Gardening with Joey

[Joey66]

I fear my accuracy may waver during this crucial task and I could end up sprinkling the herbs. I'm not sure the ire from the wife would be any better than from the French lady next door.

Pee in a bottle first....

 

[Bruce Wayne]

Pee in a bottle first....

Good idea. They trained us how to do that at cyclists cheating school, although they usually taught us to use someone else's wee.

 

[KaiserEFC]

Hi Joey I confused the advice you gave @Bruce Wayne and I’ve shot my neighbours and planted some squirrels. What slug pellets do you recommend to keep the police away?

 

[orly]

If you've got snakes in your garden, what should you do?

 

[JimmyJeffers]

And on today's episode of 'Gardening with Joey'

- Shooting squirrels
- Pissing on your herbs
- Sparking diplomatic incidents

He’s started the day BIG. Be interesting to see if he can keep this momentum going

 

[Bungle]

He’s started the day BIG. Be interesting to see if he can keep this momentum going

Just waiting for his factually inaccurate update about motorway traffic, been an exhilarating start to the day.

 

[COYBL25]

Thing is, we have a French neighbour, and I worry today of all days, she may think we're re-enacting Agincourt. I wouldn't want a diplomatic incident, much less force her to catapult livestock at us.

I wouldn`t worry too much, as the first time she`s gets sight of the gun, she`ll either run away or try to surrender to you.

 

[JimmyJeffers]

Just waiting for his factually inaccurate update about motorway traffic, been an exhilarating start to the day.

The squirrels round his way must be terrified of him. If he’s not shooting at them he’s pissing on them! Utter tyrant

 

[COYBL25]

And on today's episode of 'Gardening with Joey'

- Shooting squirrels
- Pissing on your herbs
- Sparking diplomatic incidents

We`ve also got gay gardening too, or more commonly known as uphill gardening.

 

[Bruce Wayne]

I wouldn`t worry too much, as the first time she`s gets sight of the gun, she`ll either run away or try to surrender to you.

I have been trying to get her to run for many years

 

[Joey66]

Good idea. They trained us how to do that at cyclists cheating school, although they usually taught us to use someone else's wee.

Wee sprinkled on the outside of any lawn on the soil border will keep cats from crapping on your lawn - they smell it and it makes them think they are vulnerable to an attack from a larger species.......
They are territorial creatures and the smell will stop them otherwise expect crap all over your lawn......

 

[jaycee]

Wee sprinkled on the outside of any lawn on the soil border will keep cats from crapping on your lawn - they smell it and it makes them think they are vulnerable to an attack from a larger species.......
They are territorial creatures and the smell will stop them otherwise expect crap all over your lawn......

The kop must terrify them

 

[JimmyJeffers]

Wee sprinkled on the outside of any lawn on the soil border will keep cats from crapping on your lawn - they smell it and it makes them think they are vulnerable to an attack from a larger species.......
They are territorial creatures and the smell will stop them otherwise expect crap all over your lawn......

My dad pisses on a local badger sett for this reason. I’m not sure what the badgers think of this mind you. Probably disgusted and who could blame them

 

[Dario Terracotta]

This thread is Gold up there with Yaarghs Aldo magic lol

 

[Bungle]

My dad pisses on a local badger sett for this reason. I’m not sure what the badgers think of this mind you. Probably disgusted and who could blame them

Can't believe you bought that excuse as to why he had his knob out on the middle of a field.