Anyone having a worse day than me?

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chrismpw said:
A thread for those of us wishing to offload (in my case, literally).

In sure some of you are, for whatever serious reason - but this is my day today:

Tomorrow morning I'm having a routine procedure - an examination - because of family history. Since Saturday I've nit been allowed ANY of my favourite foods. All I've been allowed to eat is beige.

Today at 10 am I ate the last food I'm permitted for 24 hours. At 6pm I have to start drinking a litre of cold wallpaper paste. I will be shitting regularly - the leaflet promises 12-15 toilet visits.

At 5am, amidst broken-toilet-visit-sleep, no doubt, I have to down another litre of slush before more explosive visits to the bog.

At 9am tomorrow I get a camera shoved up my arse and get inflated like a very unhappy balloon. I'm hoping the camera crew is tiny and that there us no need for a sound crew.

In the midst of all this , in case it wasnt bad enough, there's a Derby game.

Cheer me up, for pity's sake.
Click to expand...

You could be @ForeverBlue92

That’s all I’ve got.
 
chrismpw said:
A thread for those of us wishing to offload (in my case, literally).

In sure some of you are, for whatever serious reason - but this is my day today:

Tomorrow morning I'm having a routine procedure - an examination - because of family history. Since Saturday I've nit been allowed ANY of my favourite foods. All I've been allowed to eat is beige.

Today at 10 am I ate the last food I'm permitted for 24 hours. At 6pm I have to start drinking a litre of cold wallpaper paste. I will be shitting regularly - the leaflet promises 12-15 toilet visits.

At 5am, amidst broken-toilet-visit-sleep, no doubt, I have to down another litre of slush before more explosive visits to the bog.

At 9am tomorrow I get a camera shoved up my arse and get inflated like a very unhappy balloon. I'm hoping the camera crew is tiny and that there us no need for a sound crew.

In the midst of all this , in case it wasnt bad enough, there's a Derby game.

Cheer me up, for pity's sake.
Click to expand...
Ever heard of Dumplestilskin mate?

 

COYBL25 said:
You could be @ForeverBlue92

That’s all I’ve got.
Click to expand...

FB92 is currently enjoying a day off in the sun. Photography business running smoothly, decent revenue coming in via social media.

I suspect my arousal levels are much higher than the majority of this platforms user's considering the current level of bedwetting on display.

Although I do not wish to brag about that, I would happily trade in my decent standard of living, business & 4 bedroom detached premise for less trolls and grifters interrupting my good vibes.
 
ForeverBlue92 said:
FB92 is currently enjoying a day off in the sun. Photography business running smoothly, decent revenue coming in via social media.

I suspect my arousal levels are much higher than the majority of this platforms user's considering the current level of bedwetting on display.

Although I do not wish to brag about that, I would happily trade in my decent standard of living, business & 4 bedroom detached premise for less trolls and grifters interrupting my good vibes.
Click to expand...
Reeks of a well known Harry Enfield sketch this.
 
chrismpw said:
A thread for those of us wishing to offload (in my case, literally).

In sure some of you are, for whatever serious reason - but this is my day today:

Tomorrow morning I'm having a routine procedure - an examination - because of family history. Since Saturday I've nit been allowed ANY of my favourite foods. All I've been allowed to eat is beige.

Today at 10 am I ate the last food I'm permitted for 24 hours. At 6pm I have to start drinking a litre of cold wallpaper paste. I will be shitting regularly - the leaflet promises 12-15 toilet visits.

At 5am, amidst broken-toilet-visit-sleep, no doubt, I have to down another litre of slush before more explosive visits to the bog.

At 9am tomorrow I get a camera shoved up my arse and get inflated like a very unhappy balloon. I'm hoping the camera crew is tiny and that there us no need for a sound crew.

In the midst of all this , in case it wasnt bad enough, there's a Derby game.

Cheer me up, for pity's sake.
Click to expand...
If you feel some 'pushing' down there and the doctor still has two hands on your shoulders, question their methods sternly.

Good Luck though!
 

Buckers said:
Mate I’ve had that procedure, you are underestimating the impact of that filth they are making you drink. It’s remarkable, drinking it is a form of torture but by god it’s effective. It will be like niagra coming out of your ass. If it didn’t taste so bad I’d do it once a month for colonic irrigation.
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You tasted what came out your ass?
 

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