Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[SiEdmo]

No idea mate, been the same for years and whilst i don't feel great about making my excuses and running I'll still do it. There's no specific event related to Christmas that causes it, I'd just rather be on my own. It used to bother me a lot more than it now does, I think I've come to terms over the years with the fact that actually I just like to be on my own which sounds a bit tragic but that's how it is.

not tragic at all mate, xmas is the only time of year some people get a decent few days off work (without it being off with the kids for half term etc specifically) so for some people its their only chance to have a bit of alone time,

I need alone time a lot, as obviously do you, certain people just re-charge better alone than around social gatherings etc etc

me and my Mrs fall out every weekend coz I stay up til all hours, she just doesn't know that me being awake when most of the city is asleep is the only real time I feel alone, and time to myself

 

[COYBL25]

Absolutely hate it mate, If it wasn't for the kids I'd make no effort at all. I quite often leave any family events earlier than anyone else and have even come home and spent Christmas night on my own quite a few times, I'll no doubt make my excuses and do the same again this year as well.

I'm 100% with you on this.

I used to volunteer to work nights over Christmas, when I worked shifts, so that I could avoid the majority of it.

My side of the family aren't arsed about Christmas, that's the way I was brought up.

My missus side of the family are the complete opposite, although a lot of it involves getting bladdered.

There's been a few occasions when I've taken the kids out to the park for a few hours on Christmas Day, just to get away from their inane drunken faux sentimentality.

They're staying for three nights this year and I'm dreading it.

 

[COYBL25]

not tragic at all mate, xmas is the only time of year some people get a decent few days off work (without it being off with the kids for half term etc specifically) so for some people its their only chance to have a bit of alone time,

I need alone time a lot, as obviously do you, certain people just re-charge better alone than around social gatherings etc etc

me and my Mrs fall out every weekend coz I stay up til all hours, she just doesn't know that me being awake when most of the city is asleep is the only real time I feel alone, and time to myself

Bit leffield this mate, big have you thought about going running late at night, after everyone's gone to bed ?

I can't anymore because of the kids, but I used to find running when the roads were empty very calming and almost therapeutic

 

[Groucho]

not tragic at all mate, xmas is the only time of year some people get a decent few days off work (without it being off with the kids for half term etc specifically) so for some people its their only chance to have a bit of alone time,

I need alone time a lot, as obviously do you, certain people just re-charge better alone than around social gatherings etc etc

me and my Mrs fall out every weekend coz I stay up til all hours, she just doesn't know that me being awake when most of the city is asleep is the only real time I feel alone, and time to myself

Bit leffield this mate, big have you thought about going running late at night, after everyone's gone to bed ?

I can't anymore because of the kids, but I used to find running when the roads were empty very calming and almost therapeutic

Careful though.

There’s mean folk out at night.

 

[COYBL25]

Careful though.

There’s mean folk out at night.

Most are incapable of walking let alone running that late at night lol

 

[Prevenger17]

No idea mate, been the same for years and whilst i don't feel great about making my excuses and running I'll still do it. There's no specific event related to Christmas that causes it, I'd just rather be on my own. It used to bother me a lot more than it now does, I think I've come to terms over the years with the fact that actually I just like to be on my own which sounds a bit tragic but that's how it is.

I do understand, I prefer solitude myself.

There's been a few occasions when I've taken the kids out to the park for a few hours on Christmas Day, just to get away from their inane drunken faux sentimentality.

Aye, that's grating. We don't go in for that in my own family, so that's nice. My sister is coming home from Australia this year though, so I'm genuinely excited about that.

 

[COYBL25]

I do understand, I prefer solitude myself.





Aye, that's grating. We don't go in for that in my own family, so that's nice. My sister is coming home from Australia this year though, so I'm genuinely excited about that.

Things like your sister coming over are what makes Christmas a wonderful time of year, plus it's ace for kids and elderly relatives too.

Personally I'd just rather rent a cottage somewhere out of the way and just lock the door on it all.

 

[Bungle]

I'm 100% with you on this.

I used to volunteer to work nights over Christmas, when I worked shifts, so that I could avoid the majority of it.

My side of the family aren't arsed about Christmas, that's the way I was brought up.

My missus side of the family are the complete opposite, although a lot of it involves getting bladdered.

There's been a few occasions when I've taken the kids out to the park for a few hours on Christmas Day, just to get away from their inane drunken faux sentimentality.

They're staying for three nights this year and I'm dreading it.

Yep I'll be working most of Christmas and am thankful for it as there'll be me and probably only one other person in the office.

The faux sentimentality is a great shout as well, every family has their own little traditions but some are just so forced to try and conform to what people think Christmas should be about, it's another thing that social media grabs hold of and turns into a competition to see who can post the biggest pile of tat they've bought for their kids or partner as well.

 

[SiEdmo]

Careful though.

