Have decided to sign myself off work for a week, my mind is just far too scrambled at the moment and being in that unhappy environment is only making it worse.
I've considered doing this quite a few times before but previously refrained because I instead decided to just try to plough on and that it was just a crappy phase I'd get through. Also because I didn't want to leave my employers in the lurch with my sudden absence, I know they'll struggle without me. Today though all that went out the window, I've had enough of putting other arsehole people's convenience before my own wellbeing.
A friend of mine had requested next weekend off so he could spend a few days away with his girlfriend for her 21st. It was point-blank refused despite him giving them plenty of notice. We found out today that management have given several other workers, people who don't pull their weight whatsoever but are part of the "in crowd", that weekend off on spur of the moment notice. Simply so this lot can go out and get plastered whilst watching the boxing and not have to come in hungover. On top of that they've put me and friend's names down on the rotor (without asking us first) to cover these people's hours. Absolutely no chance, I've rubbed my name off and they can get to F.
I've been in a bad way and not made the necessary steps to get myself feeling better. I'm making them now and the first one is having time to myself to get my head clear again, away from certain people who automatically put me in a bad mood with the way they behave. To hell with the job, I'm not resigning (I am applying elsewhere) but I'm taking a full yard off them, not an inch. I feel I've earnt the right with how hard I work compared to certain others. It's about time I thumbed my nose back at them the way they do at me and certain other workers who break our backs but get treated like garbage. I hope with a little break where I can do some constructive things I will raise my mood levels and stop beating myself up so much about the state of my life.