Farting

[Kurt.]

It's not great getting rogered 2 hours in the theater either

Jesus …. What were you watching ?

 

[Blue 1]

Taught my son the old "Mongolian Mist", and now he throws farts at his uncle every time he sees him lol

 

[anton66]

This thread is going to linger on isn’t it?

 

[Dddddd]

Early days of seeing the mrs we went round to her mates for a few beers

They had a big Rotty called “Shankly” after…..yeah you guessed it

Anyway after being there a while I decided to test the water with an SBD and wow it absolutely reeked, “ I’m in trouble here” I thought to myself as it was only going to be a matter of seconds until it reached all four corners of the living room, permeating everyone’s nostrils and resulting in us being asked to leave immediately

“Bl00dy he11 shankly that is disgusting” shouted her embarrassed friend, and “what have you been feeding him?” To her husband

Seizing my opportunity I proceeded to spend the rest of the evening gleefully dropping bombs and watching the kopite dog get more and more blame

The next day the mrs woke to a text message saying “I’m so sorry about the dog last night, we’ll have to switch his food to a more expensive one”

I’ve never confessed to this story before - utft

 

[Yarrgh]

Jesus …. What were you watching ?

Another Kenwright Production...

 

[Yarrgh]

Early days of seeing the mrs we went round to her mates for a few beers

They had a big Rotty called “Shankly” after…..yeah you guessed it

Anyway after being there a while I decided to test the water with an SBD and wow it absolutely reeked, “ I’m in trouble here” I thought to myself as it was only going to be a matter of seconds until it reached all four corners of the living room, permeating everyone’s nostrils and resulting in us being asked to leave immediately

“Bl00dy he11 shankly that is disgusting” shouted her embarrassed friend, and “what have you been feeding him?” To her husband

Seizing my opportunity I proceeded to spend the rest of the evening gleefully dropping bombs and watching the kopite dog get more and more blame

The next day the mrs woke to a text message saying “I’m so sorry about the dog last night, we’ll have to switch his food to a more expensive one”

I’ve never confessed to this story before - utft

Never thought I'd feel sorry for Shankly.

 

[Joey66]

Seeing the word Moviprep gives me chills even now, years on. Jesus what an experience that stuff is. Onset within about 5 minutes then a good 7 hours on the porcelain with a whole orchestra of noises. Crawling into bed after physically and mentally ruined feeling half the man you were before.

Moviprep - dynamite - on the toilet all day - farting water in the end - I read a book sat on the toilet- plus went to the hospital in a nappy pad provided - bum like a japanease flag .....lethal stuff ....
Then a camera up to see if your hat was on straight - I had one up & down made sure they used different cameras though .....

 

[lancs blue]

Early days of seeing the mrs we went round to her mates for a few beers

They had a big Rotty called “Shankly” after…..yeah you guessed it

Anyway after being there a while I decided to test the water with an SBD and wow it absolutely reeked, “ I’m in trouble here” I thought to myself as it was only going to be a matter of seconds until it reached all four corners of the living room, permeating everyone’s nostrils and resulting in us being asked to leave immediately

“Bl00dy he11 shankly that is disgusting” shouted her embarrassed friend, and “what have you been feeding him?” To her husband

Seizing my opportunity I proceeded to spend the rest of the evening gleefully dropping bombs and watching the kopite dog get more and more blame

The next day the mrs woke to a text message saying “I’m so sorry about the dog last night, we’ll have to switch his food to a more expensive one”

I’ve never confessed to this story before - utft

Was he put down shortly afterwards due to fart gate

 

[Joey66]

Jesus …. What were you watching ?

You can watch if you want - TV cameras everywhere for him to guide his gear around your intestines or stomach - i looked the other way TBH ..... My mate watched when he had his Polyps of the bowel removed him being an engineer he was fascinated on how they removed it .....

 

[Thomasc]

You can watch if you want - TV cameras everywhere for him to guide his gear around your intestines or stomach - i looked the other way TBH ..... My mate watched when he had his Polyps of the bowel removed him being an engineer he was fascinated on how they removed it .....

I watched mine. Got a letter through last week saying it was benign thankfully

Amazing watching them remove the polyp though. They cut it off and catch it in a little net before hauling it out if your rusty bullet hole, like pulling in a shoal of sprats.

 

[Joey66]

I watched mine. Got a letter through last week saying it was benign thankfully

Amazing watching them remove the polyp though. They cut it off and catch it in a little net before hauling it out if your rusty bullet hole, like pulling in a shoal of sprats.

Great news for you that

 

[Pootsy]

I'm a 48 year old man who still finds farting far too funny. I'm actually crying here reading some of these stories.

Its not just the sound though, its the reactions of the innocent bystanders.

 

[ETID]

I'm a 48 year old man who still finds farting far too funny. I'm actually crying here reading some of these stories.

Its not just the sound though, its the reactions of the innocent bystanders.

Snap, this is definitely one of the funniest threads on here

 

[Kris75]

Jesus …. What were you watching ?

Crying

 

[PKwalnuts]

Was in fazakerly hospital toilets, the ones in the main tower entrance, on the right. A fella in the other cubicle was letting out the most rip roaring ones - between evacuations. Poor bloke sounded in agony, kept growling 'oh Jesus Christ!' And moaning after each one.

Was hilarious and haunting in equal measure.

I know him