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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

barmcake said:
My lad started at his new school on Monday. He's not been to school for over 6 months and even before that his attendance wasn't good. At one point he'd not left the house for nearly 3 months. Despite that he's done a full week, done incredibly well and enjoyed it. It's gone far better than we could have imagined and I just hope this continues. Its been a strange week as its brought back some of the worries/memories of earlier this year whereby I'm worried during the day, has he gone to school, how was it, any issues etc. I'm not sure that will go away for a good while and part of me will always fear some form of regression.

Six months ago we were in a dark place and a hit a low of sleeping on a pull out bed in hospital with a suicidal 13 year old son. We were lost, had little support and no idea how we would wake from a nightmare that had pretty much gone on for two years. Support from friends was good but close family didn't understand. We withdrew as a family, stopped going out, attending family occasions etc. We couldn't really say why as it's not something you shout about. My wife was off work sick and it really felt like we were going nowhere. However, we stuck to it and we pushed CAMHS, the GP, the Psychiatrist until we got the help we needed. Today, he's improved dramatically, he's back in school and my wife is back in work full time. A few months back I was offered a promotion and my wife had the chance to go for one. We decided she wasn't in a good enough place to cope with that so we passed but I took mine as I felt I could manage and didn't want to pass on it. That's proved to be the right decision.

So I guess in summary, if you are in a bad spot right now and can't imagine a way out then don't give up hope. Seek help and support. It is out there. It can get better.

Once again, thanks for all the support.
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boss this lad......love all that

and good on you!, you and the wife deserve a lot of credit there!

hope everything continues that same trajectory going forward
 
EFCPaul said:
Had an eventful last few days.

Went to my first class for Level 2 counselling last night. It went well I felt, very diverse group of people and we all introduced ourselves and spoke with lots of passion as to why we were each doing the course. We had an introduction as to what counselling essentially is and what it will involve, the nuts and bolts basics really. We were then put into groups of 4 and did a little exercise, me and the three people I was with mixed a bit and got a nice vibe going. Really enthusiastic about next week.
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sounds really positive that mate....good stuff!
 
Today wasnt great. Had a bit of issue with a colleague, had made a small error but felt like the colleague was taking their frustration out on me in a very unproductive way, it had been bubbling for a while. We had a terse exchange and I was called into another room. The superior basically asked me to explain myself and I let it pour out a little bit. That I felt I was being chastised in a way that others wouldn't be because I'm still viewed as an outsider. That I didnt think it was fair and how I get zero encouragement and only criticism. How I refused to be viewed as some walkover. It wasnt nice, I got emotional and my eyes were wet.

She was very sweet but basically said she didnt really agree with most of the points. Me and the colleague spoke after too, cleared the air and made up (she said she was sorry and so did I). Felt very ashamed though for getting so worked up.

Need my tea.
 
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Just found out my ex is seeing someone already. He's been to the house, spending time with my little girl. Her mate (a girl) she went out with on Friday was actually that fella.

Lovely
 
MrD said:
Just found out my ex is seeing someone already. He's been to the house, spending time with my little girl. Her mate (a girl) she went out with on Friday was actually that fella.

Lovely
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Sometimes it’s good to have the bandage ripped off quicker and with clarity too. You won’t now mash your own brain trying to work out if she’s seeing anyone, you won’t have to worry about when it might happen etc and hopefully it’ll stop you sending her any messages about getting back together.

Take it as drawing a line in the sand and do your best to move on. Just please whatever you do don’t let your emotions get the best of you and send her any snotty, passive aggressive messages as it won’t make you feel better.
 

Nymzee said:
Sometimes it’s good to have the bandage ripped off quicker and with clarity too. You won’t now mash your own brain trying to work out if she’s seeing anyone, you won’t have to worry about when it might happen etc and hopefully it’ll stop you sending her any messages about getting back together.

Take it as drawing a line in the sand and do your best to move on. Just please whatever you do don’t let your emotions get the best of you and send her any snotty, passive aggressive messages as it won’t make you feel better.
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Thanks mate. well, i'm surprised how well I've taken it. I thought i'd be destroyed but the way she's been over the past two months has been so hateful, I've seen another side to her. I'm sad of course, just not as bothered as i thought. I probably will be when i meet him though.

I did send her some messages about it. Mostly about how sad i found it that she is with someone so soon but mostly my messages were about the welfare of our little girl. Told her i'm happy for her....i'm not but i have to keep things civil. I won't be messaging her again about anything other than the baby. She has got zero respect for me. So that's the end of that chapter as far as i'm concerned. It's a hard pill to swallow but yes, the plaster has been well and truly ripped off.
 
