Same here, please post asap even if it's just to let us know you're ok ?
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Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues
- Thread starter Groucho
- Start date
Same here, please post asap even if it's just to let us know you're ok ?
Always talk mate. Better to talk to someone than not atall. Pm me or anybody if needed.
Did anyone contact you?
The Esk
Player Valuation: £70m
How's things mate? O K now?
Tim's tourettes
Player Valuation: £10m
I sent him a message via his inbox about 15 mins after he posted this but didn't get anything back. Hopefully he's ok, I did see he was posting in other threads on normal Everton stuff just prior to this so hopefully he's ok
He's been on the site this morning so perhaps the chap just needs bit of privacy.
Let's respect that, leave it, and offer our help if he needs it again.
admirschleck
Player Valuation: £8m
I spoke about my brother few pages ago and got some great repsonses, would like to thank everyone once again. However, as a short update (cause it's not really that big of a deal), he came back home from University, had one little problem in house once again when he just "exploded", but he once again seems calm after all that. It really looks like he just has an attack, becomes the evilest person everyone ever met and then just calms down 10 minutes after and becomes the nicest angel you've ever seen. It's really, really difficult. Luckily, he decided to go back to Uni once again, so he'll be leaving soon. Just hoping for the best.
All the time, however, while I was trying to act like a proper brother and help him, I didn't notice the problem I have. It is not anxiety, it is not depression (it is kind of, at the end, but not the main cause), some would say it might not even be a problem at all, but I really started noticing it last few days and I can't find the better place to talk about it. As someone who was always the most informed one about the sports, who always watched every game as a kid, who always knew every latest transfer even in Faroe Islands League 3 to say so, I simply had to try betting (few years ago). It all started well, I won some money - lost some, but I was in plus, which was, I am not going to lie, pretty solid for a young pal. I then started earning dozens and quickly even hundreds of euros, but as I was not able to make an online account due to age restriction, I would always go to betting shops and use my pocket-money or money parents gave me for lunch as stake. It was all cool since it was 4-5 euros and really didn't affect me or my family at all. Then, a friend I met online borrowed me couple bucks on a bitcoin online betting site for fun and that was when I believe the real problem started. I quickly gone from having few euros on my account to having few hundreds and in the end, thousands euros on it. I was very proud, everyone around me were supporting me (obviously talking about friends, girls my age here, not parents or older people). I withdrew money, bought some cool stuff for myself, left some money and stopped betting for few months. Happy days.
Going 3 months in future, all the money was spent and I just needed more. I don't want to sound cocky, but I was always lucky to have more pocket-money than people my age, but that just didn't seem enough at that point, even though it was even more than I used to get before. I got into a strange world of high numbers and amounts that I simply couldn't get out. I then made account, deposited 20e and then lost it same night. That kept repeating 6-7 times and it gave me some serious headaches. Obviously I won some in the meantime, but even though wins were bigger than losses sometimes, I just kept getting depressed from all the money I lost. I was feeling down, I couldn't sleep until 5am thinking something like "Why did I put bet on that shitty Brazilian league 3 team? Why?". It was all because when leagues that I really knew everything about finished (read as European leagues) I needed something else, something to do in late night hours because all I did was betting (I am talking about a month ago period). I even started Betting Thread here, just to see I am not the only one. I just got seriously addicted to it. Now, I am not writing this because I got out of it, I just lost another (rather) big sum of money tonight and I am completely lost in this. I just don't know what to do. If I just collected all the money I spent on betting last 2 months, I would probably have more than an average Serbian wage, which is really a lot considering I am not making any money by myself. Even thought I am still in quite a big plus looking at it overally, I seriously want to get out of this. I don't want to feel [Poor language removed], to be depressed, to have headaches because of some random athletes who don't even care about me and my money. Now, to be clear, I am not even an adult yet, it's just too much for me to handle. Haven't spoken to my parents about this yet, they don't even know about it (I always lied how I am going to use money to buy stuff online just to deposit it on a betting site and it worked so far, somehow) and I am not really sure I want to do so right now. I am not even as good in school as I used to be and I want it all to stop before I start University. I just need someone who gone through this in their life to help me out. Please. It might be as easy as "don't deposit money from now on" for you, but you don't even know what mental pain, if I can call it that way ,it really is. Struggle and temptation are key words I would use here. 99% of me don't want to deposit more money 'cause it knows I will lose it, but that 1 evil % seem to win. That needs to change. ASAP.
