Anyone having a worse day than me?

[Tommy Chong]

Glad you're well mate.
Can we have some pictures of your anus now so we can see how it's coped?

The description: ‘Throwing a hotdog down a hallway’ comes to mind…

 

[tommye]

The description: ‘Throwing a hotdog down a hallway’ comes to mind…

 

[ClausThomsen]

Still don't know what this is, but I strongly suspect I should not use Google.

Another event from today - when a nurse (for want of a better title) said to me that they inflate the bowel with CO2 and that it was OK to fart.

Well tell me just how exactly do you fart while your trap door is stuffed full of pipe?

Again ... not a time for Google.

 

[peteblue]

A thread for those of us wishing to offload (in my case, literally).

In sure some of you are, for whatever serious reason - but this is my day today:

Tomorrow morning I'm having a routine procedure - an examination - because of family history. Since Saturday I've nit been allowed ANY of my favourite foods. All I've been allowed to eat is beige.

Today at 10 am I ate the last food I'm permitted for 24 hours. At 6pm I have to start drinking a litre of cold wallpaper paste. I will be shitting regularly - the leaflet promises 12-15 toilet visits.

At 5am, amidst broken-toilet-visit-sleep, no doubt, I have to down another litre of slush before more explosive visits to the bog.

At 9am tomorrow I get a camera shoved up my arse and get inflated like a very unhappy balloon. I'm hoping the camera crew is tiny and that there us no need for a sound crew.

In the midst of all this , in case it wasnt bad enough, there's a Derby game.

Cheer me up, for pity's sake.

Hell of a thread Chris…what are you doing for an encore……..

 

[carlos21]

Nor the car keys I lost 4 years ago.

How are you feeling tonight.

 

[Dixieslaces]

Cheers. Just a small polyp removed (sent for testing obvs) - quite common it seems. I've no symptoms, it's just something on the family routine since it was bowel cancer (unnoticed) that sadly saw my dad off.

Good to hear mate.

Have to be honest, your Threads challenge @chicoazul for amusement factor.


Miss your kitchen shenanigans, needs a bump surely?

All the best

 

[chrismpw]

Hell of a thread Chris…what are you doing for an encore……..

Well this evening, still inflated, I went to an organ recital at the town church. Some bloke from Rennes cathedral was playing. My bowels harmonised loudly with the low C pipes at one point, but I think I got away with it.

 

[chrismpw]

How are you feeling tonight.

Fine tonight thanks Carlos. After fasting 24 hours I've scoffed a pasty, curry and trifle to make up for it.

 

[Dixieslaces]

Well this evening, still inflated, I went to an organ recital at the town church. Some bloke from Rennes cathedral was playing. My bowels harmonised loudly with the low C pipes at one point, but I think I got away with it.

 

[carlos21]

Fine tonight thanks Carlos. After fasting 24 hours I've scoffed a pasty, curry and trifle to make up for it.

Well done mate.

 

[SerenityNigh]

A thread for those of us wishing to offload (in my case, literally).

In sure some of you are, for whatever serious reason - but this is my day today:

Tomorrow morning I'm having a routine procedure - an examination - because of family history. Since Saturday I've nit been allowed ANY of my favourite foods. All I've been allowed to eat is beige.

Today at 10 am I ate the last food I'm permitted for 24 hours. At 6pm I have to start drinking a litre of cold wallpaper paste. I will be shitting regularly - the leaflet promises 12-15 toilet visits.

At 5am, amidst broken-toilet-visit-sleep, no doubt, I have to down another litre of slush before more explosive visits to the bog.

At 9am tomorrow I get a camera shoved up my arse and get inflated like a very unhappy balloon. I'm hoping the camera crew is tiny and that there us no need for a sound crew.

In the midst of all this , in case it wasnt bad enough, there's a Derby game.

Cheer me up, for pity's sake.

Pics? How'd it all go then? If it makes you feel better, when I had my over-40 scope the drink they gave me actually tasted good. However I farted lube for 3 days following.

 

[chicoazul]

Cheers. Just a small polyp removed (sent for testing obvs) - quite common it seems. I've no symptoms, it's just something on the family routine since it was bowel cancer (unnoticed) that sadly saw my dad off.

Had the same a couple of years ago mate, I’ll be sound, they just test them to see if they’re the type that may become a problem later in life. The same disease took my Mum too. Important everyone gets symptoms checked out and does the check ups the doctors ask them for when compulsory.

 

[Pootsy]

 

[chrismpw]

My back muscles ache today ... I mean really ache, like legs do after a run, or a game of footie. I can only put this down to the rigid rictus state, arching my back, that I spent 30 minutes in yesterday having things inserted where nature didn't intend.

 

[Rita_Poon]

My back muscles ache today ... I mean really ache, like legs do after a run, or a game of footie. I can only put this down to the rigid rictus state, arching my back, that I spent 30 minutes in yesterday having things inserted where nature didn't intend.

You've come through it, been a trooper, had your curly wurly, and been brave enough to share on here. So long as things go your way, you earned your A* for being brave. And just think how much pizza and beer you can refill on now....