Pilks
Player Valuation: £6m
What an absolute scandal, kopites made to wait for almost an hour and a half in total safety and scorching 20C weather.
'A pop-up shop has now opened'... lol
The pop-up shop unfortunately had to close almost immediately as it was attacked with bottles and flares, while 'impatient' Liverpool fans leapt onto the roof and jumped up and down...
Police in Naples studied the extensive video footage and concluded there was 'no evidence' and that it was 'impossible' to identify anyone
A spokesman for the Liverpool fans, Mr Jurgen Paving-Slab, from Cornwall, remarked: 'It was carnage. One of our lads had to take off his '5 Times' woolly jumper that his mother had knitted him, and Fanta bottles had all been snapped up in seconds. It was almost five minutes between periods of cloud cover at one time. They call this justice?'
Meanwhile a Napoli fan was observed dropping a Mars Bar wrapper outside the ground, and was immediately wrestled to the floor by police and led away in handcuffs. UEFA will be hearing the case tomorrow afternoon, and their representative, Mr Rafael Paisley-Dispensation, announced that it was 'time to make an example out of these people'.
The victimisation continues...