I am really mad at myself because I even came to this point to post something like this on an online forum like a little [Poor language removed], but it might be the best thing to do right now (seeing how great this thread really is). Thank you.
All the time, however, while I was trying to act like a proper brother and help him, I didn't notice the problem I have. It is not anxiety, it is not depression (it is kind of, at the end, but not the main cause), some would say it might not even be a problem at all, but I really started noticing it last few days and I can't find the better place to talk about it. As someone who was always the most informed one about the sports, who always watched every game as a kid, who always knew every latest transfer even in Faroe Islands League 3 to say so, I simply had to try betting (few years ago). It all started well, I won some money - lost some, but I was in plus, which was, I am not going to lie, pretty solid for a young pal. I then started earning dozens and quickly even hundreds of euros, but as I was not able to make an online account due to age restriction, I would always go to betting shops and use my pocket-money or money parents gave me for lunch as stake. It was all cool since it was 4-5 euros and really didn't affect me or my family at all. Then, a friend I met online borrowed me couple bucks on a bitcoin online betting site for fun and that was when I believe the real problem started. I quickly gone from having few euros on my account to having few hundreds and in the end, thousands euros on it. I was very proud, everyone around me were supporting me (obviously talking about friends, girls my age here, not parents or older people). I withdrew money, bought some cool stuff for myself, left some money and stopped betting for few months. Happy days.
Going 3 months in future, all the money was spent and I just needed more. I don't want to sound cocky, but I was always lucky to have more pocket-money than people my age, but that just didn't seem enough at that point, even though it was even more than I used to get before. I got into a strange world of high numbers and amounts that I simply couldn't get out. I then made account, deposited 20e and then lost it same night. That kept repeating 6-7 times and it gave me some serious headaches. Obviously I won some in the meantime, but even though wins were bigger than losses sometimes, I just kept getting depressed from all the money I lost. I was feeling down, I couldn't sleep until 5am thinking something like "Why did I put bet on that shitty Brazilian league 3 team? Why?". It was all because when leagues that I really knew everything about finished (read as European leagues) I needed something else, something to do in late night hours because all I did was betting (I am talking about a month ago period). I even started Betting Thread here, just to see I am not the only one. I just got seriously addicted to it. Now, I am not writing this because I got out of it, I just lost another (rather) big sum of money tonight and I am completely lost in this. I just don't know what to do. If I just collected all the money I spent on betting last 2 months, I would probably have more than an average Serbian wage, which is really a lot considering I am not making any money by myself. Even thought I am still in quite a big plus looking at it overally, I seriously want to get out of this. I don't want to feel [Poor language removed], to be depressed, to have headaches because of some random athletes who don't even care about me and my money. Now, to be clear, I am not even an adult yet, it's just too much for me to handle. Haven't spoken to my parents about this yet, they don't even know about it (I always lied how I am going to use money to buy stuff online just to deposit it on a betting site and it worked so far, somehow) and I am not really sure I want to do so right now. I am not even as good in school as I used to be and I want it all to stop before I start University. I just need someone who gone through this in their life to help me out. Please. It might be as easy as "don't deposit money from now on" for you, but you don't even know what mental pain, if I can call it that way ,it really is. Struggle and temptation are key words I would use here. 99% of me don't want to deposit more money 'cause it knows I will lose it, but that 1 evil % seem to win. That needs to change. ASAP.
I am really mad at myself because I even came to this point to post something like this on an online forum like a little [Poor language removed], but it might be the best thing to do right now (seeing how great this thread really is). Thank you.
The help you provided your brother will be reciprocated by many, as that's testament to the type of person I'm guessing you are.
Don't be afraid to ask for help, we all need a little helping hand from time to time lid.
My sister is suffering with depression at the moment and it breaks my heart. I'm going a sort of Action Plan with her to get her on the right path and follow up a few times a week. She is doing better. Little steps by little steps always, progress no matter how slow is always well invested with anxiety or depression.
Lots of help out there but you've acknowledged a problem you may have, is right, now get some help to fix it.
kithnou
Player Valuation: £70m
All I can add to @chicoazul's response is that you are in a fortunate position to have recognised a gambling addiction before you lose everything. In fact are still up.
