Never had a girlfriend, thought I would ask for some advice from GOT

[tommye]

You HAVE to lie or at least exaggerate.

I always used to say i owned a kebab kiosk. Totally straight faced and an obvious lie (was always out in a suit after work) then of course they want to know the mystery.

Also if theres a guy or a few around a stunner go and pretend shes your half sister...the guys cant tell if your joking and the girls seem to like how weird it all is...

*calls interpol

 

[COYB]

Tinder is a shocker mate steer clear.

Ketamine, it's all in the ketamine mate.

he's on too something here, get a ket wig
thatll work nowa-days.

 

[Goat]

he's on too something here, get a ket wig
thatll work nowa-days.

Ket wig and a beard seems to be all the rage.

 

[tommye]

Ket wig and a beard seems to be all the rage.

and Pokemon Go if you want attract children...

*disclaimer* this is in no way advice Zat

 

[Goat]

and Pokemon Go if you want attract children...

*disclaimer* this is in no way advice Zat

Wow.

 

[tommye]

Wow.

 

[USABlue]

What a thread.

 

[Connor]

Used to be...getting itchy feet...

Took the girlfriends younger 18 year old brother out on the lash for his birthday last year and got him 2 hookers...left them in the VIP room in the bar for 2 hours while i was on best behaviour downstairs.

Then he goes and tells my gf about it who then tells the family i paid for him to have a threesome to lose his virginity....

Not been invited to see the family in ages

Zat this did not happen. You've made this up for fake internet points.

 

[DownOnTheUpside]

it's all about getting that killer hairdo and looking hella fly

learn young grasshopper

 

[mezzrow]

Advice from the seventies from an old man. I'm a grizzled veteran of Nut and Bolt night at the Happy Jax Lounge.

It was just like today, except there wasn't any ket or cell phones then, and lemo was through the roof expensive so none of that.

Actually, it was nothing like today except we wanted to have it off. Assuming that's still the case.

Anyway - honey honey, hey... baby, don't you want a man like me? Great band - spanish subtitles, gratis.

 

[KaiserEFC]

Used to be...getting itchy feet...

Took the girlfriends younger 18 year old brother out on the lash for his birthday last year and got him 2 hookers...left them in the VIP room in the bar for 2 hours while i was on best behaviour downstairs.

Then he goes and tells my gf about it who then tells the family i paid for him to have a threesome to lose his virginity....

Not been invited to see the family in ages

Legend.

 

[admirschleck]

From Stoke's reserves to owning a kebab kiosk. I repeat, kebab kiosk.

GOT.

 

[mezzrow]

From Stoke's reserves to owning a kebab kiosk. I repeat, kebab kiosk.

GOT.

 

[Connor]

From Stoke's reserves to owning a kebab kiosk. I repeat, kebab kiosk.

GOT.

Errm?

 

[DualityNSNO]

Errm?

A post earlier in the thread.