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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

gorgeousgeorgeEFC said:
Not a great deal. I tend to sit about ruminating a lot of the time.
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Retirement is different for everybody, I took early retirement 5 years ago , initially did a bit of consultancy , have enjoyed every year with this year being my most content . Starting something completly new is not for everyone and I found that extending my then current interests worked very well . I'd always done a type of voluntary work , I extended that into helping to train new members, always been a runner now changed clubs and heavily into helping at parkrun and other activities.

One thing I've promoted a number if times on GOT is Walking Football. Our group of about 16 are all retired, varying degrees of fitness , men and women and we have a sociable chat over tea and biscuit afterwards. I'm sure there'll be a session going on somewhere close to you , it's worth searching for , whatever your current level of fitness is you'll be made welcome.

I don't think there's a magic bullet , as I said everybody's different and retired people don't suddenly wake up one day and suddenly start a new hobby out of the blue, but there are many opportunities out there from just spending a few hours volunteering at a local charity to extending current activities like walking into something more sociable with a local group.
Good luck mate, I'm sure you'll find some things to get you a bit more motivated and the negative thoughts from your head , sounds like you've already started making progress.
 
Sunderland afc said:
Nope. Will continue. Normally every 18 months or so.

Handling it better than I thought but maybe it still doesn't feel quite real yet.
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Obviously everybody is different but two years ago I was offered redundancy from my job in Durham where I had worked for over 20 years. I'm over 50 and decided to take it even though I thought the chances of getting a new one at my age were fairly slim. Unlike you, I didn't particularly like the job I had which was why I took the deal. I had two years off, did some voluntary work, had a 10 hour a week part time job at Durham University for 6 months and did not regret it one bit. I was looking for jobs the whole time I wasn't working. Just before the money ran out, six months ago, I got a full time permanent job earning £5k a year more than I had been in my old job. I love my new job. It was scary going somewhere else but it has worked out well for me. Some of my friends who also took redundancy at the same time have done a series of temporary jobs via agencies and enjoy doing that too. As I said, we are all different, but I thought I would share my positive experience with you.
 
anjelikaferrett said:
Obviously everybody is different but two years ago I was offered redundancy from my job in Durham where I had worked for over 20 years. I'm over 50 and decided to take it even though I thought the chances of getting a new one at my age were fairly slim. Unlike you, I didn't particularly like the job I had which was why I took the deal. I had two years off, did some voluntary work, had a 10 hour a week part time job at Durham University for 6 months and did not regret it one bit. I was looking for jobs the whole time I wasn't working. Just before the money ran out, six months ago, I got a full time permanent job earning £5k a year more than I had been in my old job. I love my new job. It was scary going somewhere else but it has worked out well for me. Some of my friends who also took redundancy at the same time have done a series of temporary jobs via agencies and enjoy doing that too. As I said, we are all different, but I thought I would share my positive experience with you.
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That's a good story. Have mates who who have done similar things. Guess I'm not a risk taker. Might be different if the mortgage was paid off and the kids were older. It might get taken out of my hands and if I don't get a job at my current level then who knows.

Just hope when and if the time come I cope well. The thought of going back to the dark place as I was four years ago scares the hell out of me.
 

Ashtonian said:
bit of a random post like so sorry in advance.

I have been having bad dreams recently. But not scary ones, just bad ones, ones where i am stressed or worried or something. Seem to happen on a nightly basis now, where instead of not remembering anything i am waking up with this stressful or worrying feelings from the dream. I can dismiss it and get on with the morning but yeah, it is a bit odd as normally i don't have dreams like that let alone repeatedly.

Looking into it, says a reason could be anxiety, but i don't feel like i have that, although have a few things over the coming weeks including a wedding/stag do (which right now i have no guests bar family) and the scotland trip. So yeah, slightly concerned right now, especially if i have anxiety and don't even realise it.
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thanks for letting me know i'am not alone in this. I also had a spell last week where I had vivid dreams every night, they were so real that I couldn't distinguish them from reality and remembered them for hours after waking. all were related to my situation.
 

Sunderland afc said:
That's a good story. Have mates who who have done similar things. Guess I'm not a risk taker. Might be different if the mortgage was paid off and the kids were older. It might get taken out of my hands and if I don't get a job at my current level then who knows.

Just hope when and if the time come I cope well. The thought of going back to the dark place as I was four years ago scares the hell out of me.
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If you are risk averse, take the job earning less money and look for a new job asap. Who knows, you may find a new job before the end of the consultancy period, in which case you could get £20k redundancy money and a new job. I certainly wouldn't advocate taking the money with no job to go to if you can avoid it, but it doesn't sound like that is something you want to do anyway.

If you are getting negative thoughts, feel free to vent on here mate.
 

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