I know you're joking but I moan enough watching on my dodgy streams I can only imagine how awful it is in person, it's weird too because at one point Dyche did play a pressing style and it worked quite well but he seems to have gone into some sort of shell lately.
He was telling them before a ball was even kicked that they were in a relegation battle and as a result we are playing like it. Probably bored them to death with some tales about what it was like before he got here too or something.