Latest news from Pope Cortina.
Following the breakdown in talks and the Turkish window closing, Everton have a new cunning plan.
The upfuckistan transfer window is still open and Everton are confident that they can offload James Rodriguez to GoatHerders afc of the upfuckistan premier conference on loan, for no fee, whilst paying James his full wages and image rights for the remainder of his contract, and also covering the costs of James Vape fluid for the rest of the contract, which runs into the millions, due to his appalling addiction.
Marcel Brands said " We have to get him off the wages, it is crippling us him earning £2900000000 pw, but this will be a great deal for Everton and James. The MEGA Da's will be buzzing on GOT, so it's all good, and will get them off my case for a bit. Anyway, I'm off to book a holiday, see you next summer, bellends!"