MrD said:
Just found out my ex is seeing someone already. He's been to the house, spending time with my little girl. Her mate (a girl) she went out with on Friday was actually that fella.

Lovely
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Mate that’s what my ex told me while she was still with me ( that she was going on nights out with her mate) when she was spending my dough taking his family on nights out and for meals . Seem through it quick enough thankfully but it’s hard to deal with .
 
An exciting new study published this week has found that deep brain stimulation (DBS) of a specific area in the brain provides a robust antidepressant effect that is sustained over a long period of time in patients with treatment-resistant depression—the most severely depressed patients who have not responded to other treatments.

Deep brain stimulation, currently approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration to treat essential tremor, Parkinson’s disease, epilepsy, and obsessive-compulsive disorder, is a neurosurgical procedure involving the placement of a neurostimulator (sometimes referred to as a “brain pacemaker”), which sends high-frequency electrical impulses through implanted electrodes deep in the brain to specific brain areas responsible for the symptoms of each disorder.
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www.goodnewsnetwork.org

Long-Term Study Shows Deep Brain Stimulation is Effective Treatment for Most Severe Form of Depression

Over the course of the study's eight-year follow-ups, the treatment was shown to be an “effective and robust” therapy for treatment-resistant depression.
www.goodnewsnetwork.org www.goodnewsnetwork.org
 
stumps1878 said:
Mate that’s what my ex told me while she was still with me ( that she was going on nights out with her mate) when she was spending my dough taking his family on nights out and for meals . Seem through it quick enough thankfully but it’s hard to deal with .
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Funny thing was. It was my little girl who grassed her. She's at the age now where she can talk great and has no issue saying anything. It's ridiculous in my opinion to be back on the game so quick. And it won't be just the past few days this has gone on for, she must have been back on it right away. She has hurt me but made it easier for me. That tall, shiny pedestal i had her on is now very dull and very low.

I asked her if she was sexting and meeting up with people while we were together. Her reply was, "we're not together anymore, i don't have to answer to you" Haha.....that answers the question really.
 
MrD said:
Funny thing was. It was my little girl who grassed her. She's at the age now where she can talk great and has no issue saying anything. It's ridiculous in my opinion to be back on the game so quick. And it won't be just the past few days this has gone on for, she must have been back on it right away. She has hurt me but made it easier for me. That tall, shiny pedestal i had her on is now very dull and very low.

I asked her if she was sexting and meeting up with people while we were together. Her reply was, "we're not together anymore, i don't have to answer to you" Haha.....that answers the question really.
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It sounds like she was cruel to you to try in some warped way to justify her own actions to try and ease her own conscience. Good riddance mate.
 

If you know someone who is suffering from mental health problems, please check on them either by phone or in person. Show them that you care, let them know that they matter and they are not alone.


Mental Health/Suicide Prevention Helplines and Websites​

Samaritans: 116 123 (www.samaritans.org) - 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Get in touch about anything that’s troubling you, no matter how large or small the issue feels. Will listen and help you work through what’s on your mind. No judgement, no pressure.

Mind: 0300 123 3393 or text 86463 (www.mind.org.uk) - Provide confidential help, advice, and information on mental health issues for the price of a local call.

Childline: 0800 1111 (www.childline.org.uk) - Childline is free, confidential, and available any time day or night. Help and advice available for young people about a wide range of issues (self-harming, sex, bullying, etc.) Talk to a counsellor online, send Childline an email, or post on the message boards.

Papyrus: 0800 068 41 41 (www.papyrus-uk.org) - If you are a young person, or know a young person, who is not coping with life and may be contemplating suicide, please call for confidential support and suicide prevention advice.
Available: Mon-Fri 9:00 am to 10:00 pm Weekends 2:00 pm to 10:00 pm Bank Holidays 2:00 pm to 10:00 pm

Calm: 0800 58 58 58 (www.thecalmzone.net) – Available 5 pm to Midnight the helpline is for people in the UK who are down or have hit a wall for any reason, and need to talk or find information and support.

Young Minds: 0808 802 5544 (Need urgent help? text YM to 85258)(www.youngminds.org.uk) - Whether you want to know more about how you’re feeling, get information about a mental health condition, or find out what support is available to you.

The Mix: 0808 808 4994 (www.themix.org.uk) - Free information and support for under 25s in the UK. Get help and advice on a range of issues: mental health, drugs, homelessness, sex, relationships, money, jobs, etc.
 
Remember when Mental Health was a stigma? No such thing or you just need to cheer up? :D Love how it's much more understood and accepted now. It's a very real thing.
Think i'll make today the start of my daily Mentaly Healthy day.
 

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