Hahahahaha.
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Most you've ever disappointed your partner
- Thread starter chicoazul
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l4toffee
Player Valuation: £40m
[Poor language removed] hell hahahahaha
Woolly Blue
Player Valuation: £80m
Not the current Ms Woolly, but the previous. Not really a disappointment either, more of a oh ffs moment, apart from that it fits the thread nicely.
Her sister came on holiday with us one year, I woke up one morning, the missus wasn't in our bed so I got up to stretch my legs a bit and didn't bother putting my specs on.
On the balcony was a naked woman admiring the view who, through my blurred vision looked familiar. Crept up on her, gave her tits a squeeze and straight away realised I'd made a massive mistake. Queue an awkward moment as the missus came out to see what all the fuss was about
Her sister came on holiday with us one year, I woke up one morning, the missus wasn't in our bed so I got up to stretch my legs a bit and didn't bother putting my specs on.
On the balcony was a naked woman admiring the view who, through my blurred vision looked familiar. Crept up on her, gave her tits a squeeze and straight away realised I'd made a massive mistake. Queue an awkward moment as the missus came out to see what all the fuss was about
TheOldLady
Player Valuation: £5m
Bought a new 3 piece, had it about 2 weeks, went out with the lads and vaguely remember drinking tequila, woke up with a banging head and my bird screaming at me, I'd done a massive sh1t all over the couch
Donald Twain
Vide cor meum
Blimey !
Donald Twain
Vide cor meum
lol The old 'didn't put my specs on' chestnut! Works every time.
silent bob
What a guy.
Did something similar a few years back. Walked into pub to meet bird, saw her standing at the bar so stood behind her and reached round to give the fun bags a jolly squeeze hello. A complete stranger with ths same dress and hairstyle spun round to remonstrate. Had a hell of a time explaining that away to the poor woman, her VERY angry husband and my bird who walked in halfway through the grovelling apology.
Whistlin' Dixie
Player Valuation: £50m
Heard one about some lad what got out of jail....
His bird came to see him just before he was being released, to tell him she was going away with her parents to alicante (OR somewhere abroad) for a week. She asked him if he would look after her parents' house while they were away & said she'd leave the keys under the flowerpot.
Anyways, the day he gets out, he goes out on the pish. His bird phones his mobile tells him she's having a whale of a time etc, asks what time he's going to her folks' house so he says he's on the lash but he reckons about 9 o'clock..
So, after a while he goes to get the keys, gets it and goes back out on the lash. Cops for some bird around 8:45....Takes her back to his bird's mam & dad's but goes round the back (Uses key for the kitchen door).
He's got this bird astride him, and he decides to get her into the living room, so he switches on the lights.....And there's his bird, her folks and his mates...While he's balls deep in this other bird...They didn't tell him they were having a surprise party for his release
His bird came to see him just before he was being released, to tell him she was going away with her parents to alicante (OR somewhere abroad) for a week. She asked him if he would look after her parents' house while they were away & said she'd leave the keys under the flowerpot.
Anyways, the day he gets out, he goes out on the pish. His bird phones his mobile tells him she's having a whale of a time etc, asks what time he's going to her folks' house so he says he's on the lash but he reckons about 9 o'clock..
So, after a while he goes to get the keys, gets it and goes back out on the lash. Cops for some bird around 8:45....Takes her back to his bird's mam & dad's but goes round the back (Uses key for the kitchen door).
He's got this bird astride him, and he decides to get her into the living room, so he switches on the lights.....And there's his bird, her folks and his mates...While he's balls deep in this other bird...They didn't tell him they were having a surprise party for his release
Woolly Blue
Player Valuation: £80m
These things happen mate. Personally I don't trust anyone who says they've never squeezed the wrong pair by mistake.
Donald Twain
Vide cor meum
This was you wasn't it?Heard one about some lad what got out of jail....
His bird came to see him just before he was being released, to tell him she was going away with her parents to alicante (OR somewhere abroad) for a week. She asked him if he would look after her parents' house while they were away & said she'd leave the keys under the flowerpot.
Anyways, the day he gets out, he goes out on the pish. His bird phones his mobile tells him she's having a whale of a time etc, asks what time he's going to her folks' house so he says he's on the lash but he reckons about 9 o'clock..
So, after a while he goes to get the keys, gets it and goes back out on the lash. Cops for some bird around 8:45....Takes her back to his bird's mam & dad's but goes round the back (Uses key for the kitchen door).
He's got this bird astride him, and he decides to get her into the living room, so he switches on the lights.....And there's his bird, her folks and his mates...While he's balls deep in this other bird...They didn't tell him they were having a surprise party for his release
Whistlin' Dixie
Player Valuation: £50m
D
Deleted member 28206
Guest
Came home with two girls after a night out, forgot I had a girlfriend at home tbh.
Whistlin' Dixie
Player Valuation: £50m
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