At what point does it become acceptable....

[ArtetaMoney]

Just go the toilet or in a different room and do it there.

 

[Daveysgingerlovechild]

Your relationship will never last if you can't talk openly and honestly about your deepest fears, desires and dreams. Equally resolving tensions in your relationship via open dialogue is a must for success.

This issue spans all of the above my friend. You need to talk to her.

 

[LydiateLee]

Your relationship will never last if you can't talk openly and honestly about your deepest fears, desires and dreams. Equally resolving tensions in your relationship via open dialogue is a must for success.

This issue spans all of the above my friend. You need to talk to her.

Thanks for the advice.

How do I open the conversation? I'm thinking just letting one rip and saying "What you reckon of that then?"

 

[Daveysgingerlovechild]

Thanks for the advice.

How do I open the conversation? I'm thinking just letting one rip and saying "What you reckon of that then?"

As plans go, that's infallible.

 

[FC sexy xxx]

Go the bog and after a dump scrape your arse along the carpet like dogs do when they’ve got an itchy crack . Post the results back .

 

[Yarrgh]

Why are you so windy?

 

[larrygobfiend]

Fart in her fit little mouth when she's sleeping, mate. That seemed to work for me before before she left me...

 

[Philw]

Mate I've tried but it's just too risky.

Do or do not, there is no try.

Or just practice, get that sphincter working properly!

 

[blue61]

Try going for the accidental fart, make it a small one like, immediately apologising. Test her reaction, if she's really peeved you need to fart in your own company forever more, is she worth it? However, she may just laugh and join in with a big ripper, ice broken. Dip your toe lid.

Edit. Don't forget to say "better out than in".

 

[chrismpw]

.....to fart in front of your new girlfriend?

It's becoming a concern I'll be honest. I do enjoy a fart and holding them is really painful.

Not long ago, I woke up creased with wind. It was genuinely uncomfortable so I made an excuse to go out to my car saying that I'd left my wallet in there. Once I got in I erupted, if I'd have done that in the house she'd have heard it 100%.

Anyway, it's been just under 3 months. Shall I just unleash and hope for the best, or maintain my gentlemanly approach?

Disclaimer - She's fit and I am aware I am punching considerably above my weight so need to get this right!

Get a dog.

Blame dog.

Works for me.

 

[LydiateLee]

Why are you so windy?

High protein diet, genetics?? God knows!

 

[LydiateLee]

I knew I could count on my Evertonian brothers for sound advice on this topic.

Well in lads.

 

[.....!]

Just ask her if she is into smelling the accelerant used to force faecal matter from your colon.

 

[.....!]

P.S. Better an empty house than a bad tenant.

 

[Toast]

Cup one and throw it in her face.

They love that.