Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[Professor Toffee]

Thank you all for your words
It's amazing that a football site can be so much more
It's a community and has lifted me out of a daily struggle to a daily smile
So far, thanks

 

[DualityNSNO]

Feel like I'm somewhat worse in the last few days, really struggling to even get out of bed at the moment. Just back in my familiar low...

I think (would like to say know) it will pass soon, but at this point I don't believe me cuz me is wrong most the time ffs.

 

[Kiwi]

Feel like I'm somewhat worse in the last few days, really struggling to even get out of bed at the moment. Just back in my familiar low...

I think (would like to say know) it will pass soon, but at this point I don't believe me cuz me is wrong most the time ffs.

It does pass mate. Believe me that it will. (as an aside just looked at the ads and they say "feeling depressed?" how apt for this thread haha.)
How have you tried to work through it?

 

[bizzaro]

@bizzaro, good point about rumination. I suspect this is the root cause of a lot of folks' problems.

Like I said its both a symptom of depression and a cause of it is rumination. Negative feedback loop.

People with trauma might not be able to help this. Flashbacks. Triggers. These traumatic events come back intrusively.

What needs to happen

Is the person who depressed/traumatised/anxious

Needs to know what these things are and how this affects them and rumination is normal and to try and avoid it excessively.

By development of coping mechanisms and distractions or techniques to get out of it.

Since it can reoccur many times throughout life. Talking about it is very important.

 

[bizzaro]

Feel like I'm somewhat worse in the last few days, really struggling to even get out of bed at the moment. Just back in my familiar low...

I think (would like to say know) it will pass soon, but at this point I don't believe me cuz me is wrong most the time ffs.

I'd try finding a good distraction. You counter a negative with a positive.

Read a couple of books.
Cook a good meal.
Clean/repair your car.
Go see a film.
Go to the gym.
Go for a walk down a sceneic place.
Go sight seeing.
Go see the family/friends.

As I said if your low always counter with a positive. Tonight you'll be able say "this is what I did today"

 

[DualityNSNO]

It does pass mate. Believe me that it will. (as an aside just looked at the ads and they say "feeling depressed?" how apt for this thread haha.)
How have you tried to work through it?

I've had depression for the last few years, it's stuck with me really. Managed to stop/soften it by having the right people around or uni/exercising, but, as it turns out, the current people around me aren't really right, and uni and exercising aren't going too well for me atm.

Right now I'm back in Bulgaria, so that's decent as I am closer to said people, and I'm kept busy by housework and documents and stuff that need to get sorted, but once that's done I either have to be out and busy 24/7 or I'll be down in the gutter.

Also booze here is cheaper, so that's a plus...

 

[DualityNSNO]

I'd try finding a good distraction. You counter a negative with a positive.

Read a couple of books.
Cook a good meal.
Clean/repair your car.
Go see a film.
Go to the gym.
Go for a walk down a sceneic place.
Go sight seeing.
Go see the family/friends.

As I said if your low always counter with a positive. Tonight you'll be able say "this is what I did today"

Ironically what I'm looking up right now.

Thinking of learning a song or 2 on guitar or improve my magic skills (jack of all trades, master of none here, mostly for this reason).

 

[bizzaro]

Ironically what I'm looking up right now.

Thinking of learning a song or 2 on guitar or improve my magic skills (jack of all trades, master of none here, mostly for this reason).

Sound, get on the guitar then for a couple of hours practice. Then go out for dinner later and your sorted. Then you can show off the guitar skillz later on

 

[dholliday]

Feel like I'm somewhat worse in the last few days, really struggling to even get out of bed at the moment. Just back in my familiar low...

I think (would like to say know) it will pass soon, but at this point I don't believe me cuz me is wrong most the time ffs.

Hiya Dual.

I know what you mean, I have this issue permanently, but i don't get the mental negativity associated with depression, i just always feel exhausted and sort-of logically decide to stay in bed, regardless of stuff i should be doing. but having to work gets me out of bed, so can't be that debilitating. but yeah, when i was single and i had a week or two off work, i could very easily stay in bed the whole time, ordering pizzas and the like. You get into this darkly-comfortable cycle and it's a bugger to break out of it. With me, I'd say to myself at the end of the day "right then, tomorrow gonna get up early and do stuff". but then i'd not wanna get up until afternoon, then i'd have to eat something, then get distracted by reading the news on the internet, and suddenly it's 6pm, then i repeat the cycle, until work starts again. i'd also be ignoring phone calls & mails from mates, can't even say why i was ignoring them...just couldn't be arsed somehow.


Internet is good initially, but internet addiction (which i probably have) can really prevent getting out of holes like this. I guess the 4 things that help me break out these cycles are:

1) less internet at home
2) managing my physical health better
3) taking on more work (within reason! and conversely, a break from work can also be good)
4) getting into a relationship, and now living together (easier said than done, i got lucky i think)


But everyone's different, and I'm not sure I've ever had anything like the illness of depression, but certainly lack of motivation/energy, which I suppose is a common symptom of depression, so perhaps related. There is some school of thought that a depressed mental condition can significantly exacerbate physical ailments, and also the other way around: that a range of abstract, difficult to treat, physical ailments can exacerbate a depressed mental state.

In my case i've got crazy-high allergy ratings, superbad asthma, fat bloaty belly and hypothyroiditis...so these physical conditions are a big reason for the symptoms, and in the last couple of years I've managed them a lot better, so that i sleep better. Now there's a slight, but important, improvement in my daily motivation.

Also booze here is cheaper, so that's a plus...

