Martin Alvito
Player Valuation: £50m
OK, so, I know it's done because I am actually pissing this brown stuff.Bally ten-penny ones dropping in the custard... Charlie Choppers chucking a handful.
I am not joking. The damned thing is gone. Can we all stop joking for a minute? Like, seriously, guys. You're all 'He's a danger' and I'm like, "I have this huge problem, and I can no longer trust my ex and her MD about this stuff." She wants me way deader than Nym, despite the fact that my sister now gets the two million.
Can we have this real conversation where you lot tell me what to do?
Shelly can send them to Harvard with the two million, but come on, guys. Please, for the love of God, do not leave my youngest hanging that way. He is literally the nicest person you will ever meet. He is twelve, and he does not want this. Help a man out.
Apologies for getting that real.