Billy Dean
Player Valuation: £70m
Agreed, it would bring so many benefits. It would make it possible to regulate and therefore make safe for use.
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Agreed, it would bring so many benefits. It would make it possible to regulate and therefore make safe for use.
goodisonopheliac
Player Valuation: £30m
Been signed off work for 2 weeks with stress. I'm not going into details as it's tl;dr but basically, my colleagues and I don't get on, and I'd say I've been bullied a few times. Two women I work with are notorious for being horrible to others. Anyhoo, I had a bad fibromyalgia flare-up last week, I found out at the last minute I was moving departments - I'm autistic and I do not take change well - and to top it off, I'd been getting abuse from DFLA members online and found out a former friend had cancer. Possibly terminal as it's metastasised. On Wednesday, one of the evil colleagues had a go at me over a letter, and I just burst into tears and told her to leave me alone, and they all told me to go home but I just wanted to do my typing and they kept going on at me, and it got so bad my line manager got involved and I was crying so much I couldn't talk, so he signed me off the rest of the week. My hands were shaking for ages and I had a disassociative episode in the Co-Op. It was frightening.
Since that day, I've had constant headaches, trouble sleeping, and I just can't stop crying. I think it's PMS, which doesn't help, but things have been bad at work for a while. No-one wants to speak out against these women because they have a lot of power in the department - they're not managers but have been in the NHS for donkey's. Even leaving the house is difficult, or having conversations - on Wednesday a bloke from the RNIB stopped me in the supermarket and bang, I started wailing and crying. It was so embarrassing. I burst into tears at the doctor's this morning as well because I'd been phoning and phoning and couldn't get an appointment, but they managed to squeeze me in. I at least managed to get to John Carpenter last night despite a panic attack, and I can take basic care of myself and my cat, but I look awful and all I want to do is sleep. Occupational Health will want to see me at some point.
Since that day, I've had constant headaches, trouble sleeping, and I just can't stop crying. I think it's PMS, which doesn't help, but things have been bad at work for a while. No-one wants to speak out against these women because they have a lot of power in the department - they're not managers but have been in the NHS for donkey's. Even leaving the house is difficult, or having conversations - on Wednesday a bloke from the RNIB stopped me in the supermarket and bang, I started wailing and crying. It was so embarrassing. I burst into tears at the doctor's this morning as well because I'd been phoning and phoning and couldn't get an appointment, but they managed to squeeze me in. I at least managed to get to John Carpenter last night despite a panic attack, and I can take basic care of myself and my cat, but I look awful and all I want to do is sleep. Occupational Health will want to see me at some point.
A lot of autistic children love animals because the find them easier to relate to than people. Adults as well - Chris Packham springs to mind.
Hi, sorry to hear about all this, sounds like a rather overwhelming catalagoue of issues for you at the moment. Just curious about what your line manager did/is doing after what happened? You say these two women have power in terms of experience but surely your line manager is above them and can do something about it? Doesn't matter to me how experienced someone is - everyone at work is replaceable. No one should be made to work in a toxic environment.
Does your manager and colleagues know about your fibromyalgia and autism? Both of those conditions should see you covered by the Equality Act in that work have to make reasonable adjustments for you. So, if as you say you don't take change very well, they should either not move you pr make the change as painless and smooth as possible. Maybe give you a chance to go to your new department prior to moving so you can see where you will be sitting, meet your new colleagues etc. Certainly not drop it on you at the last minute. They have absolutely failed in their obligations to you. You need to put a report of what happened in your accident book. Although your current feelings are not entirely caused by work, your working environment has made things worse and as such there is an element of work related stress. I would insist on an Occupational Health meeting. They can be very beneficial - especially if you introduce duty of care into your conversation and failure to make reasonable adjustments. If you have face to face meetings with Occ Health then I would take somebody with you - as a reasonable adjustment. Feeling the way you do right now, you will need some support when you speak to them. when you do go back to work ask for a phased return - build up to your full hours over a period of time - with no loss of pay obviously. And insist on having any sick discounted from your record because they caused how you are feeling.
Hope this helps
goodisonopheliac
Player Valuation: £30m
I've been referred to OH, which is good because I wanted to talk to them.
goodisonopheliac
Player Valuation: £30m
He's quite new and younger than all of us, and they don't take him seriously.
SiEdmo
Player Valuation: £10m
who doesn't? the "experienced" women? surely they have to take him seriously is he is their superior (whether he is their line manager too or not)
I know the exact type of people you are talking about, horrible horrible entitled......so and sos
goodisonopheliac
Player Valuation: £30m
Yep. I think it's cos they've been there long enough, they think rules don't apply to them. One of them spent 15 MINUTES testing her ringtones in the office. If I'd have done that, I'd be in deep trouble. She spends ages on her phone having personal conversations as well.
SiEdmo
Player Valuation: £10m
my mate used to keep a book of peoples indiscretions (people like you described, not just everyone) just in case he ever got pulled for anything, deffo worth making a note and then if anything happened you have it to rely on, I don't mean being a snitch, just backing yourself up
goodisonopheliac
Player Valuation: £30m
I'm going to make a list of stuff they've said to me and take it to the OH meeting. Some of it was pretty nasty.
Also worth recording who was there too, as if it does no harm to have corroboration.
Definitely worth recording the date, time, incident and who was there. Things quickly disappear when you throw multiple pieces of evidence at them!
Also the " innocent bystanders ", who`ve stood by and done nothing, tend to bottle it when they think they`re getting dragged into something and adopt the every man for him / herself attitude too
I had an issue with our fairly strict dress code and rules regarding appearances - something I strongly believe in and try to adhere to - which echoed this.Also the " innocent bystanders ", who`ve stood by and done nothing, tend to bottle it when they think they`re getting dragged into something and adopt the every man for him / herself attitude too
On one fairly hot day, I took my tie off while at a desk (no public) and was lambasted by a female senior to me in front of my peers, but nobody stood up against it.
Fair enough I thought. The day after, a colleague of mine (another male) was similarly chastised for their attire from the same female. We both 'took it on the chin'.
However, we noticed there was a pattern of her not taking note of females breaching regulations through numerous forms - all that we noted down and evidenced.
This included herself. Anyway, one day she publicly chastised the earlier colleague for something petty and again nobody mentioned a word to defend him.
Well, she was taken aback when we declared all the evidence (in front of her supporting colleagues) and claimed gross sexism - their allegiances soon changed.
I learnt there that sometimes you need some leverage as those 'innocent bystanders' soon enough began to speak up when it seemed they'd be tarred as well.
"Would you like the dress code regulations relaxed?" she had the impertinence to ask. No, just everyone treated the bloody same!