Install the app
How to install the app on iOS

Follow along with the video below to see how to install our site as a web app on your home screen.

Note: This feature may not be available in some browsers.

Hell

Status
Not open for further replies.
DavidH said:
When we moved into this house she said let's do an Ikea run. I laughed in her stupid face and told her to take her mum and her own bank card and went down the pub to talk footy, music, birds and politics with the lads all afternoon.





Who am I kidding. We went for some new bowls, we left with a trolley full of stuff we didn't need including a few items I didn't even know existed all paid for on my card with about 4 arguments thrown in for good measure including me nearly lashing the handbrake on on the M62 on the WAY to Warrington.

Swedish scum.
Click to expand...

Yes but the meatballs for lunch, eh?
 
DanB90 said:
Post in thread 'Summer transfer window 2023'
https://www.grandoldteam.com/forum/threads/summer-transfer-window-2023.117374/post-10659263

It’s an evening in July, I’ve been stuck on a bus in Croatia for the last 6 hours. The transfer window is open, so furiously refresh GOT transfer thread all day to keep my sanity.

Not a sniff of a rumour and our only signing so far is 38 year old Ashley Young.

Jamie Webster plays on a loop.
Click to expand...

I found a post where he says he is bald
 

You sit down to a fancy meal, and are about to start eating, and out of nowhere a mariachi band appears and starts "serenading" your table, and you are forced to be polite and look up and smile from time to time, also knowing that you might even have to tip them once they finish their song for fear of not looking cheap...and this is in your own kitchen.
 
Trying to return upstream in a boat you've spent 3 days painting in squall conditions. A hire boat with 2 happy but inexperienced boaters are operating a lock as I approach. The left hand gate is open. "I'm going in on the left" He announces and in he goes. (I'd have gone in through the left gate and then over to the right of the lock so the other boat could just slip in) I'm holding water hoping his gormless partner nips over and opens the right hand gate so I can get in ... as boaters do. She doesn't. Just stands there by the open gate. So I moor up and open the gate myself before going in, by which time their boat is drifting diagonally across the lock ready to hit mine.

I grimace. We get through it with me explaining what to do. Their boat hits mine again and they're off. At exactly a speed between my tickover and a higher speed where the cam on my control won't sit, wobbling all over the place.

I eventually overtake and end up at the next lock after a very narrow stretch with fast moving water and a strong weir stream KNOWING that when they catch up, if I don't get into the lock and away, they'll crash into me on the bend.

I share the lock with a fella who's there before me ... an experienced boater. Relief. I turn around and who's caught up ... "will three fit in there?" they cheerily shout. Will three shoes fit in a shoebox? And what's that coming out of the lock straight towards my glossy new paint on this bend by a strong weie stream? Another hire boat.

So in a word .... hire boats. Actually that's two words, but who cares. I've just walked 2 miles across a baking wheat field and a busy A road to get to a pub until I don't care anymore.
 
Last edited:
chrismpw said:
Trying to return upstream in a boat you've spent 3 days painting in squall conditions. A hire boat with 2 happy but inexperienced boaters are operating a lock as I approach. The left hand gate is open. "I'm going in on the left" He announces and in he goes. (I'd have gone in through the left gate and then over to the right of the lock so the other boat could just slip in) I'm holding water hoping his gormless partner nips over and opens the right hand gate so I can get in ... as boaters do. She doesn't. Just stands there by the open gate. So I moor up and open the gate myself before going in, by which time their boat is drifting diagonally across the lock ready to hit mine.

I grimace. We get through it with me explaining what to do. Their boat hits mine again and they're off. At exactly a speed between my tickover and a higher speed where the cam on my control won't sit, wobbling all over the place.

I eventually overtake and end up at the next lock after a very narrow stretch with fast moving water and a strong weir stream KNOWING that when they catch up, if I don't get into the lock and away, they'll crash into me on the bend.

