The LCAB Transfer Window Countdown Thread

[Neiler]

Yes. That would be acceptable..and prob lead to a permanent contract??

Stevan Taylor? Is the first name that crosses my mind, last year of contract, transfer listed, younger etc.

 

[kenada_blue]

Yes. That would be acceptable..and prob lead to a permanent contract??

I'd ****** drive him down myself and leave him outside upton park with a bow on.

Also leave a note seein if there were still interested in yak.

 

[Brownie]

I predict NO TRANSFERS


...until 5.13pm tomorrow.

 

[EFCTim Cahill]

Lets all face it, there will be no signings.....that will not stop me from falling ill and staying off work tomora to watch transfer deadline day

 

[Andy M.]

We really need to develop an algorithm for commenting on transfer rumours in the closing days of the transfer window. Feel free to add your suggestions:

1. Is the transfer rumour you want to comment on related to Everton? Y/N

If Y, go to 2; If N, go to 13

2. Is the source of the rumour "a friend who works at JLA", "some bloke from the pub", "my nephew's cousin's aunt" etc.?

If Y, go to 13; If N, go to 3.

3. Is the source the S*n, the Daily Fail or the Mirror?

If Y, go to 13; If N, go to 4

4. Is the source "some fella on [an internet forum] reckons that..." (genuine ITK's like LCAB excepted)?

If Y, go to 13, if N, go to 5

5. Is the rumour about us selling a player?

If Y, go to 6; If N, go to 8

6. Does the player in question fulfill all of the following conditions:
a) Has not signed a contract extension in the last 6 months
b ) Is not currently stalling on negotiations for a contract extension
c) Does not get wages that would be prohibitive for the would-be buyers

If Y, go to 7; If N, go to 13

7. Does the prospective buying fulfill all of the following conditions:
a) Has money to pay the transfer fee and the player's salary
b ) Has a need for a player in this position (does not apply for Man City; NUFC; THFC)
c) Does NOT offer a player as in exchange/as makeweight

If Y, go to 12; If N, go to 13

8. Is the rumour about us buying/getting a player on loan/getting a player on a free?

If Y, go to 9; If N, go to 5

9. Have we sold/loaned any of our current players?

If Y, go to 10; If N, go to 13

10. Has the player in question been linked with Everton in the past 6 transfer windows?

If Y, go to 13, If N, go to 11

11. Is the player currently employed by Man City?

If Y, go to 13, if N, go to 12

12: Go ahead and post

13: Isn't happening.

 

[Damo W]

I think we will get 2 loan signings with options to buy, I think a striker and either a defender or right midfielder (depending on what happens to Yobo).

 

[davek]

I'd ****** drive him down myself and leave him outside upton park with a bow on.

Also leave a note seein if there were still interested in yak.

He needs a change too I reckon. It must be tough for him being seen as well down the pecking order - captain of his country...and the pigeons in Walton could rest easy again.

 

[little curly alan ball]

Yes. That would be acceptable..and prob lead to a permanent contract??

Their stock is not AWFULLY high with us just now , kid .

Lets see the dough and see .

 

[when i score we riot]

I fear for our nigerian contingent. Notice how Yak, Yobo and Anichebe have a total of FECKIN ZERO minutes of gametime between them? They've not even warmed the goddamn bench for one second of competitive gameplay. That does say something, and seeing how they've all been linked (Think i saw some random Anichebe on loan rumours earlier, though they're severely bleach-induced, my original point still stands) with a transfer, this does look rather ominous.

Woe is us! Will the Yak ever be fed again? Will Steve Bruce fancy him with his funny alien-like bulging back-of-the-head? Will we ever field players wearing gloves to keep warm on the pitch in the middle of october? Does anyone know if Yobo speaks french and why he for some reason stopped being better than a former Portsmouth & Shitteh old french hack we all know and reluctantly force ourselves to love because our dearest, dearest Everton are his employer? Will Anichebe ever blossom into a class player like certain Premier League-playing ivorians? Oh, dung beetles! Oh, the serengeti! Oh notorious spammers! Will the children you've bore us together see it fit to leave our old, fragile nest, travelling to the fabled city of Zion at Upton park? And will we be properly paid? For certainly, getting those dozen million recouped is out of the question, Grant must be meshuggah in the head to pay that kind of money! Oh, woe is us! Woe indeed!

And for fecks sake, somebody send Vaughan out on loan. Thank you in advance.

 

[wolf277]

We really need to develop an algorithm for commenting on transfer rumours in the closing days of the transfer window. Feel free to add your suggestions:

1. Is the transfer rumour you want to comment on related to Everton? Y/N

If Y, go to 2; If N, go to 13

2. Is the source of the rumour "a friend who works at JLA", "some bloke from the pub", "my nephew's cousin's aunt" etc.?

If Y, go to 13; If N, go to 3.

3. Is the source the S*n, the Daily Fail or the Mirror?

If Y, go to 13; If N, go to 4

4. Is the source "some fella on [an internet forum] reckons that..." (genuine ITK's like LCAB excepted)?

If Y, go to 13, if N, go to 5

5. Is the rumour about us selling a player?

If Y, go to 6; If N, go to 8

6. Does the player in question fulfill all of the following conditions:
a) Has not signed a contract extension in the last 6 months
b ) Is not currently stalling on negotiations for a contract extension
c) Does not get wages that would be prohibitive for the would-be buyers

If Y, go to 7; If N, go to 13

7. Does the prospective buying fulfill all of the following conditions:
a) Has money to pay the transfer fee and the player's salary
b ) Has a need for a player in this position (does not apply for Man City; NUFC; THFC)
c) Does NOT offer a player as in exchange/as makeweight

If Y, go to 12; If N, go to 13

8. Is the rumour about us buying/getting a player on loan/getting a player on a free?

If Y, go to 9; If N, go to 5

9. Have we sold/loaned any of our current players?

If Y, go to 10; If N, go to 13

10. Has the player in question been linked with Everton in the past 6 transfer windows?

If Y, go to 13, If N, go to 11

11. Is the player currently employed by Man City?

If Y, go to 13, if N, go to 12

12: Go ahead and post

13: Isn't happening.

WOW WHAT THE [Poor language removed] YOU HAVE WAY TOO MUCH TIME ON YOUR HANDS GO AND FIND SOME PORN YOUNG MAN

 

[davek]

Their stock is not AWFULLY high with us just now , kid .

Lets see the dough and see .

Sounds like it's still in the balance then. Feller on the People's Forum reckons it'll be announced tomorrow...I dont think he's the type to tell fibs either.

As ever, though, we go on what you say.

 

[Matt Damon]

Well I'm all out.

Just waiting on LCAB / EL Cid / The Oracle to pop up on here.

But with time being tight, I expect it to be down to 15 minutes notice from the usual one week.

* taps nose.

 

[little curly alan ball]

Sounds like it's still in the balance then. Feller on the People's Forum reckons it'll be announced tomorrow...I dont think he's the type to tell fibs either.

As ever, though, we go on what you say.

Well I'm all out.

Just waiting on LCAB / EL Cid / The Oracle to pop up on here.

But with time being tight, I expect it to be down to 15 minutes notice from the usual one week.

* taps nose.

IF , I hear some definitive , I'll post .

I always have.

Yobo IS available . They want players . Its likely , even .

Alls Im saying is , I havent been told it IS happening .

Mind you its Bank Holiday .

 

[irishblue7]

why the delay if done... perhaps tryin to tie up yak 2... so we can buy????/
carslberg dont do transfer windows but if they did....

 

[ijjysmith]

What time does the window close tomorrow?