There’s mean folk out at night.

yeah this is probably why I wouldn't, my next door neighbour got stabbed and beat up on his doorstep not long ago so im a little weary of going out in the night

 

[efcforever]

Yep I'll be working most of Christmas and am thankful for it as there'll be me and probably only one other person in the office.

The faux sentimentality is a great shout as well, every family has their own little traditions but some are just so forced to try and conform to what people think Christmas should be about, it's another thing that social media grabs hold of and turns into a competition to see who can post the biggest pile of tat they've bought for their kids or partner as well.

Agreed completely with the 2nd paragraph. It sort of turns into a competition to see who can 'win' Christmas.

 

[efcforever]

How do you all feel about this time of year? I really want to enjoy it, but I just can't feel happy around Christmas time anymore. This leads to me feeling awful throughout all of January because I'm wasting memories, which I can't afford to do with having some very old family members.

I think it's alot of pressure. Pressure to enjoy yourself and be super happy even if you don't feel like it. I'd gotten to a point where I hated it. Since my daughter was born I enjoy it alot more as we just put the focus on her.

Having a young child also gets me our of New Year's Eve which I used to dread.

 

[Bungle]

Agreed completely with the 2nd paragraph. It sort of turns into a competition to see who can 'win' Christmas.

It's terrible for making people pine for things that others supposedly have and that doesn't just apply to Christmas either. I've previously seen people who I know post on Facebook about their holidays, romantic gestures from their other half and showing off big purchases, yet the reality is they're heavily in debt and constantly cheating on each other, but they portray this image to anyone looking that life is perfect.

I've been on the receiving end of comments like "Oh I wish you were more romantic like that", or "Wish we could get away somewhere for a few weeks" and it just heaps pressure on people to live up to something that isn't reality for the most part. It's crazy that that kind of thing can play a big part in someones mental wellbeing but it's brought on by something which is completely false in the majority of cases.

I don't even know if that makes sense but it's a huge reason I'm not on Facebook and try to avoid stuff like that because it sets me off on a rant.

 

[efcforever]

It's terrible for making people pine for things that others supposedly have and that doesn't just apply to Christmas either. I've previously seen people who I know post on Facebook about their holidays, romantic gestures from their other half and showing off big purchases, yet the reality is they're heavily in debt and constantly cheating on each other, but they portray this image to anyone looking that life is perfect.

I've been on the receiving end of comments like "Oh I wish you were more romantic like that", or "Wish we could get away somewhere for a few weeks" and it just heaps pressure on people to live up to something that isn't reality for the most part. It's crazy that that kind of thing can play a big part in someones mental wellbeing but it's brought on by something which is completely false in the majority of cases.

I don't even know if that makes sense but it's a huge reason I'm not on Facebook and try to avoid stuff like that because it sets me off on a rant.

It makes a lot of sense mate. I avoid Facebook for these reasons now. In the past I had been sucked in and it used to make me feel quite bad. I eventually came to the conclusion that if people are having to constantly tell you how great their life is, then in reality it can't be that great.

I think it's natural to compare yourself to your peers and quick scroll through Facebook will make you feel as if everyone as has it better.

 

[COYBL25]

It's terrible for making people pine for things that others supposedly have and that doesn't just apply to Christmas either. I've previously seen people who I know post on Facebook about their holidays, romantic gestures from their other half and showing off big purchases, yet the reality is they're heavily in debt and constantly cheating on each other, but they portray this image to anyone looking that life is perfect.

I've been on the receiving end of comments like "Oh I wish you were more romantic like that", or "Wish we could get away somewhere for a few weeks" and it just heaps pressure on people to live up to something that isn't reality for the most part. It's crazy that that kind of thing can play a big part in someones mental wellbeing but it's brought on by something which is completely false in the majority of cases.

I don't even know if that makes sense but it's a huge reason I'm not on Facebook and try to avoid stuff like that because it sets me off on a rant.

Spot on.

Facebook to me is like the fella in the pub, that tells everyone he's got all kinds of women on the go.

The reality is, he hates his missus and his life and clings onto any munter that shows an interest in him.

 

[Bungle]

It makes a lot of sense mate. I avoid Facebook for these reasons now. In the past I had been sucked in and it used to make me feel quite bad. I eventually came to the conclusion that if people are having to constantly tell you how great their life is, then in reality it can't be that great.

I think it's natural to compare yourself to your peers and quick scroll through Facebook will make you feel as if everyone as has it better.

Spot on.

Facebook to me is like the fella in the pub, that tells everyone he's got all kinds of women on the go.

The reality is, he hates his missus and his life and clings onto any munter that shows an interest in him.

I should start an account with dreary status updates and crushing reality checks so you'll feel like your life is far better come the end of my timeline.

Or you could just head into the Ale House and read my posts, same thing.