives you more options, obvs. But it isnt down to that.

Anyrate, I appreciate your wishes, and fair play for you bothering to search!

COYB later.