The drunk thread

[chicoazul]

So it's now Xmas Day, just got him from a mad one out on town, totally ruined here....
Corona's all afternoon, onto the whiskey later in the night, staggered into town and seen the girl I've loved but never gone there for the past 6 years and went for it down a back alley, can't believe it's happened, only drunk could I do this!
Merry Xmas all you tits out there! When I wake up I'm gonna regret it I think,.........

IS RIGHT LAD.

 

[Woolly Blue]

So it's now Xmas Day, just got him from a mad one out on town, totally ruined here....
Corona's all afternoon, onto the whiskey later in the night, staggered into town and seen the girl I've loved but never gone there for the past 6 years and went for it down a back alley, can't believe it's happened, only drunk could I do this!
Merry Xmas all you tits out there! When I wake up I'm gonna regret it I think,.........

Ahhhh, down the back alley. How I love that phrase !
Well done mate. Hope there's no repercussions in the gonads area later on !

 

[EFCNIK]

Ahhhh, down the back alley. How I love that phrase !
Well done mate. Hope there's no repercussions in the gonads area later on !

The odd genital wart or two would serve as an excellent reminder of his conquest.

 

[Woolly Blue]

The odd genital wart or two would serve as an excellent reminder of his conquest.

Badge of honour, everyone should have one.

A had a wart on my right thumb years ago. I was scared sh*tless that it'd transfer to my todger via masturbation.

 

[chicoazul]

He's going to be desperate with hangover and guilt eating his very being right now.

Warts within a week.

 

[EFCNIK]

I bet you jizzed right in there didn't you Elong you filthy bear. I'd be more worried about the fetus currently growing inside of her tbh.

 

[chicoazul]

Congratulations on having to give 40% of your monthly wage away for the next eighteen years mate.

 

[EFCNIK]

Congrats mate. Next Christmas will be the baby's first and you'll be elbows deep in nappys and being nagged by a woman you will grow not to love. Merry Christmas!

 

[chicoazul]

If you pick this message up quickly enough then I have three simple words for you to act upon with haste:

Morning. After. Pill.

 

[DualityNSNO]

Congrats mate. Next Christmas will be the baby's first and you'll be elbows deep in nappys and being nagged by a woman you will grow not to love. Merry Christmas!

Birthday? Implying it is born instantly and it doesn't take 9 months to develop, sure, why not.

FFS are you drunk already?!

And congrats on the conquest, Elong.

 

[EFCNIK]

Or if you don't, coathanger.

 

[EFCNIK]

Birthday? Implying it is born instantly and it doesn't take 9 months to develop, sure, why not.

FFS are you drunk already?!

And congrats on the conquest, Elong.

First Christmas you numpty.

 

[bluejock]

Or if you don't, coathanger.

Knitting needle. Bottle of vodka. Flight of stairs.

 

[DualityNSNO]

First Christmas you numpty.

Didn't think of that. Oh well, I just got up as I was at a party, again (third consecutive in 3 days), and got home at about 7, so I have no clue what I'm on about, really.

 

[bluejock]

I'm on the Magners. And I have a bottle of vodka. Dare I fulfil the dream?