That's not a plus, mate xx

 

[Kiwi]

I've had depression for the last few years, it's stuck with me really. Managed to stop/soften it by having the right people around or uni/exercising, but, as it turns out, the current people around me aren't really right, and uni and exercising aren't going too well for me atm.

Right now I'm back in Bulgaria, so that's decent as I am closer to said people, and I'm kept busy by housework and documents and stuff that need to get sorted, but once that's done I either have to be out and busy 24/7 or I'll be down in the gutter.

Also booze here is cheaper, so that's a plus...

@bizzaro is right about this. It isn't so much the doing things that matters. Thats a short term solution. Its about using yourself doing things to form a sense of accomplishment, where you can sit down and say this is what I've done today, so that when you reflect back about your day you feel better. Then taking that to the next level, which is actually making the conscious decision to look at your life and go, I am useful, I can do and am doing all these things and as a result life is not all bad, that there are things to look forward to that I enjoy that far outweigh the moments when I feel down. Its not something that just happens, I found I needed to work actively to change how I saw things, and it is still an ongoing battle. But I'm in a better place today as a result.

 

[bizzaro]

@bizzaro is right about this. It isn't so much the doing things that matters. Thats a short term solution. Its about using yourself doing things to form a sense of accomplishment, where you can sit down and say this is what I've done today, so that when you reflect back about your day you feel better. Then taking that to the next level, which is actually making the conscious decision to look at your life and go, I am useful, I can do and am doing all these things and as a result life is not all bad, that there are things to look forward to that I enjoy that far outweigh the moments when I feel down. Its not something that just happens, I found I needed to work actively to change how I saw things, and it is still an ongoing battle. But I'm in a better place today as a result.

Agree. Plus you obviously get the benefit of new skills/experiences/knowledge

That goes with it that improves your life going forward.

 

[DualityNSNO]

I know booze isn't a plus, like, I've been addicted before in my life about 5 years ago (I'm 21 soon, imagine; cheap and accessible anything isn't good in huge quantities).

I am trying to do these things you're saying here, lads, and thanks - it's just that I can't bring myself to do it any more. Done it a few times before, but now it just feels like too much, you know? Dunno how to put it better, sorry...

 

[1966efc]

[QUOTE="DualityNSNO, post: 2997861, member: 5732"]I know booze isn't a plus, like, I've been addicted before in my life about 5 years ago (I'm 21 soon, imagine; cheap and accessible anything isn't good in huge quantities).

I am trying to do these things you're saying here, lads, and thanks - it's just that I can't bring myself to do it any more. Done it a few times before, but now it just feels like too much, you know? Dunno how to put it better, sorry...[/QUOTE]

It's a depressant, so in a way it's a bit like a man on fire saying, "Oh. I'm on fire. I know, I'll pour some petrol on it to stop it."

Self help isn't only good, it's necessary BUT support from a mental health team (maybe including anti depressants and / or psychotherapy) should be a 'must' for someone with severe depression. Don't know about health service provision in Bulgaria but the quickest route in to NHS services is A & E: explaining the severity of your symptoms to a Psychiatric Liaison worker could well lead to a referral to the local Adult Mental Health team. G P's may not gauge the severity of the condition.

If you got appendicitis, you wouldn't try to treat it yourself. Same goes for severe depression.

 

[DualityNSNO]

I know booze isn't a plus, like, I've been addicted before in my life about 5 years ago (I'm 21 soon, imagine; cheap and accessible anything isn't good in huge quantities).

I am trying to do these things you're saying here, lads, and thanks - it's just that I can't bring myself to do it any more. Done it a few times before, but now it just feels like too much, you know? Dunno how to put it better, sorry...

It's a depressant, so in a way it's a bit like a man on fire saying, "Oh. I'm on fire. I know, I'll pour some petrol on it to stop it."

Self help isn't only good, it's necessary BUT support from a mental health team (maybe including anti depressants and / or psychotherapy) should be a 'must' for someone with severe depression. Don't know about health service provision in Bulgaria but the quickest route in to NHS services is A & E: explaining the severity of your symptoms to a Psychiatric Liaison worker could well lead to a referral to the local Adult Mental Health team. G P's may not gauge the severity of the condition.

If you got appendicitis, you wouldn't try to treat it yourself. Same goes for severe depression.

I'm back in the UK in about 2 weeks anyway, so I'll just go visit A&E. Didn't know they'd accept it like that, thought I'd have to go through my GP...

Thanks anyway, mate. Appreciate it.

 

[1966efc]

Not a problem.

I really don't want to come across as a wise arse on this but a couple of thoughts:

The best results come through brutal honesty with whoever you speak to. A lot of young lads feel they have to put a gloss on their symptoms to avoid coming across as weak. If those symptoms include strong thoughts of self harm, this needs to be spelled out graphically,including any plans that may have been made NOT so that people can wrap the person in cotton wool but because the revelation helps the psychiatric team to place you on the scale of seriousness. I've highlighted this because that position on the scale determines the amount of support you'll receive.

"Rumination" has been talked about on here at some length and one or two people have noted the value of distraction. It's quite important for a couple of reasons, one of them being this: serious depression & rumination can slide in to delusion & hallucination. By "delusion", I don't mean a person will suddenly think they're Donald Duck or whatever (though s/he may!) but paranoia regarding other people's motives, plots and plans etc. Really not a good place to be.

So do a bit of washing & ironing; or cook; start the great novel; walk a neighbour's dog. Anything and everything till you can present your ass in A & E.