I'll take the blue & white one.
Yet another January transfer window passes where Everton let go more than they bring in.
I thought some of the seasons in the nineties gave me my lowest vibe with Everton, but I am properly running on empty now.
If I felt this low about things with my wife, I'd see a marriage counsellor. How do you translate that to your relationship with your football club.
I'm a realist, i don't expect us to buy without selling - I get it, we're brassic - but I thought we'd find SOMEONE to get on loan.
Steven Ireland, Jamie O'Hara, Robbie Keane, Daniel Sturridge, Roque Santa Cruz - all inter-Prem loans, not necessarily the players we'd all want but players who had Prem experience, could "do a job" and who'd compete for places.
I await the inevitable further bad news now, whether that be going out of the cup, injuries, transfer requests, resignations or administration, or several of those, or all of them.
But like a mug, in April, the form will drop through the door and I'll sign on again for another season of broken promises, frustration and torture. Because like it or not at times, Everton are my drug and all it takes to suck me back in is a last minute winner or a run in the cup or even just a belter of a goal.