- Status
Just to confirm i do not think tofeenut is Alan Myers.
But i do think @Reveeler is Alan Myers. Chancer.
Good player him.
Yes
nismoneil
Player Valuation: £100k
Yes. He's got some very good connections. Very rarely tweets stuff without some substance.
coleman=quality
Player Valuation: £15m
Eze was on a different level at QPR always wanted us to get him from them. He’s a really good player no chance he comes here
dutchblue54
Player Valuation: £20m
Fits right in LOL
Bluelladevil
Player Valuation: £750k
It's 11.01pm on Friday 1st September 2023 in a darkened room at Everton Towers (Liver Building) - Kevin Thelwell sits back in his chair, a smug smile crosses his face as he congratulates himself on the fact that he has negotiated his way through the murky waters of another transfer window without spending any money. "The fans won't be happy but who cares about them" he scoffs to himself.
The sound of a commotion in the corridor reaches him. He hears Jim, the octogenarian security guard who accepts being paid less than the minimum wage, shakily pleading "You can't go in there! He said he mustn't be disturbed!" Thelwell's heart lurches and skips a beat as he hears the menacing sandpapered vocal chords of SD "Disturbed! Disturbed! I'm going to leave that fu***r very disturbed for the rest of his miserable fu****g life!"
"Aargh!", he hears the sound of a thud as Jim is thrown to the floor. The door flies open and there stands SD, his face contorted with rage. In an instant that beetroot face is within inches of Thelwell's "A LEFT BACK!! A FU****G LEFT BACK!! I TOLD YOU WE NEEDED A F*****G LEFT BACK!! " Thelwell feels globules of spit spattering his face. For a brief moment the thought crosses his mind that SD is going to sink his teeth into Thelwell's over large nose.
But then - "Oh God, I knew there was something I'd forgotten" he thinks.
He backs away stuttering "I, erm.. I, err.. well it, err, it wasn't easy .... You see, err.. I had a few irons in the fire and all that and err..." He sees his chance. He darts round the table, through the door and hurdles Jim who is still lying on the floor taking a selfie which he is going to use in his injury claim against the club. SD tries to run after him but his knees have been ruined by years of kicking "cheeky bas***d upstart" centre forwards in the lower leagues who tried to make a fool of him. SD stands there in the doorframe, his head hung low, hands on hips. Jim can hear him muttering "We're fu***d, we're absolutely fu***d".
Thelwell has reached the stairs, scurrying down them with startling agility. He's never been so frightened in all of his life; he realises there's a seeping, creeping warmth between his legs. Out through the doors, he smells the fresh clean air off the Mersey and breathes it in deeply (such a relief from that appalling reek emanating from between his legs) "I'll go missing again. I've done it loads of times and no one's said anything before" he tells himself as he awkwardly staggers to his £150,000 Mercedes S Class. "Shame about the seats being ruined" he thinks " I'll just charge the replacement costs to the club."
So ends another calamitous Moshiri-led day in the life of Everton FC.
The sound of a commotion in the corridor reaches him. He hears Jim, the octogenarian security guard who accepts being paid less than the minimum wage, shakily pleading "You can't go in there! He said he mustn't be disturbed!" Thelwell's heart lurches and skips a beat as he hears the menacing sandpapered vocal chords of SD "Disturbed! Disturbed! I'm going to leave that fu***r very disturbed for the rest of his miserable fu****g life!"
"Aargh!", he hears the sound of a thud as Jim is thrown to the floor. The door flies open and there stands SD, his face contorted with rage. In an instant that beetroot face is within inches of Thelwell's "A LEFT BACK!! A FU****G LEFT BACK!! I TOLD YOU WE NEEDED A F*****G LEFT BACK!! " Thelwell feels globules of spit spattering his face. For a brief moment the thought crosses his mind that SD is going to sink his teeth into Thelwell's over large nose.
But then - "Oh God, I knew there was something I'd forgotten" he thinks.
He backs away stuttering "I, erm.. I, err.. well it, err, it wasn't easy .... You see, err.. I had a few irons in the fire and all that and err..." He sees his chance. He darts round the table, through the door and hurdles Jim who is still lying on the floor taking a selfie which he is going to use in his injury claim against the club. SD tries to run after him but his knees have been ruined by years of kicking "cheeky bas***d upstart" centre forwards in the lower leagues who tried to make a fool of him. SD stands there in the doorframe, his head hung low, hands on hips. Jim can hear him muttering "We're fu***d, we're absolutely fu***d".
Thelwell has reached the stairs, scurrying down them with startling agility. He's never been so frightened in all of his life; he realises there's a seeping, creeping warmth between his legs. Out through the doors, he smells the fresh clean air off the Mersey and breathes it in deeply (such a relief from that appalling reek emanating from between his legs) "I'll go missing again. I've done it loads of times and no one's said anything before" he tells himself as he awkwardly staggers to his £150,000 Mercedes S Class. "Shame about the seats being ruined" he thinks " I'll just charge the replacement costs to the club."
