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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

One of my friends lost her battle with depression last week, leaving behind 2 children. She re-married only 4 months ago, split up last weekend and it seems that was the final straw. We are closer to her first husband, and see their children a lot who always talked very positively about their mum. We knew she was on a downward curve as her daughter was constantly posting positive messages on facebook for her, which happens every 6 months or so, but being newlyweds never thought it would spiral down so far so quickly.

The children were staying with dad for the week and she sent them a text saying she had to go away for a while and would see them soon. And that is the last thing she ever said.
 
WA Toffee said:
One of my friends lost her battle with depression last week, leaving behind 2 children. She re-married only 4 months ago, split up last weekend and it seems that was the final straw. We are closer to her first husband, and see their children a lot who always talked very positively about their mum. We knew she was on a downward curve as her daughter was constantly posting positive messages on facebook for her, which happens every 6 months or so, but being newlyweds never thought it would spiral down so far so quickly.

The children were staying with dad for the week and she sent them a text saying she had to go away for a while and would see them soon. And that is the last thing she ever said.
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Sorry mate. A real shame.

Did she access any support?
 
I just wanted to share my story that I posted in the addiction/depression thread. Reading this kind of stuff really helps and if my story can help other people overcome what they are going through and give them strength, its well worth it.
For a time I was depressed, but have thankfully since mostly got through it. Naturally I'm a hugely cynical person and spent my time focussing on all the negatives in a situation(dead set Everton Fan right there ;) ). So when everything wasn't going all fine and dandy all I could see was my life going totally and utterly wrong at every level. It wasn't even big things that kept me feeling that way it was just little things going wrong that I was super aware of and made me feel terrible about life and myself. Eventually I got out of this slump by coming to the realisation that I was focussing too much on the negatives, and not enjoying the positives for what they were. So now I always spend time making sure that I look at, find and enjoy the positives in what I'm doing, which has actually made me a better person and means that I am far happier. Its not easy to get out of depression, I personally didn't even recognise that I was depressed until probably half a year of it. It took me deciding that I needed to change and constantly work on my whole mindset of and about life to pull me out of that slump and I'm definately stronger for it. If anyone wants to talk pm. me and I'm happy to help and listen.
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I still occasionally slump back into dark stages, and its an ongoing thing where I try to work on keeping that positive mindset and keep my enjoyment of the many wonders of life. Being open with people you trust is so important, it wasn't until someone I trusted and really respected was upfront with me and said, you seem unhappy and not like yourself. So to those reading this thread looking for help and answers, be it for you or for someone you know, talk to someone about it.
 
WA Toffee said:
One of my friends lost her battle with depression last week, leaving behind 2 children. She re-married only 4 months ago, split up last weekend and it seems that was the final straw. We are closer to her first husband, and see their children a lot who always talked very positively about their mum. We knew she was on a downward curve as her daughter was constantly posting positive messages on facebook for her, which happens every 6 months or so, but being newlyweds never thought it would spiral down so far so quickly.

The children were staying with dad for the week and she sent them a text saying she had to go away for a while and would see them soon. And that is the last thing she ever said.
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That's heartbreaking.

I've lived on my street since a kid, some 30yrs and in that time I've seen two dads take themselves out of this world, both in horrific circumstances.

I've watched the wifes's and children distraught at what has happened and through pure ignorance and lack of understanding (also only being young at the time myself) I was disgusted with the actions of the person, thinking them very selfish and thoughtless of others.

I understand more now these days and finally it's being accepted as an illness, these people need help. And others around them need to know the signs, what to do, and the where to get the help...

Anything that can be done to raise awearness is fantastic and a credit to GOT and it's members for this thread.

More important than any football match!!
 

Groucho said:
Sorry mate. A real shame.

Did she access any support?
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Not as far as I am aware. We didn't see her too much since her divorce, but see her kids quite often, and my kids absolutely adore them. They are a great couple of kids and will have no limit of support to get them through it, - mum's family, great step-mum and lots of friends.

With hindsight the warning signs were there - daughter trying to prop her up, putting on weight, days off work, frequent visits to the doctor (which turned out to be stockpiling of pills). I would really encourage anyone who sees any these signs in their loved ones to act in some way or ask for help while they still can.
 
I hadn't noticed this thread before. My long term partner is having a lot of problems at present. She has suffered from fibromyalgia for just over 7 years now and after working hard all her life to achieve a successful career she has been pretty much bed bound for the last few years with constant pain and fatigue. We set up a local support group to try and help other sufferers in our local area, also she works for a national charity. For a time this seemed to give her a direction and helped focus. Since before Christmas her mental health has been a real issue, to the point she just cries all day and is very negative and talks of having had enough regularly. I have had doctors and the adult services involved but seem to have now been left to manage her situation and looking after our 2 year old with no help. The doctor told me adult services have said they can't help as she's not a risk to our child. My point I guess is can be hard sometimes getting help even if you ask for it.
 
RalphDring said:
I hadn't noticed this thread before. My long term partner is having a lot of problems at present. She has suffered from fibromyalgia for just over 7 years now and after working hard all her life to achieve a successful career she has been pretty much bed bound for the last few years with constant pain and fatigue. We set up a local support group to try and help other sufferers in our local area, also she works for a national charity. For a time this seemed to give her a direction and helped focus. Since before Christmas her mental health has been a real issue, to the point she just cries all day and is very negative and talks of having had enough regularly. I have had doctors and the adult services involved but seem to have now been left to manage her situation and looking after our 2 year old with no help. The doctor told me adult services have said they can't help as she's not a risk to our child. My point I guess is can be hard sometimes getting help even if you ask for it.
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NHS needs to do more to look after people with mental health problems IMHO. There are so many people suffering and struggling to get help. Got a distant mate with bipolar and he was pulling his hair out at the lack of support from the NHS.
 

haven't read through the thread yet but love that this is a stickied thread on here. Depression is a big deal and doesn't seem to get the attention it warrants.
 
RalphDring said:
I hadn't noticed this thread before. My long term partner is having a lot of problems at present.
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My wife has been diagnosed as bipolar over 12 years ago, I know it can be difficult for the people living with those that suffer from this disease. She was hospitalized twice when symptoms started and has tried several counselors and medications to find the combination that works best. I know she still has moments in the fall when motivation and clarity/focus are lacking. It's hard to see the effect depression has on our loved ones, I can't image the view from her eyes.
 
The NHS is good but make sure they don't restrict your sessions, if you need it. A lot of organisations that they refer you to will only offer an initial 6 sessions. I'm currently being seen for an Anxiety/NPD disorder and it does help but you need a good support network around you, which has been my problem in the past.
 
I'd just like to mention, the Samaritans are a great outlet if anyone needs to talk. The emphasis is on listening, as many people who suffer from depression feel unable to turn to those whom they love most. It's incredible how often that at the end of a phonecall, the Samaritan could have said next to nothing, and that person goes away with a weight lifted off their shoulders, and all thoughts of taking their own life dissipated.
 

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