Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[andy4efc]

Honestly , just want to say a huge Thankyou to everyone who’s reached out, I apologise for causing anyone concern. Genuinely overwhelmed with comments and messages of support , made me realise that I’m not on my own and there are plenty of you good guys out there. … I always knew this thread was important, well now I know just how important it is first hand so again, big Thankyou and much love to you all x

No apologies needed tbh.

It's exactly what the thread is for.

 

[andy4efc]

I feel like in such a bad place at the moment. I feel so isolated from the world, i have co-workers who show no real interest in socialising out of work but have no hesitation in putting stuff on me in work when I’m loaded with stuff to do. I have no real release at the moment in gaming, have footy once a week and even then the other week I had an anxiety attack before playing. Literally just fresh from a four day trip in wales with the wife and doesnt feel like it has done anything to help. I’ve just quit smoking a month ago, no trouble, quit gambling about 16 months ago, no trouble (although it does feel an urge) and yet constantly feel trapped or isolated.

Constantly reminded I have absolutely nobody other than my wife, my family are tiny, my two brothers don’t ever get in touch unless they want something. Massively undervalued in work but have no way out because I’m on a wage thats alright big picture but they’ve not got me any qualifications where I could actually apply for jobs in a similar field so if I want to leave I’ll have to take a pay cut which is just unaffordable. In a company that take short cuts, commit some very dodgy things. Tried to get myself out there with local clubs to try and help lose weight but nobody taking me up on just being an extra goalkeeper in training or even just help doing drills for goalkeepers. I’ve got Wednesday - Friday off work and was going to hammer Warzone 2.0 but I find myself now in a position, through no lack of effort likely to be on my own and I just won’t play it, even though it’s a wonderful release and escape. I can’t play with strangers, my anxiety won’t allow it.

Genuinely just in that horrible position of being isolated and trapped. Despite making huge efforts socially in the past couple of years, working on myself but never appearing to be good enough. It speaks volumes to my life I have nobody other than my wife to speak about these things and I don’t like putting it all on her because she just wants to fix it and help but she literally can’t despite her naturally good hearted soul.

Alongside all this. Yesterdays events;

Work issues people calling in sick convieniently for England, extremely stressful.

Dad had a check up on his bowels and had 'abnormal results' in relation to cancer.
Mother had a fall while taking one of the dogs the vets, nose busted wide open, vets had a look and dont think its broken but black eye(s), she is 67 and starting to get weaker but she just wont stop doing things.
She was at the vets because of one of the dogs being diagnosed with a growth of some sort but no idea yet any indication of whether its benign or malignant.

All coming at once. I have such a small family, no real connection with brothers or interaction - they get in touch when they want something. It's like I can foresee what's about to happen. We aren't the luckiest family, and I remind myself Dad had grim reaper on his door in 2001 when he was smashed into by a pompus actor driving carelessly on a country road, he should not be alive now. We're lucky to have him but I can see his body just eventually saying, enough is enough now. He's had surgery in the hours of the hundreds, his toes were pointing back up at him after he was crushed. It's constnatly on my mind that one day, his body will just say, that's it we're done. We've done well but time is time.

I TRY not to worry about things that are out of my control, but it's becoming remarkably difficult and worrying, I'm home from work and already just about to go to bed, after going to bed at at 6 yesterday. I had an accident in work yesterday with a whiteboard falling and smacking me on teh neck/shoulder, so thought it was just a bit of that but feel like lacking any interest in hobbies at present, not even the childish things like Warzone, Fm etc.

 

[andy4efc]

@COYBL25 you are always the first in this thread, always quick, without neccesserily responding to make people feel they're heard or acknowledged.

Tremendous.

 

[COYBL25]

@COYBL25 you are always the first in this thread, always quick, without neccesserily responding to make people feel they're heard or acknowledged.

Tremendous.

It`s always the first thread I look for mate.

To me, it`s the most important thread on the whole forum.

When I wasn`t well, I felt just like you do now, as everything just seemed to slowly unravel and turn to rat, but it does get better mate. I can promise you that.

 

[David09]

Alongside all this. Yesterdays events;

Work issues people calling in sick convieniently for England, extremely stressful.

Dad had a check up on his bowels and had 'abnormal results' in relation to cancer.
Mother had a fall while taking one of the dogs the vets, nose busted wide open, vets had a look and dont think its broken but black eye(s), she is 67 and starting to get weaker but she just wont stop doing things.
She was at the vets because of one of the dogs being diagnosed with a growth of some sort but no idea yet any indication of whether its benign or malignant.

All coming at once. I have such a small family, no real connection with brothers or interaction - they get in touch when they want something. It's like I can foresee what's about to happen. We aren't the luckiest family, and I remind myself Dad had grim reaper on his door in 2001 when he was smashed into by a pompus actor driving carelessly on a country road, he should not be alive now. We're lucky to have him but I can see his body just eventually saying, enough is enough now. He's had surgery in the hours of the hundreds, his toes were pointing back up at him after he was crushed. It's constnatly on my mind that one day, his body will just say, that's it we're done. We've done well but time is time.

