wbn61
Player Valuation: £8m
lol.like I said to chico it's hard for me to see that.
kithnou
Player Valuation: £70m
It's normally always the hardest to see things in ourselves mate. I dare not speak for all in here, but I will.
You have shown us all the quality bloke you are.
wbn61
Player Valuation: £8m
thing is I don't think i'm doing a good job. l know nobody has the answer to everything but it causes probs with my wife when I can't say what she wants to hear she just thinks I don't care
Have you explained that to her? Both the pressure you feel to solve the problems and that you feel she thinks you don't care if you can't? Not in a judgemental way but just clarifying that is how you feel?
wbn61
Player Valuation: £8m
for so many years. you don't know my wife lol
lol Keep trying mate, it sometimes takes a while to get through to us wives but we MIGHT eventually listen
wbn61
Player Valuation: £8m
can't say too much but she has her problems which I have accepted so that's why i'm still with her.lol Keep trying mate, it sometimes takes a while to get through to us wives but we MIGHT eventually listen
Sounds like you have a lot on your plate mate, just try and take it day by day and cut yourself some slack.
I can sometimes get overstressed and think that everything is my job to fix and yet often when I step back and let some of the little things go they seem to get sorted out somehow and I later wonder wtf I was worrying so much about them for!
wbn61
Player Valuation: £8m
I yearn for those days lol
They will come again mate, might even be tomorrow - take care x
A friend of mine lost his dog the other week. That not might sound like a huge thing considering what you're going through, but it was just him and the pooch for almost ten years so he was understandably devestated. He's had an on-off history of mental illness and was worried about being alone, so he stayed at my place for several days. All the while, he kept apologising for not being able to stop talking about how sad he was, how lonely, how unhappy he was even before his dog died. He'd say some dark, morbid things then immediately apologise for how silly they sounded. I found myself saying the same thing over and over: just keep saying things and then we can decide if they're silly or sensible.
I think this is sort of the point, really, of talking: take difficult emotions and put words to them, turn them into sentences. Hear them out loud, read them over, and see how other people respond to them. Keeping them unformed in your head means you never get to understand them as you might if you try to explain them.
Sounds like a fairly standard human reaction tbh, for example some people throw themselves into a particular charity to distract them from brooding over their own issues. It doesn't invalidate their efforts on behalf of the charity or the genuine caring behind it, just means that everyone benefits.
Your help is closer to home but you shouldn't feel guilty for allowing it to distract you as you clearly would prefer these things not to be happening to your family, you are just seeing the silver lining in a particular dark cloud - and that is a very useful skill to have.