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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

MrD said:
That does sound nice. Not gonna lie.
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My daughter is 3 and one thing she loves is looking for bugs. She was talking non stop about spiders so we went to the local park to look for them one afternoon. She had so much fun and it didn't cost a penny.

Just be with her. Talk to her. Tell her stories, make them up using her toys as characters. I really think stuff like this means more to kids than expensive days out. Take care mate.
 
MrD said:
How do you take on board what they say and actively try to adjust your thinking while your usual thought patterns are trying to sabotage it?

It's like when people say look in the mirror and give yourself a compliment. I've tried and I just don't believe a word of it.
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Try not to guess ahead mate, hopefully you'll get a good therapist who'll explain it all. Its not a sudden change, its gradual. They give u homework to do, they explain to u re challenging the thoughts that come into your head, they talk about exploring the root of your thoughts/ideas/beliefs and how to challenge them etc. They talk of a 'pause button' that use to work for me. I was told it's a combo of meds and therapy that works best. Having had just therapy followed 12 months later by a massive dip i tried the meds and therapy. Worked wonders.
Best of luck pal.
 
MrD said:
How do you take on board what they say and actively try to adjust your thinking while your usual thought patterns are trying to sabotage it?

It's like when people say look in the mirror and give yourself a compliment. I've tried and I just don't believe a word of it.
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Best way I can explain it is that it's like retraining your mind. It can take several weeks and alot of effort. I used to have certain thought path ways that ended up in a very negative place. I had to actively force my thoughts down a different pathway. Eventually these new more positive pathways became the norm.
 
MrD said:
Yeah, I was thinking about going to the museum. She's 3 so everything is either amazing or total awful. Should be fun!
I will attend the counseling. Not sure what to say but I'll attend.
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No one ever knows what they want to or should say at their first counselling session. That’s a good thing in my mind as it shows there’s obviously something deeper to explore.
 

MrD said:
How do you take on board what they say and actively try to adjust your thinking while your usual thought patterns are trying to sabotage it?

It's like when people say look in the mirror and give yourself a compliment. I've tried and I just don't believe a word of it.
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We are rooting for you man! You have the GOT family behind you. You know im going to check on you. Genuinely care about where your life goes from here as much as everyone else. Never alone buddy :)
 
@MrD There is so much you can do for very little outlay in Liverpool. The bus ride and £10 ( if you c
MrD said:
How do you take on board what they say and actively try to adjust your thinking while your usual thought patterns are trying to sabotage it?

It's like when people say look in the mirror and give yourself a compliment. I've tried and I just don't believe a word of it.
Click to expand...
because you have a daughter who needs her hero of a dad
 
MrD said:
Hi fellas. Thanks for the concern. I'm in no place to complain after reading a few of the recent events in this thread but....

I'm not doing very good. I just can't shake these feelings of regret and severe unhappiness. I'm utterly miserable.

Lots of negative thoughts that just take over me. I'm fantasizing about not being around anymore but I'm still around so it can't be that bad I guess.

Don't be worried. I'm just an utter failure who people will say is feeling sorry for himself.
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I hope you don't mind me asking but it may uncover something that is holding back your progress. Any drink or psychoactive drugs lately? Psychoactive drugs are actually anything from caffeine, nicotine and up.

Have you tried any talk therapy or exercise or anything to help your mood? Chin up, pal. You've got the strength in you to get through it.
 
MrD said:
How do you take on board what they say and actively try to adjust your thinking while your usual thought patterns are trying to sabotage it?

It's like when people say look in the mirror and give yourself a compliment. I've tried and I just don't believe a word of it.
Click to expand...

You'll hopefully work with the counselor on coping mechanisms to start keeping those thought patterns at bay.
 

Well that didnt take long. My mum came in this morning and pretty much told me I'm not welcome.

Told me to go. She started shaming me in regards to my age and what I've got and haven't got.

So I've got no choice but to try and find a flat or something.

Told you all I'm poison.
 
MrD said:
Well that didnt take long. My mum came in this morning and pretty much told me I'm not welcome.

Told me to go. She started shaming me in regards to my age and what I've got and haven't got.

So I've got no choice but to try and find a flat or something.

Told you all I'm poison.
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Perhaps your Mum is trying the 'cruel to be kind' / 'tough love' route, mate. She loves and cares for you, she wouldn't have had you back at in the 1st place if that wasn't the case.

Sometimes we all need an arm around the shoulder, telling us that everything is going to be alright and other times we all need a kick up the arse. Most of us naturally procrastinate and make excuses not to do important things that we know we really should do. If we're left to our own devices, those excuses start to feel valid to us and a sharp dose of reality from a third party, although painful at first, can be very good at snapping us out of our comfort zone.

It's how you react to that from here that's important. Despite what you may think, you are not weak and you are not poison. You're a good person and you have a lot to offer the world. Hear what your Mum has to say because she knows you better than most, those words will hurt but they won't break you. You're strong and you can take it, I know you can.

A job and a flat seems a world away right now but they could be just what you need to turn things around. The way you're feeling is totally understandable but things are never as bad as they seem. It's important to stay positive mentally but it's even more important to keep making those positive steps we've talked about. We're all here for you mate.
 
Keiran said:
Perhaps your Mum is trying the 'cruel to be kind' / 'tough love' route, mate. She loves and cares for you, she wouldn't have had you back at in the 1st place if that wasn't the case.

Sometimes we all need an arm around the shoulder, telling us that everything is going to be alright and other times we all need a kick up the arse. Most of us naturally procrastinate and make excuses not to do important things that we know we really should do. If we're left to our own devices, those excuses start to feel valid to us and a sharp dose of reality from a third party, although painful at first, can be very good at snapping us out of our comfort zone.

It's how you react to that from here that's important. Despite what you may think, you are not weak and you are not poison. You're a good person and you have a lot to offer the world. Hear what your Mum has to say because she knows you better than most, those words will hurt but they won't break you. You're strong and you can take it, I know you can.

A job and a flat seems a world away right now but they could be just what you need to turn things around. The way you're feeling is totally understandable but things are never as bad as they seem. It's important to stay positive mentally but it's even more important to keep making those positive steps we've talked about. We're all here for you mate.
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I heard her loud and clear. She let me back because she felt obliged. She started trying to shame me because of my situation and situation with my daughter.

I'm looking at a bedsit near my ex. Grim. Doesn't have a fridge, oven or anything.

Also, I've no idea what to do about electricity, gas, council tax all that stuff.

Also, I won't have internet there so I'll be unreachable. I don't have a contract phone with loads of data.

If anyone wants my number send me a message. Just incase anyone feels the need to text me or anything.

At the moment you guys are the only friends I've got.
 
Bryan said:
@MrD There is so much you can do for very little outlay in Liverpool. The bus ride and £10 ( if you c

because you have a daughter who needs her hero of a dad
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Messed up my response here. Soz. Was just saying there is loads to do in Liverpool for very little cash, don’t wanna seem over bearing and shouting loads of positivity when I know how low you are feeling. I think it’s cos I have been exactly where you’ve been I see a lot of myself in you. Hang in there mate. It’s bad, but it’s not the end of the world as it may seem.
 

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