I TRY not to worry about things that are out of my control, but it's becoming remarkably difficult and worrying, I'm home from work and already just about to go to bed, after going to bed at at 6 yesterday. I had an accident in work yesterday with a whiteboard falling and smacking me on teh neck/shoulder, so thought it was just a bit of that but feel like lacking any interest in hobbies at present, not even the childish things like Warzone, Fm etc.

Andy I used to stress and worry like you after my marriage ended.
I would beat myself up when my daughter would say she was to busy to pop and see me for a cup of tea. I would go to bed early and do nothing with my weekends.
But now as long as I'm working hard and I've enough money to pay my bills I just don't stress or argue with anyone.
I sleep a lot , read a little, go for a run/walk and listen to music.
I have a big family who I see occasionally but I don't worry about what there doing and they probably don't worry much about me.
Just take each day as it comes mate.

 

[tommye]

@COYBL25 you are always the first in this thread, always quick, without neccesserily responding to make people feel they're heard or acknowledged.

Tremendous.

A Saint amongst men.


?

 

[anjelikaferrett]

Alongside all this. Yesterdays events;

Work issues people calling in sick convieniently for England, extremely stressful.

Dad had a check up on his bowels and had 'abnormal results' in relation to cancer.
Mother had a fall while taking one of the dogs the vets, nose busted wide open, vets had a look and dont think its broken but black eye(s), she is 67 and starting to get weaker but she just wont stop doing things.
She was at the vets because of one of the dogs being diagnosed with a growth of some sort but no idea yet any indication of whether its benign or malignant.

All coming at once. I have such a small family, no real connection with brothers or interaction - they get in touch when they want something. It's like I can foresee what's about to happen. We aren't the luckiest family, and I remind myself Dad had grim reaper on his door in 2001 when he was smashed into by a pompus actor driving carelessly on a country road, he should not be alive now. We're lucky to have him but I can see his body just eventually saying, enough is enough now. He's had surgery in the hours of the hundreds, his toes were pointing back up at him after he was crushed. It's constnatly on my mind that one day, his body will just say, that's it we're done. We've done well but time is time.

I TRY not to worry about things that are out of my control, but it's becoming remarkably difficult and worrying, I'm home from work and already just about to go to bed, after going to bed at at 6 yesterday. I had an accident in work yesterday with a whiteboard falling and smacking me on teh neck/shoulder, so thought it was just a bit of that but feel like lacking any interest in hobbies at present, not even the childish things like Warzone, Fm etc.

That's an awful lot to deal with all at once. It easy to say don't worry about things you can't control but much harder to actually do it. I also think we all have a tendency to look at worst case scenarios. Maybe take one day ay a time. Set yourself a little goal, nothing too strenuous. I don't know what Warzone is but can you say today I'm going to do one thing on the game.

Keep talking to folk on here too - there's always somebody who will talk to you x

 

[anjelikaferrett]

Honestly , just want to say a huge Thankyou to everyone who’s reached out, I apologise for causing anyone concern. Genuinely overwhelmed with comments and messages of support , made me realise that I’m not on my own and there are plenty of you good guys out there. … I always knew this thread was important, well now I know just how important it is first hand so again, big Thankyou and much love to you all x

Sorry you are not feeling great Kurt, I missed your original post. Hope you are feeling a bit better x

 

[Kurt.]

Sorry you are not feeling great Kurt, I missed your original post. Hope you are feeling a bit better x

Thankyou, todays been a good day.. very productive and the first day in a long time I woke up feeling good about things.. no sense of doom and gloom and no black cloud … hopefully through the worst of it thanks to all on here … a special mention to those who have gone out of their way and given up their time to contact me personally, I won’t embarrass them by naming names but they know who they are and hopefully they know how in debt I am to them all xx

 

[Kurt.]

Alongside all this. Yesterdays events;

Work issues people calling in sick convieniently for England, extremely stressful.

Dad had a check up on his bowels and had 'abnormal results' in relation to cancer.
Mother had a fall while taking one of the dogs the vets, nose busted wide open, vets had a look and dont think its broken but black eye(s), she is 67 and starting to get weaker but she just wont stop doing things.
She was at the vets because of one of the dogs being diagnosed with a growth of some sort but no idea yet any indication of whether its benign or malignant.

All coming at once. I have such a small family, no real connection with brothers or interaction - they get in touch when they want something. It's like I can foresee what's about to happen. We aren't the luckiest family, and I remind myself Dad had grim reaper on his door in 2001 when he was smashed into by a pompus actor driving carelessly on a country road, he should not be alive now. We're lucky to have him but I can see his body just eventually saying, enough is enough now. He's had surgery in the hours of the hundreds, his toes were pointing back up at him after he was crushed. It's constnatly on my mind that one day, his body will just say, that's it we're done. We've done well but time is time.

