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The drunk thread

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CrabbyPaddy said:
Hahahahaha it's beyond humiliating looking back the next day. Yeah, tequila is what seems to get me in that sort of state, although thankfully I haven't really came close to that again lol.
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I remember waddling down the footpath in our garden with my sh!tty trousers and underwear to bin them, then coming back into the house to see the horror that awaited in the bathroom where I'd got undressed. Utterly disgusting.
 
Bungle said:
I remember waddling down the footpath in our garden with my sh!tty trousers and underwear to bin them, then coming back into the house to see the horror that awaited in the bathroom where I'd got undressed. Utterly disgusting.
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Oh god. Must've been the kebab.
 
Bungle said:
I had done a load of shots to try and impress a girl, it didn't really work. It's probably just as well I went home alone that night otherwise she'd be scarred for life.
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A mate took a girl back to his house once after a night out and he wet the bed. He got up while she was still asleep went to the fridge and brought up a bottle of Pepsi. He poured the Pepsi all over the bed with the girl still sleeping, she woke up like 'what the hell?' And he just made out he'd been sleep walking. She never came back. Not sure why he told us that story, not met a 25 year old who wets the bed before.
 
CrabbyPaddy said:
Remember getting so drunk when I was 17 on result's night, that I had to get a taxi home from the club at about 10pm, and proceeded to soil myself in the bedroom.

Disgraceful lol
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My claim to fame was being so drunk that I somehow managed to confuse my sister's wardrobe door with the bathroom door and threw up over the entire contents. Cost me a fortune in dry cleaning bills!

I should point out that my sister was away at the time, I was not sleeping with her!
 

MJ1 said:
A mate took a girl back to his house once after a night out and he wet the bed. He got up while she was still asleep went to the fridge and brought up a bottle of Pepsi. He poured the Pepsi all over the bed with the girl still sleeping, she woke up like 'what the hell?' And he just made out he'd been sleep walking. She never came back. Not sure why he told us that story, not met a 25 year old who wets the bed before.
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Great story though.

Another time when my previous mother and father in law were staying over, and we gave up our bedroom for the the night after a drunken party, I got up, bollock naked, and went for a slash. When I got back into the bed and heard.. 'Jim, there's someone in the bed,' I thought how thin the walls must be. Jim answered 'That's me, you daft woman!' and that was followed by 'No, on the other side of the bed!' That's when the penny dropped.

Rather than just declare it was all a big mistake, I slid out of the bed and crawled on my hands and knees towards the door. As I was about to pull it open at the bottom the light came on and there stood Jim. 'What the hell's going on?' he demanded. I stood up, covered my naughty bits and explained it was force of habit that led me back into our bedroom. It certainly wasn't lust that led me there, I may have had my beer goggles on but even then my mother-in-law had a face like a bag of spanners!
 
TyphooToffee said:
Great story though.

Another time when my previous mother and father in law were staying over, and we gave up our bedroom for the the night after a drunken party, I got up, bollock naked, and went for a slash. When I got back into the bed and heard.. 'Jim, there's someone in the bed,' I thought how thin the walls must be. Jim answered 'That's me, you daft woman!' and that was followed by 'No, on the other side of the bed!' That's when the penny dropped.

Rather than just declare it was all a big mistake, I slid out of the bed and crawled on my hands and knees towards the door. As I was about to pull it open at the bottom the light came on and there stood Jim. 'What the hell's going on?' he demanded. I stood up, covered my naughty bits and explained it was force of habit that led me back into our bedroom. It certainly wasn't lust that led me there, I may have had my beer goggles on but even then my mother-in-law had a face like a bag of spanners!
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Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
 

Foot Long Hot Dog said:
I remember hearing a story about a lad who was bevvied on an away trip and he ended up sniffing Bolivian marching powder off another lads ball sack. Can't remember who told me it though....
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Wasn't it his pyar filthy bird? Was it the lad himself or someone else that told us that she took it off everyone else in the bus in the bogs afterwards?
 
TyphooToffee said:
Great story though.

Another time when my previous mother and father in law were staying over, and we gave up our bedroom for the the night after a drunken party, I got up, bollock naked, and went for a slash. When I got back into the bed and heard.. 'Jim, there's someone in the bed,' I thought how thin the walls must be. Jim answered 'That's me, you daft woman!' and that was followed by 'No, on the other side of the bed!' That's when the penny dropped.

Rather than just declare it was all a big mistake, I slid out of the bed and crawled on my hands and knees towards the door. As I was about to pull it open at the bottom the light came on and there stood Jim. 'What the hell's going on?' he demanded. I stood up, covered my naughty bits and explained it was force of habit that led me back into our bedroom. It certainly wasn't lust that led me there, I may have had my beer goggles on but even then my mother-in-law had a face like a bag of spanners!
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Hahahahahahahahah!
 
consuming copious amounts of Stella and trying to dance to Stakker humanoid wasn't the greatest idea last night.

Woke up to a txt from a girl i was with ' Hey you ok, Stakker owned you last night '..... after going back and forth, it explains how i have got an egg the size of the hindenburg on the side of the head. Apparently, Monday night at the bar last night is old skool house music night after 10pm. I face planted dancing to Stakker.

Only on Mondays hey.
 
FTY said:
Wasn't it his pyar filthy bird? Was it the lad himself or someone else that told us that she took it off everyone else in the bus in the bogs afterwards?
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As I remember, the lad in question went out with an Eskimo bird who was a right dirt box and would play the pink piccolo in return for a sniff
 

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