2023/24 Dele

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roy vernon said:
Spot on, thankfully very few of us will have been through the kind of torment Dele has, I think he has shown great courage in going public with it and the notion that his people have invented it to garner sympathy is, quite frankly odious. From a footballing point of view, I don't think he will ever get back to anything like the player he once was, but, what an immense emotional burden he has to carry. It really isn't surprising he got himself into such a dark place over the past few years.
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I can say, with almost certainty, that he will have felt an immense feeling of shame because of what happened to him. To talk about it, and publicly, will be painful.

His issues with substance abuse will be a direct result of the trauma, and that itself is something incredibly hard to deal with before resolving the root cause.

And let's be clear, nobody forced us to sign him - we did it of our own will. At that point, we sign a contract where we have a moral responsibility to protect him.

In an ideal world, it would have worked out perfectly, but it didn't; nobody could have foreseen this, and ultimately we (like Dele) have to play the cards we're given.

Maybe he will become good, maybe he won't. Unless we support him, the chances of the former will continue to be slim, so those moaning should get behind it.

Away from him personally, while I can't and won't talk about specific examples or cases, some of the trauma adults and children go through is beyond the pale.

People live with this burden and have to try to reintroduce themselves to society the best they can, and it's only made harder when knobs don't show compassion.
 
PhilM said:
I can say, with almost certainty, that he will have felt an immense feeling of shame because of what happened to him. To talk about it, and publicly, will be painful.

His issues with substance abuse will be a direct result of the trauma, and that itself is something incredibly hard to deal with before resolving the root cause.

And let's be clear, nobody forced us to sign him - we did it of our own will. At that point, we sign a contract where we have a moral responsibility to protect him.

In an ideal world, it would have worked out perfectly, but it didn't; nobody could have foreseen this, and ultimately we (like Dele) have to play the cards we're given.

Maybe he will become good, maybe he won't. Unless we support him, the chances of the former will continue to be slim, so those moaning should get behind it.

Away from him personally, while I can't and won't talk about specific examples or cases, some of the trauma adults and children go through is beyond the pale.

People live with this burden and have to try to reintroduce themselves to society the best they can, and it's only made harder when knobs don't show compassion.
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Some excellent posts mate. Like you, I work professionally with people who have gone through horrific trauma, specifically with children. The amount of stuff that goes on that the general public don’t tend to think about is awful. It’s still very much taboo (until it hits the political sphere and they hear about the 1 case being used for political gain).

I don’t blame people for being ignorant about it (as let’s face it, it’s not a nice topic and it challenges your belief in what people are capable of), but it’s those who double down on that when it’s been called out and people have written lots to explain the impacts of trauma but they refuse to acknowledge or believe it.
 
PhilM said:
I can say, with almost certainty, that he will have felt an immense feeling of shame because of what happened to him. To talk about it, and publicly, will be painful.

His issues with substance abuse will be a direct result of the trauma, and that itself is something incredibly hard to deal with before resolving the root cause.

And let's be clear, nobody forced us to sign him - we did it of our own will. At that point, we sign a contract where we have a moral responsibility to protect him.

In an ideal world, it would have worked out perfectly, but it didn't; nobody could have foreseen this, and ultimately we (like Dele) have to play the cards we're given.

Maybe he will become good, maybe he won't. Unless we support him, the chances of the former will continue to be slim, so those moaning should get behind it.

Away from him personally, while I can't and won't talk about specific examples or cases, some of the trauma adults and children go through is beyond the pale.

People live with this burden and have to try to reintroduce themselves to society the best they can, and it's only made harder when knobs don't show compassion.
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At least he's got a shed load of money to help him get through the tough times.

We can all take comfort in that.
 
PhilM said:
I can say, with almost certainty, that he will have felt an immense feeling of shame because of what happened to him. To talk about it, and publicly, will be painful.

His issues with substance abuse will be a direct result of the trauma, and that itself is something incredibly hard to deal with before resolving the root cause.

And let's be clear, nobody forced us to sign him - we did it of our own will. At that point, we sign a contract where we have a moral responsibility to protect him.

In an ideal world, it would have worked out perfectly, but it didn't; nobody could have foreseen this, and ultimately we (like Dele) have to play the cards we're given.

