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The new kitchen

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The sink (bought by the missus) is plumbed in. Of course I had to do something to go between the solvent welded pipes and the compression of the sink fittings which are a mm or two different diameter. Ruddy nuisance.

Then the boiling water tap had to be fitted. The input pipe is 9.5mm and the fittings on the rest of the filter system is 10mm. The 10mm speed fit I'd used in the previous installation didn't take well to bring reused resulting in a shower of water hosing me down Ruddy nuisance.

Fortunately my time making boat plumbing cooperate (European and British stsndards) meant I had a 9.5mm brass fitting I could bore out.

There was a terse and stressful couple if hours I couldn't make tea.
 
chrismpw said:
The sink (bought by the missus) is plumbed in. Of course I had to do something to go between the solvent welded pipes and the compression of the sink fittings which are a mm or two different diameter. Ruddy nuisance.

Then the boiling water tap had to be fitted. The input pipe is 9.5mm and the fittings on the rest of the filter system is 10mm. The 10mm speed fit I'd used in the previous installation didn't take well to bring reused resulting in a shower of water hosing me down Ruddy nuisance.

Fortunately my time making boat plumbing cooperate (European and British stsndards) meant I had a 9.5mm brass fitting I could bore out.

There was a terse and stressful couple if hours I couldn't make tea.
Click to expand...
Thanks mate.
Your tales do brighten up ones day considerably. ?
 

chrismpw said:
Thought I'd start a thread to chronicle my endeavours in keeping a happy wife by "freshening up" the kitchen. I'll add to this thread as and when.

It started when we looked for a house 8 years ago. With our budget we had a choice of a tiny ramshackle cottage that needed doing up, with no land, in a tiny village, or a larger 1960s build with large garden and workshop where the house was nicely fitted out and needed nothing doing to it. Even though I enjoy DIY and have gutted and fitted out 3 boats in my time, since I was still working full time as a teacher of science to the great unwashed we went for the house that needed absolutely nothing doing to it. Nothing. Nada.

I had to start decorating almost straight away. ?

Since then I've refitted a bathroom ("no Mrs Chrismpw one does not simply move a toilet to the opposite wall") dividing it to give a laundry room, built cupboards in alcoves, windowsills, rebuilt the asbestos roofed garage and extended it, rebuilt a perfectly good 5m x 5m raised deck with "a nicer looking wood" built a chicken coop, built a veg area with raised beds and meshed it off to protect the wife's efforts from pigeons and built a bbq hut. I've also dismantled the chicken coop when that particular fad waned.

All of these jobs could have been pleasurable of course, but I'm working with Mrs Chrismpw who simply has the dreams and thinks these dreams are designs. It takes a long long time to get a sketch and almost impossible to get a scaled engineering diagram from her. I mean - I could just crack on and do stuff my own way to my own aesthetic - but whereas she has difficulty expressing or knowing what she wants, she is very quick and vocal in saying what she doesn't like - which is practically everything. So ... you know ... Happy wife happy life.

Some time in March 2021 she said, over a cup of tea, that she wanted the kitchen freshening up. My blood ran cold.

More to come.
Click to expand...
Sounds perfectly normal unfortunately
 

Women are famed for having emotions that have a greater range than men. At least that's what I've experienced. The household female however has comparatively few emotions. Well one really if you can call permanent irritation an emorion. Maybe we should call it misery. In all other respects she could be an android. Even after 10 years together I have never seen her do anything much for pleasure. Food is little more than a necessity to her, she barely touches alcohol, denies herself flavour etc. Not what you'd call a party girl. The closest analogy might be she's like Leonard Hofstater 's mother in the Big Bang Theory .... there's little emotion. Add to that lots of over analysis, neurotic behaviour and oceans of negativity and you get the picture. Maybe Marvin the android would be a better comparison.

Why am I describing this? She's been away all week at her ma's. During thus time I've finished the painting, commissioned the sink and dishwasher in the new kitchen, snagged the leaks, installed and levelled the units, made temporary work surfaces, moved in the fridge, taken off the remaining granite surfaces from the old kitchen, removed all the old units and decommissioned the old plumbing. I've also arranged surveys for a chimney installation and chatted to a plasterer. Its a full on week.

So when she walks in and sees the kitchen for the first time, I imagine most living wives would at least coo a few appreciative words, others say nice things, some might be excited or happy. Mine stood there, looked around made a few neutral comments and found fault in the painting I'd done.

I despair.

My next project is going to be a time machine. I'm going back 12 years to have a word with my younger self
 
chrismpw said:
Women are famed for having emotions that have a greater range than men. At least that's what I've experienced. The household female however has comparatively few emotions. Well one really if you can call permanent irritation an emorion. Maybe we should call it misery. In all other respects she could be an android. Even after 10 years together I have never seen her do anything much for pleasure. Food is little more than a necessity to her, she barely touches alcohol, denies herself flavour etc. Not what you'd call a party girl. The closest analogy might be she's like Leonard Hofstater 's mother in the Big Bang Theory .... there's little emotion. Add to that lots of over analysis, neurotic behaviour and oceans of negativity and you get the picture. Maybe Marvin the android would be a better comparison.

Why am I describing this? She's been away all week at her ma's. During thus time I've finished the painting, commissioned the sink and dishwasher in the new kitchen, snagged the leaks, installed and levelled the units, made temporary work surfaces, moved in the fridge, taken off the remaining granite surfaces from the old kitchen, removed all the old units and decommissioned the old plumbing. I've also arranged surveys for a chimney installation and chatted to a plasterer. Its a full on week.

So when she walks in and sees the kitchen for the first time, I imagine most living wives would at least coo a few appreciative words, others say nice things, some might be excited or happy. Mine stood there, looked around made a few neutral comments and found fault in the painting I'd done.

I despair.

My next project is going to be a time machine. I'm going back 12 years to have a word with my younger self
Click to expand...

This is the usual reaction I believe, lucky you didn't get the favourite rolled out "is that all you've managed to do?"
 
chrismpw said:
Women are famed for having emotions that have a greater range than men. At least that's what I've experienced. The household female however has comparatively few emotions. Well one really if you can call permanent irritation an emorion. Maybe we should call it misery. In all other respects she could be an android. Even after 10 years together I have never seen her do anything much for pleasure. Food is little more than a necessity to her, she barely touches alcohol, denies herself flavour etc. Not what you'd call a party girl. The closest analogy might be she's like Leonard Hofstater 's mother in the Big Bang Theory .... there's little emotion. Add to that lots of over analysis, neurotic behaviour and oceans of negativity and you get the picture. Maybe Marvin the android would be a better comparison.

Why am I describing this? She's been away all week at her ma's. During thus time I've finished the painting, commissioned the sink and dishwasher in the new kitchen, snagged the leaks, installed and levelled the units, made temporary work surfaces, moved in the fridge, taken off the remaining granite surfaces from the old kitchen, removed all the old units and decommissioned the old plumbing. I've also arranged surveys for a chimney installation and chatted to a plasterer. Its a full on week.

So when she walks in and sees the kitchen for the first time, I imagine most living wives would at least coo a few appreciative words, others say nice things, some might be excited or happy. Mine stood there, looked around made a few neutral comments and found fault in the painting I'd done.

I despair.

My next project is going to be a time machine. I'm going back 12 years to have a word with my younger self
Click to expand...
Love you Chris.
 

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