Strange or funny things which happened in work

[Toffeeslam]

The strangest thing I witnessed was a all hands team meeting with all employees around the world dialling into a conference bridge.

one participant forgot to mute and kept farting and complaining about the meal his wife made for him causing his distress.

with over 250 people on the call including the CEO

 

[random]

same mechanic, same manager had a bit of a row, don't know if you have been in car workshops but they have these exhaust extractors...



so the mechanic removed the stop (round black thing on the hose), cable tied the managers bike to the extractor end and sent it up to the roof.

ended up having to go to a tool hire place for some mega ladders to retrieve the bike as it was next to the ceiling

 

[Cool_Blue]

I shat myself once

In the bogs or at your desk?

 

[random]

Service receptionist left a message on a customers ansaphone letting them know the car was ready.

Receptionist puts down phone then proceeds to rant to her colleague what an utter ******* the woman was, the rant went on for about 3-4 minutes.

Bit of a problem when it was discovered that the phone hadn't been put on the cradle properly and the expletive laden message was heard by the woman's husband who proceeded to bring the answer machine tape in and play it to the owner of the business.

 

[kev]

I'd be very interested in hearing any stories anybody has about strange or funny things which happened to them in the workplace

I worked in a psychiatric hospital for years. Strange (and often funny) things were just the norm.

 

[Death]

About a month ago I was servicing grease traps in this big mental home. It's a big campus with many traps and I discovered I left a tool across the other side of campus and was under time pressure.

I ran like mad a quarter mile it must have been and as I got to the trap and picked up my tool. A rogue patient that had escaped into the campas come darting at me 100 miles and hour it passionate zeal to do harm to.me screaming "you bastaaaaard". A carer was closely following her with a bloody nose apologising to me.

Now at this time I had already ran a lot and was very out of breath. She proceeded to chase me around campus as I ducked and dodged and occasionally having thoughts of laying down and taking my battering. As I felt I was going to die. This went on for 10 minutes all about campus until they wheeled out one of her friends as a distraction and once she seen her friend she flipped a switch and became the nicest person in the world laughing and giggling.

It took my a while to process and recover from it mentally but most of all physically.

 

[Baines' left foot]

In 2016 I was working on a construction huge site which had around 2000 people per day. There was an excel spreadsheet which listed accidents, incidents and near misses that occurred on site - which was a lot considering the amount of people on site - and it served as a bit of a pick-me-up on tough days.

Examples:
- Intruder was found trespassing on site. When intruder was approached he ran off
- Fire marshal tripped and sprained ankle chasing an intruder
- Operative hit in face with wood after throwing it in the skip and it bounced out
- Operative using angle grinder almost decapitates himself
- Operative shot himself in hand with nail gun

 

[random]

In 2016 I was working on a construction huge site which had around 2000 people per day. There was an excel spreadsheet which listed accidents, incidents and near misses that occurred on site - which was a lot considering the amount of people on site - and it served as a bit of a pick-me-up on tough days.

Examples:
- Intruder was found trespassing on site. When intruder was approached he ran off
- Fire marshal tripped and sprained ankle chasing an intruder
- Operative hit in face with wood after throwing it in the skip and it bounced out
- Operative using angle grinder almost decapitates himself
- Operative shot himself in hand with nail gun

yeah, the accident book and customer complaint files were always good for a giggle

 

[wm02]

About seven or eight years ago we had a situation stemming from a lady who worked in IT and always seemed mild-mannered. She sent the following email to everyone in the company (about 900 people).
It read “If that b***h needed to know, she’d know by now. She doesn’t so what should that tell her?”
Of course, within minutes emails were flying throughout the company trying to figure out who she was referring to and one fella tried to set up a betting pool similar to a Super Bowl score sheet

 

[JimmyJeffers]

It was lunch break in the canteen. Place was packed. Anyways , Tim Howard started to open his Fireman Sam lunchbox. One of the arl fellas from deliveries let out a massive raspberry just as he was opening it. lol Place went ballistic. A fella from the HR department actually pissed himsel. lollolYou had to be there lar. Poor Tim had a face like a smacked arsecheek lol

 

[verreauxi]

It was lunch break in the canteen. Place was packed. Anyways , Tim Howard started to open his Fireman Sam lunchbox. One of the arl fellas from deliveries let out a massive raspberry just as he was opening it. lol Place went ballistic. A fella from the HR department actually pissed himsel. lollolYou had to be there lar. Poor Tim had a face like a smacked arsecheek lol

This is how memes are born.

 

[Aberblue]

I worked in a psychiatric hospital for years. Strange (and often funny) things were just the norm.

Could you give some details?

 

[random]

having thoughts of laying down and taking my battering.

lol

 

[COYBL25]

Late one night, whlist working nights over the Christmas period, I came back into the office to hear strange noises coming from the bosses office two doors down.

When I opened the door to see what was going on, there was the boss, totally bladdered , with one of the girls from the office spreadeagled on his desk, him with his keks around his ankles. She saw me, but he didn`t and I just quietly closed the door and let them carry, making myself scarce in the process.

I never said anything to anyone, but a good while later, he came up to me and thanked me for my discretion and told me he wouldn`t forget it.

He was a decent fella and the girl he was with was a top girl too, so it wasn`t really that difficult to keep quiet tbh.

 

[Nymzee]

Late one night, whlist working nights over the Christmas period, I came back into the office to hear strange noises coming from the bosses office two doors down.

When I opened the door to see what was going on, there was the boss, totally bladdered , with one of the girls from the office spreadeagled on his desk, him with his keks around his ankles. She saw me, but he didn`t and I just quietly closed the door and let them carry, making myself scarce in the process.

I never said anything to anyone, but a good while later, he came up to me and thanked me for my discretion and told me he wouldn`t forget it.

He was a decent fella and the girl he was with was a top girl too, so it wasn`t really that difficult to keep quiet tbh.

I'd have asked for a raise.