So ends another calamitous Moshiri-led day in the life of Everton FC.
Dwight K Schrute
Player Valuation: £25m
Dwight K Schrute
Player Valuation: £25m
Italian media, so pinch of salt and all that but this sounds so Everton:
Everton remain the most interested club when it comes to Salernitana striker Boulaye Dia, despite his release clause expiring yesterday.
That’s according to Corriere dello Sport, who say the Toffees have been ‘confirmed as the most interested club’ in the player and could use Neal Maupay as something of an ace up their sleeve to get him.
They explain that Dia’s release clause, which was worth €25m, expired last night, meaning for the time being he can’t be taken from the Italian club.
He remains in Campania for the time being, but Salernitana haven’t completely ruled out a sale in the coming weeks of the transfer window.
Everton are at the front of the queue for the player and the belief is that their interest is so strong negotiations could start in the coming days.
Everton remain the most interested club when it comes to Salernitana striker Boulaye Dia, despite his release clause expiring yesterday.
That’s according to Corriere dello Sport, who say the Toffees have been ‘confirmed as the most interested club’ in the player and could use Neal Maupay as something of an ace up their sleeve to get him.
They explain that Dia’s release clause, which was worth €25m, expired last night, meaning for the time being he can’t be taken from the Italian club.
He remains in Campania for the time being, but Salernitana haven’t completely ruled out a sale in the coming weeks of the transfer window.
Everton are at the front of the queue for the player and the belief is that their interest is so strong negotiations could start in the coming days.
Anyway us commoners can get access to these kind of accounts?
Morning mates.
Welcome to the 21st July Everton transfer
show…..
I’ve tried to bundle together as many of the transfer rumours flying around, combining them into one bite size and heart burn inducing portion for your dining pleasure.
I make some apology for some of the sources and articles used.
According to The Daily Mail, Anthony Elanga has rejected the chance to sign for the Toffees.
“Although keen to explore a move away from Old Trafford, he won’t be joining Sean Dyche’s side,” The Mail reports.
“Everton held direct talks with Elanga but the player has ruled out a move amid concerns over his suitability to Dyche’s tactics.”
Everton are considering a Championship loan for Dele Alli, putting West Brom and Birmingham City on red alert.
French striker Neal Maupay has been linked to Serie A side Salernitana. The 26-year-old disappointed this season, mustering just two goals across 31 appearances. Despite that, Salernitana football director Morgan De Sanctis is interested in Maupay, according to Sportwitness via Gazzetta dello Sport. They lost out on signing Maupay last summer, and are still interested in bringing in the Frenchman. At the same time, Everton has been tracking one of Salernitana’s attackers, Boulaye Dia.
During the January transfer window of the 22/23 season, Arnaut Danjuma was set to join Everton before the deal was hijacked by Tottenham Hotspur. However, according to Fabrizio Romano, history is not quite set to repeat itself. The Italian Journalist has given the “here we go” for the Dutchman to join the Merseyside club on loan until June of 2024.
One player who has been tipped for a move to the south coast is Everton's Mason Holgate, a versatile defender who has found himself falling out of favour in recent seasons at Goodison Park.
It was reported by Mail Sport last week that Saints were holding discussions with the Toffees titan, who is also attracting interest from newly-promoted Sheffield United.
Abdoulaye Doucoure has admitted he was ‘very close’ to leaving Everton. Speaking to The Athletic, the midfielder has opened up on his struggles under Frank Lampard and how he was ready to leave the club if the former boss wasn’t sacked last season.
Wolverhampton Wanderers are reportedly among a host of Premier League clubs preparing an approach for FC Midtjylland midfielder Emiliano Martinez. Footy Insider reports Wolves and West Ham United hold a strong interest in the former Red Bull Bragantino man, whereas Tribal Football claims Luton Town and Everton are also in the mix.
With rumors swirling regarding the future of Everton and Jamaican winger Demarai Gray, the 27-year-old gave strong words of focus and commitment to helping the club in its upcoming Premier League season in an interview with the Football Daily.
Sean Dyche’s Everton could now reportedly miss out on Newcastle United winger Allan Saint-Maximin. Earlier this month, 90min reported that Everton are among the clubs who are interested in signing Allan Saint-Maximin from Premier League rivals Newcastle United in the summer transfer window.
However, it now seems that Everton will not be able to sign bring Saint-Maximin, described as “really dangerous” by Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola in The Mirror in August 2022, to Goodison Park this summer.
Villarreal have managed to offload Arnaut Danjuma for another season. The Yellow Submarine signed Danjuma in a big-money deal ahead of the season before last, with the Dutchman going on to have a significant say in the club’s Champions League efforts that year.
But since then, Danjuma has felt he is good enough to play on a bigger stage, only to be proven wrong. Last season, the winger joined Tottenham on loan and spent the whole season on the bench, and after hoping for more interest this summer, he will now join an Everton side who dodged Premier League relegation on the final day of last season.
