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Personal injuries
- Thread starter Groucho
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tommye
Player Valuation: £100m
Sharing is caring ?
Haha nah m8, come off me motorbike at about 300km/h
would be the cool thing to say, however it was a wet bathroom floor and i went arse up lol
tommye
Player Valuation: £100m
lollollol
tommye
Player Valuation: £100m
Diddums got a splinter and the gaffer butchered his finger to retrieve it before it became septic.
Explains his typing I guess ?
Nearly did a laughing reaction to the first post rather than the third then. Wouldn't have looked good.
Bluesaint
Player Valuation: £5m
FFS Tommye. I was just taking a bite of my ham salad sandwich and was looking at the tomato. I shouldn't even be that squeamish as I work in a hospital, but that put me right off.
tommye
Player Valuation: £100m
I'd expect no less from you and your forum of monsters tbh.
It's why I love you all.
Google propagation of Berberis .....
Pootsy
Player Valuation: £20m
Ooooh where to start!
When I was 13 I had a scrotum hernia caused by Testicular Torsion. This is where the a Nad rotates twisting the testicular chord. The chord then wrapped itself over said Nad and tied itself into a knot. The pain was excruciating. Firstly my Dad was trying to work out if I'd been having a one manned arm wrestle with myself but looking back it was from saving a rather spicy penalty with my plums earlier in the day that did the damage. Still a teenager does not want to disclose information like that to their parents. This added to the pain. Needless to say, an overnight stay at the hospital with a surgery to untie by ball knots resulted in much less pain but a few years of bullying and getting called Swingball etc even though a full compliment of 2 plums are still in place to this day. I can also confirm they are still working so well done to all in that Surgical team that day.
Second isn't quite as bad but those squeamish amongst us will maybe not enjoy this one, if they are still reading.
Playing football a few years back and went in for a slide tackle. Unfortunately my thumb went into a hole left by a stud. I kept sliding. Either I stopped sliding or my thumb would have to go from a 90 degree movement to 180 degree movement to allow my momentum to continue. The latter occured leaving me with a scaphoid fracture of the thumb. On my right hand. I still had to drive home from the game after getting changed. Try taping your thumb to your hand so it cannot be used then try to get dressed. Bloody Tricky. Now add pain and sweating and you'll understand the place I was in.
I've done my ACL and torn my adductor muscle too while playing football. In hindsight I should have never taken up the game. Maybe my injury-proness qualified me to play for Everton?
When I was 13 I had a scrotum hernia caused by Testicular Torsion. This is where the a Nad rotates twisting the testicular chord. The chord then wrapped itself over said Nad and tied itself into a knot. The pain was excruciating. Firstly my Dad was trying to work out if I'd been having a one manned arm wrestle with myself but looking back it was from saving a rather spicy penalty with my plums earlier in the day that did the damage. Still a teenager does not want to disclose information like that to their parents. This added to the pain. Needless to say, an overnight stay at the hospital with a surgery to untie by ball knots resulted in much less pain but a few years of bullying and getting called Swingball etc even though a full compliment of 2 plums are still in place to this day. I can also confirm they are still working so well done to all in that Surgical team that day.
Second isn't quite as bad but those squeamish amongst us will maybe not enjoy this one, if they are still reading.
Playing football a few years back and went in for a slide tackle. Unfortunately my thumb went into a hole left by a stud. I kept sliding. Either I stopped sliding or my thumb would have to go from a 90 degree movement to 180 degree movement to allow my momentum to continue. The latter occured leaving me with a scaphoid fracture of the thumb. On my right hand. I still had to drive home from the game after getting changed. Try taping your thumb to your hand so it cannot be used then try to get dressed. Bloody Tricky. Now add pain and sweating and you'll understand the place I was in.
I've done my ACL and torn my adductor muscle too while playing football. In hindsight I should have never taken up the game. Maybe my injury-proness qualified me to play for Everton?
tommye
Player Valuation: £100m
I know my limits mate.
Never even had a pair of those on my feet as I KNOW it only ends one way.
Same reason I've never ridden a motorbike, guaranteed ends with me under a lorry or similar.
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JLW
Player Valuation: £60m
Only football injury was pulled hamstring playing on the mystery and i genuinely thought id been shot by an air rifle.
5 inch scar on my thigh because my bellend mate messing around with a stanley blade thought he had slid it back in the case but never completely and sliced my leg wide open. We was all garyed up at the time so cut the leg of my kecks i was wearing and tied it around my thigh to stop the bleeding, because i couldn't face the ozzy with my jaw swinging.
Oh and i had a 15 hour operation to remove a brain tumour 5 years ago! (Probably explains a lot of the crap i post on here)
5 inch scar on my thigh because my bellend mate messing around with a stanley blade thought he had slid it back in the case but never completely and sliced my leg wide open. We was all garyed up at the time so cut the leg of my kecks i was wearing and tied it around my thigh to stop the bleeding, because i couldn't face the ozzy with my jaw swinging.
Oh and i had a 15 hour operation to remove a brain tumour 5 years ago! (Probably explains a lot of the crap i post on here)
Stopped reading here tbh. Rather see saw off fingers than read anymore of this post.
tommye
Player Valuation: £100m
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