I share the lock with a fella who's there before me ... an experienced boater. Relief. I turn around and who's caught up ... "will three fit in there?" they cheerily shout. Will three shoes fit in a shoebox? And what's that coming out of the lock straight towards my glossy new paint on this bend by a strong weie stream? Another hire boat.

So in a word .... hire boats. Actually that's two words, but who cares. I've just walked 2 miles across a baking wheat field and a busy A road to get to a pub until I don't care anymore.
Click to expand...
Hope they only had warm Fosters on tap.
 
chrismpw said:
Trying to return upstream in a boat you've spent 3 days painting in squall conditions. A hire boat with 2 happy but inexperienced boaters are operating a lock as I approach. The left hand gate is open. "I'm going in on the left" He announces and in he goes. (I'd have gone in through the left gate and then over to the right of the lock so the other boat could just slip in) I'm holding water hoping his gormless partner nips over and opens the right hand gate so I can get in ... as boaters do. She doesn't. Just stands there by the open gate. So I moor up and open the gate myself before going in, by which time their boat is drifting diagonally across the lock ready to hit mine.

I grimace. We get through it with me explaining what to do. Their boat hits mine again and they're off. At exactly a speed between my tickover and a higher speed where the cam on my control won't sit, wobbling all over the place.

I eventually overtake and end up at the next lock after a very narrow stretch with fast moving water and a strong weir stream KNOWING that when they catch up, if I don't get into the lock and away, they'll crash into me on the bend.

I share the lock with a fella who's there before me ... an experienced boater. Relief. I turn around and who's caught up ... "will three fit in there?" they cheerily shout. Will three shoes fit in a shoebox? And what's that coming out of the lock straight towards my glossy new paint on this bend by a strong weie stream? Another hire boat.

So in a word .... hire boats. Actually that's two words, but who cares. I've just walked 2 miles across a baking wheat field and a busy A road to get to a pub until I don't care anymore.
Click to expand...

Aah my favourite episode of Rosie & Jim.
 

chrismpw said:
Trying to return upstream in a boat you've spent 3 days painting in squall conditions. A hire boat with 2 happy but inexperienced boaters are operating a lock as I approach. The left hand gate is open. "I'm going in on the left" He announces and in he goes. (I'd have gone in through the left gate and then over to the right of the lock so the other boat could just slip in) I'm holding water hoping his gormless partner nips over and opens the right hand gate so I can get in ... as boaters do. She doesn't. Just stands there by the open gate. So I moor up and open the gate myself before going in, by which time their boat is drifting diagonally across the lock ready to hit mine.

I grimace. We get through it with me explaining what to do. Their boat hits mine again and they're off. At exactly a speed between my tickover and a higher speed where the cam on my control won't sit, wobbling all over the place.

I eventually overtake and end up at the next lock after a very narrow stretch with fast moving water and a strong weir stream KNOWING that when they catch up, if I don't get into the lock and away, they'll crash into me on the bend.

I share the lock with a fella who's there before me ... an experienced boater. Relief. I turn around and who's caught up ... "will three fit in there?" they cheerily shout. Will three shoes fit in a shoebox? And what's that coming out of the lock straight towards my glossy new paint on this bend by a strong weie stream? Another hire boat.

So in a word .... hire boats. Actually that's two words, but who cares. I've just walked 2 miles across a baking wheat field and a busy A road to get to a pub until I don't care anymore.
Click to expand...
Boating doesn't sound particularly rewarding mate. Have you considered another hobby?
 
Daveysgingerlovechild said:
£20 for a burger?????
Click to expand...
£20 for a burger.

Not falling for it. Gastropubs can get in the bin too. Found a delightful run down tired looking ordinary village pub the other day. They did lasagna, chips and salad for 11 quid. Good chips too and lasagna every bit as good as a gastropub ... none if this skinny cardboard or burned tasting triple cooked nonsense served on an effing plank, just honest to goodness chips and plenty of them. We're loosing pubs like this to gentrification.
 

Status
Not open for further replies.

Welcome

Join Grand Old Team to get involved in the Everton discussion. Signing up is quick, easy, and completely free.

Register
Back
Top