It looks as though Everton are about to suffer a transfer blow as long-term target El Bilal Toure is reportedly set to sign for Serie A outfit Atalanta.
The Almeria striker seems to have been one of the Toffees’ primary targets this summer, with the La Liga side’s CEO Mohamed El Assy confirming to Diario de Almeria on 4 July that an offer had been made for the 21-year-old.
Villarreal forward Arnaut Danjuma looks set to seal his Everton move in the coming days with a medical booked for Saturday (22 July), according to Sky Sports News.
Sky Sports News reported on 20 July (16:10pm), that the Spanish club are set to receive a loan fee of around £3.5m from Everton with his medical booked in the next 48 hours.
Welcome to the 21st July Everton transfer
show…..I’ve tried to bundle together as many of the transfer rumours flying around, combining them into one bite size and heart burn inducing portion for your dining pleasure.
I make some apology for some of the sources and articles used.
According to The Daily Mail, Anthony Elanga has rejected the chance to sign for the Toffees.
“Although keen to explore a move away from Old Trafford, he won’t be joining Sean Dyche’s side,” The Mail reports.
“Everton held direct talks with Elanga but the player has ruled out a move amid concerns over his suitability to Dyche’s tactics.”
Everton are considering a Championship loan for Dele Alli, putting West Brom and Birmingham City on red alert.
French striker Neal Maupay has been linked to Serie A side Salernitana. The 26-year-old disappointed this season, mustering just two goals across 31 appearances. Despite that, Salernitana football director Morgan De Sanctis is interested in Maupay, according to Sportwitness via Gazzetta dello Sport. They lost out on signing Maupay last summer, and are still interested in bringing in the Frenchman. At the same time, Everton has been tracking one of Salernitana’s attackers, Boulaye Dia.
During the January transfer window of the 22/23 season, Arnaut Danjuma was set to join Everton before the deal was hijacked by Tottenham Hotspur. However, according to Fabrizio Romano, history is not quite set to repeat itself. The Italian Journalist has given the “here we go” for the Dutchman to join the Merseyside club on loan until June of 2024.
One player who has been tipped for a move to the south coast is Everton's Mason Holgate, a versatile defender who has found himself falling out of favour in recent seasons at Goodison Park.
It was reported by Mail Sport last week that Saints were holding discussions with the Toffees titan, who is also attracting interest from newly-promoted Sheffield United.
Abdoulaye Doucoure has admitted he was ‘very close’ to leaving Everton. Speaking to The Athletic, the midfielder has opened up on his struggles under Frank Lampard and how he was ready to leave the club if the former boss wasn’t sacked last season.
Wolverhampton Wanderers are reportedly among a host of Premier League clubs preparing an approach for FC Midtjylland midfielder Emiliano Martinez. Footy Insider reports Wolves and West Ham United hold a strong interest in the former Red Bull Bragantino man, whereas Tribal Football claims Luton Town and Everton are also in the mix.
With rumors swirling regarding the future of Everton and Jamaican winger Demarai Gray, the 27-year-old gave strong words of focus and commitment to helping the club in its upcoming Premier League season in an interview with the Football Daily.
Sean Dyche’s Everton could now reportedly miss out on Newcastle United winger Allan Saint-Maximin. Earlier this month, 90min reported that Everton are among the clubs who are interested in signing Allan Saint-Maximin from Premier League rivals Newcastle United in the summer transfer window.
However, it now seems that Everton will not be able to sign bring Saint-Maximin, described as “really dangerous” by Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola in The Mirror in August 2022, to Goodison Park this summer.
Villarreal have managed to offload Arnaut Danjuma for another season. The Yellow Submarine signed Danjuma in a big-money deal ahead of the season before last, with the Dutchman going on to have a significant say in the club’s Champions League efforts that year.
But since then, Danjuma has felt he is good enough to play on a bigger stage, only to be proven wrong. Last season, the winger joined Tottenham on loan and spent the whole season on the bench, and after hoping for more interest this summer, he will now join an Everton side who dodged Premier League relegation on the final day of last season.
It looks as though Everton are about to suffer a transfer blow as long-term target El Bilal Toure is reportedly set to sign for Serie A outfit Atalanta.
The Almeria striker seems to have been one of the Toffees’ primary targets this summer, with the La Liga side’s CEO Mohamed El Assy confirming to Diario de Almeria on 4 July that an offer had been made for the 21-year-old.
Villarreal forward Arnaut Danjuma looks set to seal his Everton move in the coming days with a medical booked for Saturday (22 July), according to Sky Sports News.
Sky Sports News reported on 20 July (16:10pm), that the Spanish club are set to receive a loan fee of around £3.5m from Everton with his medical booked in the next 48 hours.
kenada_blue
Welcome to Barcelonaton FC
Wants that Saudi dollar
He has the same connections as literally all the other journos. Just not as canny with how he releases the info.
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