Maybe he will become good, maybe he won't. Unless we support him, the chances of the former will continue to be slim, so those moaning should get behind it.

Away from him personally, while I can't and won't talk about specific examples or cases, some of the trauma adults and children go through is beyond the pale.

People live with this burden and have to try to reintroduce themselves to society the best they can, and it's only made harder when knobs don't show compassion.
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It honestly beggars belief that there's so many cranks on here (@royvernon39 isnt alone) who seem to think he has absolutely no excuse NOT to tear it up like he was in his early days at Spurs.

He suffered some sort of traumatic abuse as a child (it's irrelevant what form that took) and he's lived with that, buried inside him and managed it with various substances. As is usually the case these medications of choice grow into a addiction, and eventually the dose needed goes higher and higher.

That's the only reason his football has fallen well below past levels. It's nothing to do with effort and desire.

I suspect being called a waster by some idiot club president in Turkey was the final jolt. If it was, that's great. Flies back to Everton, straight onto the manager and his team, tells them he's off to rehab after explaining all and the club fully support him, as they should.

If angry men on the Internet want to call him out for it, that tells us a lot more about their own fragile mental state than Deles.
 
Mrbluenose said:
At least he's got a shed load of money to help him get through the tough times.

We can all take comfort in that.
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Let's be clear, money and his professional will provide him with additional opportunities for support. However, branding that stick like you are doing is wrong.

Money will mean nothing in terms of removing the memories, healing the broken relationships, or removing the harmful urges from substance abuse.

Money will not fix the mental damage that'll have occurred. As I said in another post, if I was in that situation, I'd swap all the money to remove the pain.

Even more, I'd swap all the money to not have suffered the experiences he has, so money is NOT the answer. The fame and money also brings additional burdens.*

*a prime example is the horrific lack of sympathy and the atrocious victim blaming in this thread. I bet some people here blame rape victims for their clothing!
 

Does anyone know how hes doing fitness wise. Dyche used to call him out every week on the press conference and give us a brief update. He was back on the grass last i heard, but now its gone very quiet. Maybe Everton are trying to keep any pressure of him and keep it all low key. I hope hes not had more setbacks!
 
Cjplennon said:
Does anyone know how hes doing fitness wise. Dyche used to call him out every week on the press conference and give us a brief update. He was back on the grass last i heard, but now its gone very quiet. Maybe Everton are trying to keep any pressure of him and keep it all low key. I hope hes not had more setbacks!
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I read elsewhere he'd unfortunately had another setback. Not seen it confirmed anywhere so who knows.

As you say, Dyche used to name check him without prompt so the last 3 press conferences with no mention does make you wonder.

If he had had a setback, you'd expect the press have been briefed not to ask in the relived press conference to protect the player from angry little incels lurking on GOT.
 
BNJ1878 said:
I read elsewhere he'd unfortunately had another setback. Not seen it confirmed anywhere so who knows.

As you say, Dyche used to name check him without prompt so the last 3 press conferences with no mention does make you wonder.

If he had had a setback, you'd expect the press have been briefed not to ask in the relived press conference to protect the player from angry little incels lurking on GOT.
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There’s no way people still believe he’s actually injured is there, surely.
 

BNJ1878 said:
I read elsewhere he'd unfortunately had another setback. Not seen it confirmed anywhere so who knows.

As you say, Dyche used to name check him without prompt so the last 3 press conferences with no mention does make you wonder.

If he had had a setback, you'd expect the press have been briefed not to ask in the relived press conference to protect the player from angry little incels lurking on GOT.
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Dyche said this before City game

“No, not yet. No, he’s not close yet.“
 
BNJ1878 said:
I read elsewhere he'd unfortunately had another setback. Not seen it confirmed anywhere so who knows.

As you say, Dyche used to name check him without prompt so the last 3 press conferences with no mention does make you wonder.

If he had had a setback, you'd expect the press have been briefed not to ask in the relived press conference to protect the player from angry little incels lurking on GOT.
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Hasn't played yet this season (it's basically Jan), has major, long-term issues, costs a broke club 10M if he plays another 7 games and he's nowhere to be seen because he's unfortunately had another setback. Smell the coffee you fools.
 

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