Been able to kick a four year painkiller addiction, but the toll on my mental health is telling. Dreading Christmas, but I feel powerful again.
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I've had a terrible year to mate.
Wife had an affair and finally after five years of lies I left our house car and my daughter behind.
I'm now in a one bedroom rented flat with a scumbag family near by and lots of debt but thankfully me and my daughter of 13 haven't argued for 2 weeks and that is an achievement.
Hang in there mate, it may feel like life itself is determined to break you but this is just a rough patch, it won't stay like this forever and in years to come you'll look back and be very proud of yourself that you managed to come through all this still healthy (you daughter will feel the same and when she's older I have no doubt she'll at some point turn to you and ask just how you managed to hold it all together). You will have things going way again at some point and when they do you'll appreciate the happiness all the more.
Please keep us formed if you can, you'll always have ears to lend here. The exact same goes for you @BigBlueNose
Had a largely pleasant few days since my last post, here's an update for anyone who's remotely interested.
Me and the young lady I've mentioned are continuing to talk and grow closer, real feelings are definitely developing on my end and I'm pretty sure they are on her end too.
We spent time in each other's company on Friday when we went out together with others for another work incentive. We arrived separately but the pair of us sat together on a long table at a restaurant and we had some good banter, from there we all went onto see a show that had been paid for for us where we sat together again and the laughs and mild flirting between us continued on. After that a friend of hers who was with us had problems which took her attention away from me so the night slowed down a bit. I just played the part of gentleman best I could and hung back to allow her to focus on her friend whilst offering to help if I could. In the end a few of us shared the train home and I bid her goodnight.
Not long after she called me before going to bed and was apologetic, saying she didn't mean to go all suddenly standoffish and she had been enjoying spending time with me. I told her not to worry and that she'd over-thought it, at not point was I upset because I felt she wasn't giving me her attention, that I understood that the said business with the friend had had to take priority but I enjoyed our night overall. The fact that she would feel the need to call me to explain something like that warmed my heart, she could have waited until the morning or not bothered at all and I'd thought no less of her but she did and we had a lovely chat before each going to bed.
This weekend we each did our own things but we've continued messaging and making each other laugh. We're both in work tomorrow but I hope to get to spend time together properly, just us this time, in the near future. Life feels quite good right now but I do realise it could all fall down at any moment so I'm trying to enjoy things best as I can and not be too anxious. Still taken no meds but I've got them in safe and accessible place in case I need them, nowhere near ready to completely discard them yet.
Hope anyone who's reading is coping well even if life feels very hard right now. I usually find the holidays a tough time to cope but so far this year has been a pleasant change (so far at least). Stay safe and healthy.
Me and the young lady I've mentioned are continuing to talk and grow closer, real feelings are definitely developing on my end and I'm pretty sure they are on her end too.
We spent time in each other's company on Friday when we went out together with others for another work incentive. We arrived separately but the pair of us sat together on a long table at a restaurant and we had some good banter, from there we all went onto see a show that had been paid for for us where we sat together again and the laughs and mild flirting between us continued on. After that a friend of hers who was with us had problems which took her attention away from me so the night slowed down a bit. I just played the part of gentleman best I could and hung back to allow her to focus on her friend whilst offering to help if I could. In the end a few of us shared the train home and I bid her goodnight.
Not long after she called me before going to bed and was apologetic, saying she didn't mean to go all suddenly standoffish and she had been enjoying spending time with me. I told her not to worry and that she'd over-thought it, at not point was I upset because I felt she wasn't giving me her attention, that I understood that the said business with the friend had had to take priority but I enjoyed our night overall. The fact that she would feel the need to call me to explain something like that warmed my heart, she could have waited until the morning or not bothered at all and I'd thought no less of her but she did and we had a lovely chat before each going to bed.
This weekend we each did our own things but we've continued messaging and making each other laugh. We're both in work tomorrow but I hope to get to spend time together properly, just us this time, in the near future. Life feels quite good right now but I do realise it could all fall down at any moment so I'm trying to enjoy things best as I can and not be too anxious. Still taken no meds but I've got them in safe and accessible place in case I need them, nowhere near ready to completely discard them yet.
Hope anyone who's reading is coping well even if life feels very hard right now. I usually find the holidays a tough time to cope but so far this year has been a pleasant change (so far at least). Stay safe and healthy.
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Thankyou mate. This forum really has been a great help for me for the past few months and I thankyou you all for listening to me moan giving me advice and even pointing me in the right direction at times so I haven't made things worse for both myself and my daughter
Life's not about being perfect but admitting mistakes and moving forward is something I'm slowly learning to come to terms with.
Excellent news about you and your daughter mate!!
