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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

SiEdmo said:
no drama mate, keep some sugary liquid to hand coz when I proposed to my Mrs it was in new York in November and was like -1 degrees and the cold and shock she collapsed haha, had to drag her into a pub for a coke hahaha, she had her head on the bar like she was out of it and the bartender goes is she ok dude and im like "yeah I proposed she is clearly made up"

enjoy mate, the butterflies just before are amazing, and don't confuse excitement with anxiety mate!!
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Haha certainly one to remember!

Its just around the corner now so I am really excited. I think I just had a wobble.
 
EFCPaul said:
Had the interview thing and I was unsuccessful but I not letting myself be downbeat about it. Got to just take the positives and keep faith in yourself, their loss is someone else's gain.

I don't think I showed the best of myself in all honesty but the woman I had to speak with I think just didn't like the look of me for some reason, I'm speculating like but I never once felt comfortable in her and her scribe's presence. It got off to a crap start straight away when she told me she was going to ask me questions on 3 specific things. I told her one of those things was not mentioned in the preparation pack I received, something else was. She rolled her eyes but that's not my fault. God knows if that went against me straight from the off.

Went very dry mouthed and my mind turned to mostly mush so I waffled a bit but the enviroment was intimidating, we sat in a room the size of an assembly hall with loads going on around us so settling down wasn't something I really managed to do.

Meh it happens, I really do believe if something is meant to be it will come with no problems. Thanks for the well wishes folks, I've felt better but also felt far worse. Onto the next one which will hopefully suit me better and give me a better feeling as I approach it. If I get bad feeling like that walking it's usually warning flag. Other job interviews I've succeeded in have felt like that. It just wasn't my type of vibe I guess.
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If you get a bad feeling it's usually a sign that it's not for you, I've gotten up in interviews and excused myself and said this job's not for me, I was actually kicked out of an interview once, I swear to god I was asked "if you do something wrong how would you react to being shouted at" I said that I wouldn't react very well as I feel there are easier and more effective ways of communicating than shouting at someone in the workplace, she said well that's what will happen here, I replied that, if that's the case then this company has major issues at management level, she then said "it would be best if you left now" I just looked at her and said "I assume you're a manager then, goodluck" and walked out. If you get a bad feeling only 2 things to do continue as normal and get some experience , or just get out and not waste your time.
 
I went for interview yesterday it was one of them group things. I didn't get to the next stage but I have took it as an opportunity to get some experience. I think they were looking for the most talkative people as it was a sales job. I am always quiet when I first meet people but once you start me its the getting me to shut up thats the trick. Once over I would have beat myself up about it as I should have picked up on what was required and been more chatty but this time I have been a bit more circumspect so hopefully it won't affect my confidence in the future. I also have a back up of an agency job which will hopefully come off soon.
 
LydiateLee said:
I've spoken about the good progress I've made in last 12 months, well last night I had a bad anxiety attack.

I am going to Prague on Sunday where I am planning on popping the question to my amazing girl. I think it's nerves and over-thinking that kicked it off. Things are perfect in my life and I am really not used to that being the case. Thinking of reasons it could all go wrong rather than accepting it for what it is.

Just shows there is no reasoning with mental health issues and it can rear it's head when least expected.

Trying to not get too down on myself today but finding it tougher than I'd like.
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When we step out of our comfort zone it produces anxiety mate, don't get too down about it. Short term pain for long term gain no doubt ;)
 

EFCPaul said:
Had the interview thing and I was unsuccessful but I not letting myself be downbeat about it. Got to just take the positives and keep faith in yourself, their loss is someone else's gain.

I don't think I showed the best of myself in all honesty but the woman I had to speak with I think just didn't like the look of me for some reason, I'm speculating like but I never once felt comfortable in her and her scribe's presence. It got off to a crap start straight away when she told me she was going to ask me questions on 3 specific things. I told her one of those things was not mentioned in the preparation pack I received, something else was. She rolled her eyes but that's not my fault. God knows if that went against me straight from the off.

Went very dry mouthed and my mind turned to mostly mush so I waffled a bit but the enviroment was intimidating, we sat in a room the size of an assembly hall with loads going on around us so settling down wasn't something I really managed to do.

Meh it happens, I really do believe if something is meant to be it will come with no problems. Thanks for the well wishes folks, I've felt better but also felt far worse. Onto the next one which will hopefully suit me better and give me a better feeling as I approach it. If I get bad feeling like that walking it's usually warning flag. Other job interviews I've succeeded in have felt like that. It just wasn't my type of vibe I guess.
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Ask for feedback as to why you were unsuccessful. Say it would help you in the future ( even if it wouldn't!)
 
Nymzee said:
Cracking down on our hours now at work, lots of people twiddling thumbs, not 100% what we’ve got going forwards. My company is decent though, very loyal, they’ll move people around to keep them going. Decided maybe it was best to update my CV though and plop it online just in case.

Problem is, this is the only “proper” job I’ve ever had and the thought of doing it somewhere else is driving my anxiety right up. What if you’re not up to it? What if they don’t need you after 6 months? What if the way you’ve been working isn’t translatable to other companies?

Has anyone got any tips for calming down about approaching a possible job change?
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Almost five years ago I took redundancy from a job I had done for 26 years. I had pretty much grown up with the people I worked with. Did some voluntary work, worked part time (i.e 10-12 hours a week term time ) as a note taker for a couple of disabled students at Durham University then I got another full time job three years ago. I was absolutely panicking on Day 1.I hadn't worked for two years, was in a new place, in a new location (Darlington not Durham) and had all those doubts- what if I can't do it, what if nobody likes me or I don't like them. Three years on, I still love the job, I'm actually quite good at it, my work colleagues have become good friends and I hope to retire doing this job! Don't overthink it or let the negatives bog you down.
 
EFCPaul said:
They said I didn't structure my answers the way they like candidates to do. Felt like a bit of a nothing explanation that, I honestly just don't think the lady liked the look of me. Not much can be done in that case.
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Or the recruitment exercise was a sham and they already knew who they wanted but had to pretend it was a fair and open competition. Happens a lot.
 
anjelikaferrett said:
Or the recruitment exercise was a sham and they already knew who they wanted but had to pretend it was a fair and open competition. Happens a lot.
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Meh I'll guess I'll never know, I don't want to wallow in victimhood becauese it won't get me anywhere. I just have to accept I wasn't what they wanted on the day, their loss will be somebody else's gain. I've been told by many people I'd be an asset to any business, I have to believe that myself and plough on. Thanks for the lovely words. :)
 

You don't, you are in a moment, I know so many that have thought that way and later regretted it. There is help, I know where that help is, depending where you are.
 

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