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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

Woolverhampton_Blue said:
Thank you everyone. I woke up but I haven’t gone to work for a second day in a row.

It’s just been a tough few weeks/months. Me and my girlfriend split up, my Dad’s health is bad and getting worse which is a constant worry, I lost a job (but found a new one thankfully), I’m going to have to find a new place to live in the next few months, my financial situation isn’t great, I don’t really have many friends anymore and feel incredibly isolated. On top of that I’m fighting a constant battle with alcohol and drugs which has worn me down over time.

I’ve been on antidepressants for over a year and they do seem to help but as many of you will know they’re not a cure all. I feel very, very tired and low on hope.
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Just keep keeping posting on here mate.

Someone will always get back to you.
 

Harryflashman said:
genuine mate I don’t know where you are with your PTSD but if you ever want to chat or discuss coping mechanisms or generally just rant feel free to pm me and we can talk off here or whatever . just an offer obviously and zero pressure to take it up .
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I have had so much help some worked some made it worse ,,,its like trying to square a circle - anger attacks are a bad side effect not just on here but in real life situations as once you have been abused, unexpectedly in a serious bullying situation you tend to jump in with anger without a thought process not all the time , but on occasions panic sets in ....
It was hard when your profession you had worked hard for getting to the top a reorganisation possibly seen as a threat a new regime get rid of you in terrible circumstances....
I have been told to go to a book publisher , and get it published, I turned a TV interview down as I did not want more flack on my family.....
It really was scandalous the way things worked out..
The old saying put your head above the parapet to fight the powerful bullies your head gets shot off...
 
Woolverhampton_Blue said:
Thank you everyone. I woke up but I haven’t gone to work for a second day in a row.

It’s just been a tough few weeks/months. Me and my girlfriend split up, my Dad’s health is bad and getting worse which is a constant worry, I lost a job (but found a new one thankfully), I’m going to have to find a new place to live in the next few months, my financial situation isn’t great, I don’t really have many friends anymore and feel incredibly isolated. On top of that I’m fighting a constant battle with alcohol and drugs which has worn me down over time.

I’ve been on antidepressants for over a year and they do seem to help but as many of you will know they’re not a cure all. I feel very, very tired and low on hope.
Click to expand...

I'm glad you are here today WB. Am a big fan of not making permanent decisions based on short-term problems. That's all this is amigo, as deep and unescapeable as it may seem. It will pass. If I had to guess based on things I've read in the past, the drugs and alcohol are at the root of the cause/pathology or at the very least are exacerbating any stress in your life. All things psychoactive like drugs, alcohol, coffee, etc play with the biological reward system in your brain. You build up these things that make you feel really awesome like drugs but the natural things in life don't seem as good any more. It's really a thing I wish didn't exist, but it can be overcome with help.

Perception isn't always reality.
 
Joey66 said:
I have had so much help some worked some made it worse ,,,its like trying to square a circle - anger attacks are a bad side effect not just on here but in real life situations as once you have been abused, unexpectedly in a serious bullying situation you tend to jump in with anger without a thought process not all the time , but on occasions panic sets in ....
It was hard when your profession you had worked hard for getting to the top a reorganisation possibly seen as a threat a new regime get rid of you in terrible circumstances....
I have been told to go to a book publisher , and get it published, I turned a TV interview down as I did not want more flack on my family.....
It really was scandalous the way things worked out..
The old saying put your head above the parapet to fight the powerful bullies your head gets shot off...
Click to expand...

rage is really common , I used to have angry outbursts , usually to do with protecting myself or people close to me . I also on occasion plan how events will play out , so only yesterday I was out with somebody in a bar and and a couple of lads were a bit loud and close to her at the bar , doing nothing wrong other than being boisterous. In my head though I’ve decided (I describe it like the Sherlock Holmes film , where he see how the ‘fight ‘ will play out ) how I’ll deal with them if anything needs to happen , exactly what I’ll do . Nothing happened it was fine , Perhaps a few years ago it might have had a ended with me reacting a bit OTT but like I say fortunately I seem to have left that In the rear view .