Make sure you recognise that as the achievement it is and pat yourself on the back. Take the wins where you can find them; onwards and upwards.
Had a largely pleasant few days since my last post, here's an update for anyone who's remotely interested.
Me and the young lady I've mentioned are continuing to talk and grow closer, real feelings are definitely developing on my end and I'm pretty sure they are on her end too.
We spent time in each other's company on Friday when we went out together with others for another work incentive. We arrived separately but the pair of us sat together on a long table at a restaurant and we had some good banter, from there we all went onto see a show that had been paid for for us where we sat together again and the laughs and mild flirting between us continued on. After that a friend of hers who was with us had problems which took her attention away from me so the night slowed down a bit. I just played the part of gentleman best I could and hung back to allow her to focus on her friend whilst offering to help if I could. In the end a few of us shared the train home and I bid her goodnight.
Not long after she called me before going to bed and was apologetic, saying she didn't mean to go all suddenly standoffish and she had been enjoying spending time with me. I told her not to worry and that she'd over-thought it, at not point was I upset because I felt she wasn't giving me her attention, that I understood that the said business with the friend had had to take priority but I enjoyed our night overall. The fact that she would feel the need to call me to explain something like that warmed my heart, she could have waited until the morning or not bothered at all and I'd thought no less of her but she did and we had a lovely chat before each going to bed.
This weekend we each did our own things but we've continued messaging and making each other laugh. We're both in work tomorrow but I hope to get to spend time together properly, just us this time, in the near future. Life feels quite good right now but I do realise it could all fall down at any moment so I'm trying to enjoy things best as I can and not be too anxious. Still taken no meds but I've got them in safe and accessible place in case I need them, nowhere near ready to completely discard them yet.
Hope anyone who's reading is coping well even if life feels very hard right now. I usually find the holidays a tough time to cope but so far this year has been a pleasant change (so far at least). Stay safe and healthy.
Sounds promising!
Absolutely spot on in your approach, if you ask me - Don’t expect too much or put too much pressure on yourself and/or her to make things happen.
Fingers crossed for you, buddy!
coollino
Player Valuation: £80m
Off to the midwife today to possibly find out my partner has had her second miscarriage. Many of the same signs as the first, I'm trying to be more positive but she said she thinks she can tell.
First one was a missed miscarriage, she was being physically sick from the pain and there was nothing really I could do. Just feel a bit helpless.
First one was a missed miscarriage, she was being physically sick from the pain and there was nothing really I could do. Just feel a bit helpless.
efcforever
Player Valuation: £10m
My wife had 2 miscarriages before our 2 children were born. It's a horrible situation but you have to stay strong for your partner today. The way I dealt with it was to focus on my wife and look after her, by doing that I had less time to think about my own feelings.
Keep posting or PM me if you need to chat.
coollino
Player Valuation: £80m
Thanks. Hopefully we'll get the scan today. Had to push for it last time and we were right. Difficult as there are so many symptoms which can also been nothing.
She handled the first one really well. Hoping for some good news but she preparing for the worst (which isn't a bad thing in a way). We didn't tell anyone apart from her parents last time but have to decide to tell my family etc if it is the case with it being around Christmas.
efcforever
Player Valuation: £10m
We made the mistake of announcing the pregnancy early the first time. This meant that we had to have all the awkward conversations when casual acquantances would ask us how things were.
I wish you all the best. Please let us know how you get on today.
Bungle
Player Valuation: £90m
Wish you both all the best whatever the outcome today mate
SiEdmo
Player Valuation: £10m
fingers crossed mate, we had 2 before the lad was born, got to the point we didn't tell anyone the 3rd time round until well over 12 weeks, but 3rd time lucky it was, not that that makes it any easier, good luck however it turns out bud
FC sexy xxx
Player Valuation: £35m
You’ll sort it lad
evertondotcom
Player Valuation: £15m
I'm in a fortunate position that I've been offered another job on more money.
My current job that I love has offered me more money to stay, and I absolutely cannot make my mind up on what is best.
I'm terrified that the grass isn't always greener, and I could go somewhere new and absolutely hate the place - or after 6 months they give me the boot and I'm out on my backside after leaving a secure job.
I've been sitting on the decision for three weeks and need to make up my mind... today! My head is up my arse, haven't been able to sleep as I don't know what is the right decision.
My current job that I love has offered me more money to stay, and I absolutely cannot make my mind up on what is best.
I'm terrified that the grass isn't always greener, and I could go somewhere new and absolutely hate the place - or after 6 months they give me the boot and I'm out on my backside after leaving a secure job.
I've been sitting on the decision for three weeks and need to make up my mind... today! My head is up my arse, haven't been able to sleep as I don't know what is the right decision.