2021/22 Michael Keane

[Zatara]

Absolutely guarantee he wets himself when a bird looks at him and has to use the safeties to lift 10kg on the smith machine.

Imagine the state of Keane if you blindfolded him and left him in Trafalgar Square.

I think the half time subbing felt like the curtain being drawn on his career. Reminded me of Unsworth v Arsenal.

Agreed...it did until a bit of doubt when Lampard covered for him after the game.

Now hes just said hes fit for sunday

All these bitter old lizards hating on Keane and critiquing his character and mental fortitude when they themselves settled down with the first unfortunate girl who would accept them and their disgusting personality and body shape.

I avoid the sanctions.

 

[Zatara]

Amazing how every manager plays him.

Not playing branthwaite if he really was ill...suicide.

 

[Daveysgingerlovechild]

He's been a mainstay of our defence for what feels like eternity. Stop and think about the number of partners He's had. I think Mina and Zouma (and there were comedy moments aplenty) are the only two he has played well with or formed an okay partnership with.

Got his limitations, but defences are units. Said it in the matchday thread, there's a reason Ancelotti sat us so deep. To suit the players we had at the back.

 

[Encoder]

He can fight pretty much all of you fat scruffs, neck a much higher class of girl and bench more than your 1RM as a set of ten. For warm up.

All of those things may be correct. My bench is woeful but I bet I could deadlift more *slaps fat ass*

 

[Baines' left foot]

I defended him recently but he's truly terrible.

He isn't even confident enough to be a central defender.

 

[blueconverse]

If he starts Sunday we have to score 2 as he will cost us at least 1 goal.

 

[gonetomorrow]

According to Frank he wasn't well on Monday but played regardless.

 

[BigDuncTributeBand]

He's been a mainstay of our defence for what feels like eternity. Stop and think about the number of partners He's had. I think Mina and Zouma (and there were comedy moments aplenty) are the only two he has played well with or formed an okay partnership with.

Got his limitations, but defences are units. Said it in the matchday thread, there's a reason Ancelotti sat us so deep. To suit the players we had at the back.

Agree with a lot of that but not that the defence was the sole reason ancelotti sat them so deep. Keep’s being parroted like if it wasn’t for Keane and Mina we’d be playing on the halfway line and on the front foot. Would be suicidal with the midfield we have. We’d get absolutely smashed.

The whole team defends as a unit and our midfield is dysfunctional, so one paced and offers no protection. Ancelotti had to try to make us compact because both the defence and midfield aren’t up to it.

A good set up midfield unit and protection for the back four will make average defenders look good and their job easy. A terrible midfield unit and even a good back four will struggle. We’ve got a bad midfield unit making our bad defenders worse and thei jobs 100 times more difficult.

 

[Daveysgingerlovechild]

Agree with a lot of that but not that the defence was the sole reason ancelotti sat them so deep. Keep’s being parroted like if it wasn’t for Keane and Mina we’d be playing on the halfway line and on the front foot. Would be suicidal with the midfield we have. We’d get absolutely smashed.

The whole team defends as a unit and our midfield is dysfunctional, so one paced and offers no protection. Ancelotti had to try to make us compact because both the defence and midfield aren’t up to it.

A good set up midfield unit and protection for the back four will make average defenders look good and their job easy. A terrible midfield unit and even a good back four will struggle. We’ve got a bad midfield unit making our bad defenders worse and thei jobs 100 times more difficult.

Yeah, can't disagree there - that point about the unit again, innit. Jagielka and Distin were fast, but the Martinez set up left them exposed so many times. We arguably had the better midfield then, but it's what they were asked to do.

 

[ProZ]

If we cant handle Michael at his worst we don't deserve him at his best

 

[lancs blue]

As long as he stays in bed on Sunday it'll be one less problem

 

[GoldenToffee]

As long as he stays in bed on Sunday it'll be one less problem

I hope his mrs stays with him then because I heard he's scared of the dark.

 

[Canuck Darryl]

Truth is, he only screws up 2 or 3 times a match. All the squad do the same. more or less. His biggest problem is that his mistakes end up in the back of our net.

 

[DOMNOLAN]

He really is terrible isn’t he. How long are we stuck with him for?

 

[Dublin blue 75]

Now hes just said hes fit for sunday

He did not say that, did he? Dear god no.