For me exercise really helped exorcise that particular demon but there are loads of coping strategies, Which I hope you are aware of . From generally calming yourself with exercise . mindfulness , meditation or whatever to distraction which is brilliant for when you can feel it building . So I was obviously recommended deep breaths to calm yourself but what I found most helpful was , and it sounds ridiculous , was tracing the outline of a window (or another visible object ) with your eyes . So as you feel the anger perhaps 3, 4 or a half dozen times follow the shape of the window whilst trying to control your breathing . Honestly I really found it calmed me , it’s basically a fancy equivalent of counting to ten but with added distraction .
 
AmericasToffee said:
I'm glad you are here today WB. Am a big fan of not making permanent decisions based on short-term problems. That's all this is amigo, as deep and unescapeable as it may seem. It will pass. If I had to guess based on things I've read in the past, the drugs and alcohol are at the root of the cause/pathology or at the very least are exacerbating any stress in your life. All things psychoactive like drugs, alcohol, coffee, etc play with the biological reward system in your brain. You build up these things that make you feel really awesome like drugs but the natural things in life don't seem as good any more. It's really a thing I wish didn't exist, but it can be overcome with help.

Perception isn't always reality.
Click to expand...

The alcohol and drugs have contributed to lots of my problems, yes, though not all of them. They’re certainly making my life worse than it needs to be right now. I’m in a lot of pain at the moment and deeply frustrated which makes a ‘quick fix’ tempting. I need to stay sober for things to get better.
 

Woolverhampton_Blue said:
The alcohol and drugs have contributed to lots of my problems, yes, though not all of them. They’re certainly making my life worse than it needs to be right now. I’m in a lot of pain at the moment and deeply frustrated which makes a ‘quick fix’ tempting. I need to stay sober for things to get better.
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I know you mentioned that you’re on meds mate, but have you ever sought professional help for your other problems ?

Ps - have you read Speedo Mick’s story - everything he had to overcome to get back on his feet ?

It’s on his charity site - Leavealighton
 
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COYBL25 said:
I know you mentioned that you’re on meds mate, but have you ever sought professional help for your other problems ?
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Went to AA for a while last year. Stopped going because a lot of the people there were what you’d call ‘proper’ alcoholics and I’m more of a binge/bender type person. Didn’t want to have to admit I could never drink again. Sadly over the years my drinking and substance abuse has cost me jobs, to a great extent my relationship (which is an incredibly hard thing to come to terms with), is alienating friends, and means it’s hard for me to make any real progress in my life. Think I’m going to have to admit I need to go back to AA.

I’ve always felt very lonely and depressed - not sure what I can do about that if I’m honest. The medication helps level things out but it doesn’t take the loneliness or emptiness away. Especially the case now I’ve lost my girlfriend - and don’t really have many friends (that is just as much to do with life and growing up as with anything I’ve done in particular).

Can’t do much about my Dads health but it would certainly help if I was in a stable position so I’m not a worry or burden to my parents. They know about my drinking and it worries them, naturally.
 
Woolverhampton_Blue said:
Went to AA for a while last year. Stopped going because a lot of the people there were what you’d call ‘proper’ alcoholics and I’m more of a binge/bender type person. Didn’t want to have to admit I could never drink again. Sadly over the years my drinking and substance abuse has cost me jobs, to a great extent my relationship (which is an incredibly hard thing to come to terms with), is alienating friends, and means it’s hard for me to make any real progress in my life. Think I’m going to have to admit I need to go back to AA.

I’ve always felt very lonely and depressed - not sure what I can do about that if I’m honest. The medication helps level things out but it doesn’t take the loneliness or emptiness away. Especially the case now I’ve lost my girlfriend - and don’t really have many friends (that is just as much to do with life and growing up as with anything I’ve done in particular).

Can’t do much about my Dads health but it would certainly help if I was in a stable position so I’m not a worry or burden to my parents. They know about my drinking and it worries them, naturally.
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You already know the answer mate - go back to AA ;)
 

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