I TRY not to worry about things that are out of my control, but it's becoming remarkably difficult and worrying, I'm home from work and already just about to go to bed, after going to bed at at 6 yesterday. I had an accident in work yesterday with a whiteboard falling and smacking me on teh neck/shoulder, so thought it was just a bit of that but feel like lacking any interest in hobbies at present, not even the childish things like Warzone, Fm etc.

Mate, I feel your pain and understand what you’re going through, I suffered alone for a long time but this week I reached out to people and told the truth and within 3 days I’m already feeling better … I’ve worked bloody hard trying to keep positive and I know it’s not easy but believe me mate the dark days do start to get brighter, I’m not out of the woods just yet but I can see the light and I’m fighting every day to get there.. people on here have been brilliantly towards me too which is very humbling .. think what I’m trying to say is you’ve done the hardest part by speaking out , much love to you mate and if you ever need a chat just DM me xxx stay strong xx

 

[Woolverhampton_Blue]

After a few weeks sober and in AA I relapsed, badly. Girlfriend is in hospital having major surgery and I didn’t go and see her because I was [Poor language removed] up.

Looked in her bedside table for something and found photos and letters from her ex. No issue with her having them, but it cut me up regardless.

Only reprieve is no Everton until December.

 

[larbert toffee]

Thankyou, todays been a good day.. very productive and the first day in a long time I woke up feeling good about things.. no sense of doom and gloom and no black cloud … hopefully through the worst of it thanks to all on here … a special mention to those who have gone out of their way and given up their time to contact me personally, I won’t embarrass them by naming names but they know who they are and hopefully they know how in debt I am to them all xx

Glad you're in a better place today Kurt, onwards and upwards mate.

 

[Gwladysover]

I have come to the conclusion to finally give up on the ale and just stick to Heineken zero or coke. Anytime I have a drink, the next day I feel absolutley awful and back to square one. I was out Saturday and threw up quite a lot yesterday, I don't think mixing alcohol with Sertraline is a good idea. Anyone here give up drinking before? I don't have a problem, can take it or leave it but noticed how I feel the day/days after it.

I gave up drinking about ten years ago due to medical advice. I wasn’t a big drinker, just social but I did miss it. I didn’t miss the morning after headache and queasiness, something that only troubled me as I got older. GP has said that I could have a drink occasionally now but the thought of the headache next morning is enough to put me off. It’s just not worth it.

 

[Gwladysover]

Alongside all this. Yesterdays events;

Work issues people calling in sick convieniently for England, extremely stressful.

Dad had a check up on his bowels and had 'abnormal results' in relation to cancer.
Mother had a fall while taking one of the dogs the vets, nose busted wide open, vets had a look and dont think its broken but black eye(s), she is 67 and starting to get weaker but she just wont stop doing things.
She was at the vets because of one of the dogs being diagnosed with a growth of some sort but no idea yet any indication of whether its benign or malignant.

All coming at once. I have such a small family, no real connection with brothers or interaction - they get in touch when they want something. It's like I can foresee what's about to happen. We aren't the luckiest family, and I remind myself Dad had grim reaper on his door in 2001 when he was smashed into by a pompus actor driving carelessly on a country road, he should not be alive now. We're lucky to have him but I can see his body just eventually saying, enough is enough now. He's had surgery in the hours of the hundreds, his toes were pointing back up at him after he was crushed. It's constnatly on my mind that one day, his body will just say, that's it we're done. We've done well but time is time.

I TRY not to worry about things that are out of my control, but it's becoming remarkably difficult and worrying, I'm home from work and already just about to go to bed, after going to bed at at 6 yesterday. I had an accident in work yesterday with a whiteboard falling and smacking me on teh neck/shoulder, so thought it was just a bit of that but feel like lacking any interest in hobbies at present, not even the childish things like Warzone, Fm etc.

Bit late but I am only just catching up with the thread . So sorry that things are difficult for you at the moment. I can only echo what others have said re worry and taking each day at a time. Best wishes.?

 

[Gwladysover]

Mate, I feel your pain and understand what you’re going through, I suffered alone for a long time but this week I reached out to people and told the truth and within 3 days I’m already feeling better … I’ve worked bloody hard trying to keep positive and I know it’s not easy but believe me mate the dark days do start to get brighter, I’m not out of the woods just yet but I can see the light and I’m fighting every day to get there.. people on here have been brilliantly towards me too which is very humbling .. think what I’m trying to say is you’ve done the hardest part by speaking out , much love to you mate and if you ever need a chat just DM me xxx stay strong xx

Re my other post regarding just catching up with the thread, missed your first post, however I‘m so glad to read that you are feeling better, long may it continue.?