Seek that help. Don't be embarrassed. Don't let it grow to what most have happen to them, ie lose everything.
Hi mate, you don't say how old you are, but I'm guessing you're under 20 ?.
This is going to be incredibly hard, but you're should tell your parents about your problems with gambling. I know if you were my lad I'd want to know and help. The old saying " a problem shared is a problem halved " is true I think in your case. You are going to need a lot of support to beat this and I'm sure your parents and family will want to help you.
That's step one, step two is to seek proffesional help - Gamblers Anonymous or something similar. I know you're in Serbia but I believe the likes of Gamblers Anonymous is a global organisation ?.
I've known fellas who have lost everything due to gambling - marriages, houses, the lot. It's a proper addiction just like any other addiction and without wanting to frighten you, you should look at it like that.
It's so easy to get in trouble with gambling with all the online sites. The TV is flooded with adverts showing young people having a great time throwing their money at footy matches using their phones. They don't show them a few years later, penniless and on their arses.
You've recognised that you've got a problem and time is on your side due to your age. Go and get help mate before it's too late . You can beat this .
As @COYBL25 said, tell your parents mate, that's honestly the first step to getting help and getting sorted. My brother had a huge gambling addiction about 4-5 years ago (he was in his early 20's), I knew he liked to bet on the football but had no idea that he'd developed an addiction to online roulette and poker. He never told anyone and got found out when he'd spent all of his wages almost as soon as they hit his account, so moved onto credit cards and his and his girlfriends joint account.
I took him to Gamblers Anonymous every week for quite a few months and he got to hear just how low some of the people had sunk in order to get a bit of money to gamble with, and the devastating effect it had on their families, thankfully the stories he heard had a big impact on him and I can't recommend GA enough to anyone in that position. There were other things in place with him to get him sorted, such as restricting access to incoming money, his wage went into an account he didn't have access to and he was then given a weekly allowance, it meant he built up a big pot of saved money in the account he didn't have access to and was able to pay off everything he owed quicker than he ever thought possible.
The first conversation I had with him when it all came out wasn't pleasant, it was a brutally honest chat about how much of a tit he'd been but letting him know we were there to help, and you could visibly see the weight lift off his shoulders and it's one of the few times I've ever seem him cry. You'll be amazed at the level of support people are willing to give you and the sooner you get it off your chest the better.
He's now recently married, got a new job and looking to buy a house as they've been able to save a decent deposit, which looked massively unlikely when all this started. I should add that my brother is a massive knobhead, so if someone like him can sort themselves out then I suspect you can.
TL : DR
Speak to your parents, you'll feel so much better. My brothers a knobhead.
The Esk
Player Valuation: £70m
http://www.theguardian.com/society/2015/oct/27/professor-green-men-suicide-documentary-bbc3
Interesting article on the upcoming documentary on BBC3 this evening at 9pm http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b06mvx4j
Interesting article on the upcoming documentary on BBC3 this evening at 9pm http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b06mvx4j
Hey guys, interesting article on an interesting way to help manage depression. Posting here in case anyone finds this helpful. Be well.
http://qz.com/532694/how-a-spreadsheet-helped-me-tackle-my-depression/
http://qz.com/532694/how-a-spreadsheet-helped-me-tackle-my-depression/
Steverton
Player Valuation: £500k
This is great, sending it to my wife now, think it will be perfect for her. She often tries to this mentally/verbally but having it actually written out and organized could really help so you can go to it whenever you're feeling down. Thanks for sharing.
moyeslovechild
Player Valuation: £15m
hard watch that doc, there is nothing easy about it and never will be, but it's a challenge our society should do its utmost to confront head on
sad in some ways it's only on bbc 3 because as tough a subject as it is, i'd say the people who most need to watch it are the ones who'll shy away from it
saw stephen's interview on newsnight too. he was very articulate and said the perception he most wanted to change was the 'selfish act' idea, given it only serves to keep the subject at arms length and reinforces the stigma that is a massive reason it's such a big prob particularly among men... despite all of this, he couldnt hide his despairing frustration at the end when asked what he'd say to him. The whirlwind of emotions that accompany the devastation of the act is no doubt why some families and groups of friends are more afflicted with suicide than others
think if you recommend the doc or docs like it to anyone, you're doing a lot of good just in that act.