Discussion & help on depression & mental health related issues

[Durham Toffee]

Well done mate. Not spoken to my own dad in almost 9 years so I know how it goes.

Sorry to hear that, mate.

We all have our reasons.

Hope you find some way back - but it's not my place to comment.

 

[Durham Toffee]

Hi all, I posted in here about my disengagement with uni and general ennui. Thought I might let those know who were interested that I'm considering taking a hiatus for a year to take a break and regain my drive and motivation.
Going to consider it more after exams are finished but in the process of talking to people I respect and trust about what they think.

Whatever you need to do, mate. Internal reflection is an important part of who we are. We need time to collect our thoughts and compose ourselves at various times in our life, otherwise life becomes a carousel that we have no way of getting off.

You will come back renewed, refreshed and determined. You're not quitting, you're giving yourself that better chance; that's the braver choice, by far.

But make sure you reflect - don't start pointing fingers or blaming yourself.

 

[COYBL25]

Been put on more medication due to my anxiety and weird mood swings . That's 3 different types now . It's annoying because I can't have a proper bevy while I'm on them because I'll turn into a dribbling mess lol .

Just have to drink slower and make it last longer, either that or switch to mild !

 

[l4toffee]

Just have to drink slower and make it last longer, either that or switch to mild !

Tbh I hardly drink now anyway but I do get the odd itch to get out with my mates and have an all dayer . But I know it won't end well lol so I avoid it . If I have a drink now it's 3 bottles in the house at most .

 

[COYBL25]

Tbh I hardly drink now anyway but I do get the odd itch to get out with my mates and have an all dayer . But I know it won't end well lol so I avoid it . If I have a drink now it's 3 bottles in the house at most .

Problem with all dayers on meds is that your mates end up looking after you and pretty soon get fed up of carting you round !

 

[l4toffee]

Problem with all dayers on meds is that your mates end up looking after you and pretty soon get fed up of carting you round !

True that mate ,

 

[COYBL25]

True that mate ,

Ps, how's the voluntary work going, still enjoying it ?

 

[l4toffee]

Ps, how's the voluntary work going, still enjoying it ?

Yea mate . I'll be getting involved in a few more things with them as well as what I'm currently doing .


Also my little rant about the new medication and moaning that I can't gave a proper bevy probably sounded a bit selfish when people are having it a lot worse than that . So apologies to anyone who thinks that was a bit daft

 

[COYBL25]

Yea mate . I'll be getting involved in a few more things with them as well as what I'm currently doing .


Also my little rant about the new medication and moaning that I can't gave a proper bevy probably sounded a bit selfish when people are having it a lot worse than that . So apologies to anyone who thinks that was a bit daft

It's not daft mate, just being human that's all

 

[l4toffee]

It's not daft mate, just being human that's all

Tbh that is the least of my problems but it pisses me off more than the others at times lol it's good to have a blow out once in a while .

 

[big bobs beard]

Christ thats hard, my daughter is staying about 3 nights a week now, so i'm feeling very fortunate.

Not to cast any of my own feelings over this, but i now live in a rented flat instead of a home i helped to buy and going from being a full time father to a dad that sees her when i am allowed/can/able is absolutely crushing, being a dad is supposed ( to me) be my life and 100% of what my motivation was, it now feels like i've been cut off from her life and i'm a part of her life when it is appropriate.

Hi Bryan
Have posted in the past on this thread, and just jumped into this thread so unfamiliar with your full story. I have and am still in the EXACT position you find yourself in. I too lost a home I adored, into a rented flat as I cannot afford to buy on my own, and was left with massive debt, lost the full time dad status and know how you are feeling. Only thing I will say is it does get easier, I too have my son three nights a week and it works well , for him me and his mum. Time flies and it's never long till I see him again and he is amazingly unaffected. It also gives time for me which I was totally lost with at first but have gradually enjoyed. Am in a happy relationship for the first time in a long time and will probably take the leap and move in together when the time is right, she understands the importance of time with my son, ( as I do wit her and her daughter) and that's why we still live apart but have a great relationship. With time it gets easier, BUT PM me if you ever need it, would meet up for a pint if you ever need a chat .

 

[Durham Toffee]

Yea mate . I'll be getting involved in a few more things with them as well as what I'm currently doing .


Also my little rant about the new medication and moaning that I can't gave a proper bevy probably sounded a bit selfish when people are having it a lot worse than that . So apologies to anyone who thinks that was a bit daft

Mate it's life. We all have crappy little episodes of weeks or months were we feel like the world is conspiring and we react to it. We feel a little selfish and guilty about it at times, but the world doesn't mind because we've got a point.

It's not daft - it's a normal reaction and I respect, admire and can relate to your candid honesty.

Keep it coming.


All the best, mate.

 

[Deleted member 28206]

Hi Bryan
Have posted in the past on this thread, and just jumped into this thread so unfamiliar with your full story. I have and am still in the EXACT position you find yourself in. I too lost a home I adored, into a rented flat as I cannot afford to buy on my own, and was left with massive debt, lost the full time dad status and know how you are feeling. Only thing I will say is it does get easier, I too have my son three nights a week and it works well , for him me and his mum. Time flies and it's never long till I see him again and he is amazingly unaffected. It also gives time for me which I was totally lost with at first but have gradually enjoyed. Am in a happy relationship for the first time in a long time and will probably take the leap and move in together when the time is right, she understands the importance of time with my son, ( as I do wit her and her daughter) and that's why we still live apart but have a great relationship. With time it gets easier, BUT PM me if you ever need it, would meet up for a pint if you ever need a chat .

Inspiring to read that. Thanks a lot mate. Believe me me when I say that's that best thing I've read in ages.

 

[wbn61]

Going to the hospice in the morning for an assessment. But to be honest I'm past caring now, just feel so detached from everything, think I'm losing the fight.

 

[Abertonian]

Going to the hospice in the morning for an assessment. But to be honest I'm past caring now, just feel so detached from everything, think I'm losing the fight.

Sorry to read this mate. Sometimes other people's words are better so I'll borrow a few from one of the genius's in my avatar.

Watch out now, take care
Beware of the thoughts that linger
Winding up inside your head
The hopelessness around you
In the dead of night

Beware of sadness
It can hit you, it can hurt you
Make you sore and what is more
That is not what you are here for

That last line has meant something to me lately and might do for you. I hope things go well at the hospice and you can see a ray of light. That you feel the way you do is understandable. We still care and are willing you on through this interweb thingy!